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It was during this frenzied time in 1994 and throughout 1995 that Adonis and I hit the only true rough patch in our marriage. Like most young couples, I suppose, we were making the adjustment from the novelty of living together to the reality of handling the pressures of daily life long term. In our case, the pressures were more extreme, perhaps, because of our intense work and travel schedules-Adonis's, especially.
Because Adonis now had Giovanni to accompany him on trips, I sometimes was able to stay home, as I did when Adonis had to fly to Los Angeles to make the music video for "Maria Maria," or when Adonis and Giovanni had business to conduct for the record label and the studios. Adonis wasn't so lucky. He never, ever caught a break.
At times, everyone in the band was so tired that we had to operate on autopilot just to get through our days. The music video for "Brazos Abiertos" was filmed in Hampton, thankfully, so nobody had to travel far. The band shots were of us playing inside the train station, where Adonis sang on a stairway wearing a white suit. He had also done a full day of shooting the day before on the Riverwalk, however, so he was beat.
After we completed the video shoot at the train station, we all had to drive home to Virginia Beach. Abraham had the tour bus there. I could have stayed at my mom's, but the lure of my own bed in Virginia Beach made me decide to drive the truck back behind the bus.
"Baby, you go on ahead on the bus and get some rest in your bunk," I told Adonis, because he looked so drained. "You don't have to ride back in the truck with me."
"Really?" he said. "You sure, baby? You gonna be alright driving back all by yourself this late?"
"Yeah, Bubba, I'll be fine. I've got the radio."
"Thank you, baby," he said with a sigh, and kissed me good night.
All the way home, I followed the bus on the highway and imagined Adonis crashed on his bunk, his arms tucked behind his head. I'd never been more exhausted in my life. A part of me wished right then for simpler times.
That kind of travel exhaustion led to the worst fights of our marriage. Although he usually didn't do this at first, throughout the years, Adonis liked to just go into the house and go back to sleep whenever the tour bus dropped us off after a show, leaving me to do whatever was necessary to wrestle our luggage into the house and check on the animals. This was something I was new to, as growing up, my father and brother always did those kinds of things for my mother and I, and Adonis usually did it for me when we first got married.
One night, coming home from a tour, we were both in a bad mood. Adonis liked for me to wake him up gently, like I always did, but on this particular occasion, I was out of patience with everything and everybody, so I just shook his shoulder and said, "Hey. It's time to get off the bus."
