Midas x Meowscles (FORTNITE FAN FIC)

The breakdown

<Meowscle's POV>

As I strutted down the aisle at Midas' wedding the tears started to collect in my eyes, however bottomless they were, like moths at the foot of an electric lamp. I may appear as though I have no feelings but trust me, this heavyweight champion has emotions just like everyone else. As I walked down that white path, my calves bursting out of my jeans after an intense leg day, I felt completely hollow. I clutched that peppermint and freshly cut grass scented furball in my hand, and inspected the ring inside of it. Even though it was certainly from Claire's and looked like it would give me Hepititus B, I slid the ring on to my finger and held it into my furry chest. 

"Midas." I cried. "You don't know how much I want to be with you. Yes you snapped Skye's finger in half and yes you try to eat my fur from time to time but that doesn't change my feelings towards you. Will I need to go to conversion therapy for the 8th time? No... I know how they treat cats there. A complete ban of fish and all I've ever wanted in the world was half a fish screaming in agony out of my half-shut trap, beautifully contrasted against my seemingly cute and sparkly persona."

I walked slowly down the beach, occasionally splashing the edge of the water with my big fat monster feet. I started licking them to clean myself just when I saw Skye just ahead. I contemplated saying hi but she initiated the conversation first.

"Meowscles, hi." She said.

"Hi, Skye. I can't imagine what you must be feeling. I'm sorry. Are you ok?" I replied.

"I've fallen into a deep, awful depression. After scratching off my entire face, worms and maggots have laid small colonies of eggs in various nooks and crannies of my deformity although I am quite happy about this because I have acquired new pets and I am no longer as lonely. In fact, nothing brings me joy anymore. I swapped out lemon juice for cyanide in the henchmens' washing which frightfully wiped out at least half of them but even that didn't bring me much excitement. On top of that, it has been awfully rainy recently. It has made the rock of the shark rather coarse which is excellent to run your knees on right to the bone. Did you know the knee is made up of three different bones, Meowscles? I had to learn that the hard way. Ever since Midas left me on that aisle, I've had a wave of mental disorders very much similar to the tragic 2004 Indian tsunami. I've been buying red Leicester scented candles just to constantly yet subtly punish myself every day."

I punched Skye in the face. "Skye, you know women should hide their feelings at all times." He instantly felt guilty and the maggots that landed on his hand began to sing a collection of Adele's greatest hits in sadness and dismay. "I'm sorry, Skye, I shouldn't have done that."

What was left of Skye's eyeball started to cry. I stood up and continued on the rest of his journey. I kicked the sand beneath his feet and swayed side to side while staring at the ground. I needed a getaway.

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<Later in the day.>

When I arrived at Steamy Stacks I already felt better. Whenever I felt this way I would ride the towers up and down for hours until my brain turned to mush and I had chronic schizophrenia. That way, I could see my late father who passed away a few years ago due to his drug addiction and he always knew what to do... he was always my role model, which my friends say explains a lot until I spit into their eyeballs and they contracted my raging case of herpes. 

I sat my portmanteau next to the upgrade machine which made a clink eerily similar to Midas' golden exterior. For a second I thought he was there. And so, I began to look around the room. No one had visited this place in years I thought - I swiped the counters with my finger which were caked in dust and grime. After licking the filth off my paw, I left my luggage and traversed up to the towers. Little did I know, Midas was right there at the foot of them.