Be My Future

6.

Nat's POV

I woke up and I smell pancakes. I smiled and put one of Bruce's shirts on, walking down to the kitchen.

What I had in front of me was very cute: Groot was eating his food in the corner, Bruce was cooking breakfast and on the table there was food and everything I needed.

-Good morning- he said smiling and kissed me.

-Good morning- I said -What did I do to have all of this when I wake up?-.

He smiled.

-Just stay here with me- he said and we kissed again.

-Peggy called, she asks if you two can meet a little earlier- he said.

-I'll call her later saying yes- I said -Now I want to enjoy all of this-.

Bruce smiled and we started eating. Between a kiss and a laugh we finished all the food and a couple of hours later I was in the city centre, waiting for Peggy.

-Ok so, plans for today are that you help me find a good dress and then come with ne to the photographer- Peggy said while we were at the café, having a coffee -Pleaseee-.

Peggy and my cousin Steve were going to get married and she was very nervous, she was scared that she wouldn't be able to organize everything in time.

-You are the bride, you decide- I said smiling.

Peggy smiled too.

-I know, it is just that I am so nervous- she said.

-It is normal, I mean you are getting married!- I said.

Suddenly I saw a man in the café, someone I knew very well: James.

Was he stalking me? He was everywhere!

-Nat? Is everything ok?- Peggy asked.

-Can you excuse me for a second?- I said and I left the table.

I went outside where I found James.

-Are you following me? In the last couple of months I saw you everywhere I go!- I said to him.

-I... I can't stay away from you- he said -But it looks like you are already busy-.

-What do you mean?- I asked.

-I know that you live with someone- he said sighing -It took little for you to forget me-.

-I thought I would have never seen you again!- I said.

He laughed, approaching.

-You asked me what kept me alive, what kept me sane during my time in the field: it was you, the thought of you in my arms, of your lips on ...- he said but I didn't leave him finish.

I kissed him; it was an instinct, I felt I had to do that.

He kissed me back but he left soon.

-I owe you everything, you gave me courage to speak again- I said, my eyes tearing -You weremy first love and I could never forget you. Yes, I live with a man now but I never stopped thinking about you-.

He stayed silent, staring at me.

-But you have been with a lot of women as well- I continued -As your doctor I can see all your relationships and all the people you are in contact with: they all say you changed woman every night. So please don't come here yelling at me because I stay with someone-.

And with that I walked back into the café, trying to not cry and without looking back.

-Doctor Romanoff, your last patient is here- my secretary said.

-Thank you, let him enter- I said.

My last patient was James and after what happened last time I didn't really know how that meeting would have been.

-Barnes- I said.

-Doctor- he said sitting on the chair.

-You did like I said? Have you written your nightmeares?- I asked.

-Yes, I have written them here- he said taking a notebook from his backpack.

I took the notebook and in that moment our hands touched.

I was getting away when his hand grabbed my wrist.

-This is how we met the first time, when you still didn't want to talk- he said.

I nodded enjoying is touch.

-Can you come closer?- he asked and I nodded, approaching.

He hugged me, his mouth on my neck, his warm breathe against my skin.

-I missed this- he said -When you never called me I... I thought I was nothing for you-.

-I never forgot you- I said.

Our faces were very close, I could feel his breathe on my lips.

I was so close, I...

Someone knocked at the door, suddenly, and we got away.

The door opened and Bruce appeared.

-Oh sorry I didn't want to interrupt, I was picking you up for the dinner- he said.

-No it's ok, we were about to finish- I said and James nodded -See you next week ok? And remember your homeworks-.

-Yes, thank you Doctor- James said -Have a good evening-.

James left and I started to clean the office, turning off the computer and taking my jacket.

-Was he the patient you were so desperate about?- Bruce asked.

-No, I have him tomorrow in the morning- I said sighing.

-Maybe I could cook you breakfast again- Bruce said.

-I would love that- I said kissing him.

That night I woke up with hard breathing; I sat in the bed, trying to stay calm.

I had a nightmeare and this time it was James who was dying, not my parents.

-Are you ok?- Bruce said worried.

-Yes, nightmeares as usual- I said.

-That man who was in your office when I picked you up, who was he? You two looked very close- Bruce asked.

-He... He was my boyfriend in New York- I said.

-Oh... You still love him?- he asked.

-No, I don't. When I left he never called me back and I understood I was nothing for him- I lied.

I was sure that James was still feeling something for me, but I couldn't tell Bruce that and I couldn't tell him that I still loved him.

-He doesn't know what he lost- Bruce said.

I nodded and he kissed me.

-I would never do this to you- he said.

-I know- I said smiling -I love you-.

-I love you too-.

And we kissed again.

****