Chapter 17 - Ace

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I watch as Fe's car disappears from sight, the pain in my chest at watching her leave unnerves me

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I watch as Fe's car disappears from sight, the pain in my chest at watching her leave unnerves me. I don't know what I'm feeling, because I've never felt it before. I've fucked plenty of women and never have I felt the intensity I felt with Fe, the connection, being inside her felt like I was where I belong. Being with Fe brings out something in me I never knew was there, I want to mark her as mine, own her completely and take care of her. It's fucking crazy to feel this way about her after such a short time. But then I've known her since I was fourteen and she was ten.

She knows it all, the Mom that died in a meth lab explosion, the dad that cooked his own meth, the fact I lived on the streets, and she knew Billy. Today has been the only birthday I've had since my twin brother died that I haven't got black out drunk and woken up on the floor covered in my own puke. And I enjoyed it. I feel guilty for enjoying my birthday with out him, but it's all because of Fe. She came all the way out here and helped me through it, she didn't have to, no one made her. She reminded me of the good times I had with my brother, of all the shit we used to get up to. So instead of crying about losing him, I laughed about the time I had with him.

I sigh as I sit at the kitchen counter and light a cigarette. I bought this place for Billy. He used to dream some day, when we got out, we'd have a place over looking the ocean, a home with a roof, California king beds, lazy boys in front of a huge flat screen where we could relax and play video games. I have it all. I never use it, but it's there, I got everything he wanted, but will never get to see.

I used to crave the solitude of this cabin, to be alone with my thoughts. But now it just feels empty without Fe's laughter, and her cries of pleasure. What is fucking wrong with me? Fe could never be mine, I don't ever want to step foot back in Vegas, but she's going back there in a few months to be with her father. I can't keep her safe anyway, it would destroy me if I got her killed too.

But, she will go home to the safety of her father in a few months, and I already miss her heat against me, she doesn't want anything serious, maybe we could fuck until she goes home. I can fuck through all of these weird feelings until we get bored of each other and she leaves.

I should take a shower, but I don't want to wash her off me, she smells incredible, almost as good as she tastes. The sheets on the bed smell of her too, I don't want to sleep in them without her. Ah fuck it.

After taking a shower, hopefully making myself look less like shit I secure the cabin and jump on my motorcycle. I'm supposed to be MIA for another two days, but I don't want to spend them out here alone, I want to spend them in Fe.

I finally arrive in town and head straight for Fe's apartment. I park my motorcycle around the back of the shop and use my key to let myself in. I take the stairs two at a time and then knock on her door

"Just a second!" She yells from inside. A few seconds later she opens the door in nothing but an oversized sweatshirt, her hair still wet, fuck her legs are sexy, especially when I remember how well those legs wrap around my waist, or her thighs against my head

"Tommy? What are you doing here?" She asks. I could put it all out there, tell her how I feel about her, but I don't want to freak her out

"It's been a few hours since I came." I shrug smirking and she laughs, but then she groans as she rests her hand on the door frame and buries her face in her arm. This was a mistake, she doesn't want me

"I can go if..."

"No, it's not you, it's... oh fuck, you broke my pussy dude." She blurts out and I burst out laughing

"What?" I manage to get out between the laughter

"Do you not realise how huge your dick is? We've had so much sex, I'm sore, I want to but, you broke it." She shrugs, giggling with me as I laugh

"Well if I promise not to break your pussy any more can I come in?" I try and fail to ask seriously

"Sure." She smirks as she side steps to let me pass

"Are you alright? I gave you my number, you didn't have to leave the cabin until you were ready." She asks as I slip off my jacket

"I just... didn't feel like being alone anymore." I shrug

"Want a beer?" She asks as she steps towards the kitchen and I nod. She pulls out two beers and we settle onto the couch, but she's too far away. I wrap my arm around her waist and pull her against me, she doesn't say anything, just rests her head on my shoulder.

I've never cuddled, I wondered why people liked it so much, I mean, why cuddle when you can fuck? Right. But just sitting here in silence, with Fe's perfect body against mine, feeling her warmth, it's doing something to me. Fe brings her legs over my lap and curls into my side, which feels even better. I nurse my beer as I just enjoy holding her, this is so fucking weird, this should feel all wrong, but fuck me it feels so right.

Her free hand travels up the back of my neck as her fingers tangle into my hair. She looks up at me and then pulls me down until our lips meet, the kiss is slow at first, but it's hard to go slow with Fe and soon I deepen the kiss, invading her lips with my tongue, groaning at her taste, she moans softly, but then she pulls back

"Wait, I can't do this." She whispers breathlessly

"What?" I ask brows furrowed, doesn't she want me?

"It's your fault! You and your sexy tatted bikerness, and my uh..." she looks down and I laugh

"And your pussy is broken." I smirk and she giggles

"And you broke my pussy." She nods. Fuck, I haven't laughed this much since, well since Billy died. I wouldn't let myself have fun without him, but Fe just knows how to bring it out in me.

We fall back into comfortable silence, drinking beer and curled up together on the couch. I look down and realise Fe has fallen asleep. I gently take her empty bottle and place it on the coffee table. Lifting her into my arms, she stirs, but curls into my chest and goes back to sleep. I lay her on the bed, maybe I should leave, or at least sleep on the couch, but I don't want to. I strip off my clothes and climb onto the bed beside her. She curls up against me as I lie back, and for the first time I fall asleep holding a woman, it feels perfect.

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