In Too Deep: A Walking Dead Clementine x Male Reader

Part 33: Walk With Fear

The night is still young as I walk through the woods. It's not as loud as it was earlier, so I my defense down. I've been walking for almost an hour now, but not knowing if the others are okay has made it feel like an eternity of walking.

The area is not familiar to me at all, but I have been making mental notes of my surroundings for the travel home.  I passed the river and the road at a certain point, and even saw a bridge in the distance.  That bridge might be the quickest route of getting home, we just need to cross that and then follow the roads.  

The terrain is starting to get pretty steep, so I think I'm getting close to where the boat was.  There were some steep rock structures nearby, but I start to question myself. What if I'm wrong?  What if I'm lost, or worse I'm too late and they're dead?

"Then I guess they're dead Y/N."

I groan and turn to see Patrick walking next to me.  He looks as dead as ever, and it's just another reminder that I'm fucking crazy.  I always pick the worse times to have these episodes.  I need to be focused on the task at hand, not having arguments with people who aren't real.

"It's not my fault I'm here Y/N.  I only show up when you're fucking things up or starting to lose it, and it sure seems like thats happening."

Fuck off, you're not real.  

"I'm as real as a the chance of them being dead Y/N, and thats a pretty big fucking chance."

He's right, the chance that I'm too late is possible.  I need to be sure, I can't let these thoughts get in my head.

"Well you should.  I'm trying to help you Y/N.  Remember how you were after what happen?  You turned into something you weren't when you lost something you considered family.  Now, imagine how you're going to be when you see Clem, Aj, and Tenn dead."

He's right.  I don't know how I'll react.  Will I be able to put them down?  Will I run, leave this group and travel alone again?  Will I hunt down the Delta, kill as many as I can?  It's hard to say what I'll do, but I know for sure that I won't be the same.

"Exactly!  You know you're going to become something worse then before.  I know you don't want to hear this, but turn around and go home.  We both know they're dead, but your family back at the school isn't. Just turn-"

"NO! No....I'm not running.  You're just my fear talking, you're just a figment of my imagination, and you're not going to be popping up scaring me anymore.  So you better say your last words because this will be the last time we speak."

Patrick stops and turns to me grinning.  "I think you're right.  This will be the last time, because you're going to get yourself killed.  Can't talk to you anymore if you die.  Take care Y/N, I'll be waiting in hell for you."

Suddenly, the sound of leaves and sticks being broken is heard down the path.  I get behind a tree to hide, they most likely heard me talking to myself, so they're bound to find me.

"You! Behind the tree, come out with your hands up."

A smile grows on my face, my heart rate grows and my breathing increases.  I walk out from the tree with my hands up and with a smile on my face.  I see Clem, Aj, and Tenn all together.  I found them.

"Hey guys, lets go home."

They all rush me to give me a group hug, and we all embrace.  The hug actually cause my sides to hurt, but I could care less right now.  I found my family, and they're safe.  They all start to pull away, but before Clem does she leans in to give me a kiss on the lips.  We finally break apart, both of us smiling at each other.

I grab her hand and turn to Aj and Tenn.  "It's over boys, lets go home."

They both smile as we start to walk down the path I had just traveled down.  It doesn't take long for us to get a little ahead the kids to start talking.

"Clem, I'm sorry we left you.  I tried to jump off the cart, but the others wouldn't let me.  Eventually they let me get off, but...I should have sooner."

Clem gently rubs her hand over mine, trying to calm me down.  "It's fine Y/N.  You did all you could, and we're together again.  Are the others safe?"

"Yeah they should be home by now.  I think there's a bridge we could use as a shortcut, sooner we get home the better I say."

She nods her head and looks back at the two boys.  "I wish you were with us though.  We ran into a cave with James and a bunch of walkers, but James was more of a problem then the walkers honestly."

"What do you mean? What happen?"

"He was upset and angry with what happen to Lilly.  How I told Aj to kill her, that he didn't need to do that.  James tried taking Aj from me, but I was able to convince him to stop.  He then stayed behind to hold off the walkers, so I don't know if he's dead or alive."

I shake my head after hearing about James.  Could that have been me if I was too gone?  Who knows, but at least he won't try to take Aj again.

Clem starts to speak up again. "Part of me thinks he was right.  Aj....went to far.  I never saw him like that before, so angry and uncontrollable.  I talked to him about it, trying to make him understand he went too far and it was wrong.  It's hard to tell if he got the message, but I think he'll be okay."

I take a deep sigh and stroke Clem's hand this time.  "I'm sure he'll understand in time.  He has you to help him understand.  I worry about him and everyone.  This whole nightmare is going to leave a mark on all of our state of minds.  So, some peace and quiet will be good for all of us."

"You're right, maybe even a vacation somewhere."

Aj and Tenn run up now after the mention of a vacation.  "Where would we go?"

I think for a moment and turn to Clem.  "How's the beach sound to you Clem?"

She smiles and nods her head.  "I'd love to see the beach again.  How we gonna get there beach boy?"

I laugh at my new nickname and reply pretty quickly.  "I'd like to find an RV, that'd be nice I think."

"Yeah, I used to ride in an RV when I was Aj's age.  Last question, what are you gonna want to do when we get there."

An evil grin pops up on my face and I begin to giggle like a child.  "We'll I have an idea of what we could do together Clem."

Clem punches me in the arm, but begins to laugh too.  Aj and Tenn don't know what's going on, but start to join in with our laughter.  I finally stop laughing and give a real answer.

"I'll do whatever my family wants to do."

I smile at Clem and then the boys, who all are touched by my comment.  We continue to walk a little further, and eventually see the bridge.  This nightmare is finally over.