Emerald ~book 2~

Chapter 8

~Zee POV ~
         "I love you so much Zee. Keep on fighting I know you can get through this!" Zee smiled sadly. Tears falling from his eyes, he can't believe that Saint did this. Saint really knows how to bring light to his already horrible year. 5 months he had to live thinking he failed to save Saint.

          He didn't believe a thing anyone said to him. The only signs of Saint on his body were the obvious scars on his chest. He put his hand to his chest and winced a little. The pain still there but it wasn't fully from the scars. It was also the pain he felt in his chest for failing Saint. He could of just said no and avoided all this.

The last time he saw Saint he was unconscious. But he could still feel Saint laying on his chest and the lingering touch of the kiss on his forehead. He knows Saint blames himself for what happened. But it's 100% not his fault. He wishes so much that he could have Saint in his arms.

          "Hey Zee..." Mew said from the door. Zee looked over and motioned for him to come in.

          "Hey Mew, what is it?" Zee asked lightly.

         "Just how are you feeling?" Mew asked putting a hand on his.

        "Same as I've always felt this year. Miserable, heartbroken, depressed, in pain.... you want a list?" Zee asked emotionlessly.

        "Zee come on don't joke." Mew said concerned.

        "I'm not joking, I could seriously give you a list." Mew looked at his face to see some sort of humor but he was serious.

        "Come on Zee you need to get outside." Mew pleaded looking at him with puppy dog eyes.

       "No" Zee replied blankly.

        "Why not Zee?" Mew asked.

        "Just no" Zee said getting annoyed.

        "Come on why won't you-" Mew said but Zee had, had enough.

        "BECAUSE EVERYTHING HERE REMINDS ME OF HIM MEW! I CAN'T ESCAPE IT EVERY LITTLE DETAIL OF THIS PLACE REMINDS ME OF SAINT." Zee yelled angrily. Mew looked at him shocked by his reaction.

          Zee closed his eyes and took a couple deep breaths, His fists clenched tightly. "Everything here reminds me of Saint... Saint loves the beach, Saint's always wanted to go to the Starlight amusement park. Well we live right on the beach and Starlight is literally the next island over." Zee said eyes devoid of emotion.

          "Zee I..." Mew trailed off at a lose for words.

         "Mew just leave I need to be alone, I need to think..." Zee said and sat down in a chair. Mew got up and did as Zee said and left.

          He let out a sigh and ran a hand through his hair. He promised to be a fighter for Saint but he doesn't know how much longer he can hold on. He doesn't know how he's gonna survive. His life is already so hard right now. His ears drooped sadly, it's a relief to be himself without fears of hurting anyone. But it's just another weight added to his chest too.

           His nights have been sleepless and instead filled with tears and horrible nightmares. He doesn't know when he will ever get a full night of sleep again. He's so tired physically and mentally.

            I had planned on taking Saint to Starlight later in the year. He just wished that it wouldn't be like this. Things are gonna be different and he knows that. With him being a werewolf and all. There's one thing he could do and it would stop his worry from hurting Saint. But he would never, he's too afraid. He doesn't even know if he'd do it if Saint asked. A bite won't kill a person but it's a very painful transformation still. He's been curious in turning Saint into a werewolf but he'd never without Saint's consent. He'd have to be 100% sure in his decision too.

        If Saint wasn't 100% sure in it he wouldn't do it. But right now Zee doesn't even know if he'd do it even with Saint's consent. He knows it would get him in a lot of trouble. But it would be a huge weight lifted from his shoulders. Why is he even thinking about this? It will never happen and he can't even se Saint.

        Zee closed his eyes and fell into another series of nightmares. The same everyday.