hoodie | minchan

twenty five

"here, change into this." jisung said to chan as he hands him his clothes. the older took it and smiled guiltily before he feels a hand on his forehead.

"you're burning up, hyung. go change, i'll make you some hot chocolate." jisung said, concern laced in his voice. he quickly went out of the room, leaving chan alone. the older sighed softly before heading to the bathroom. looking at himself in the mirror, chan could feel hot tears forming on his eyes once again.

before he could have another breakdown, he shook it off and quickly change. he hates troubling jisung like this, but the younger insisted on doing so. chan wants to apologize because he was obviously at fault, and it hurts seeing how jisung still cares for him after everything they went through.

this place is like chan's second home after his own here in seoul. he has been here most of the time when 3racha decides to make music together but since that incident, chan was never even seen near jisung's apartment. after so long, being here feel nostalgic to him. he missed the memories he made here.

after changing, chan walked out of the room and make his way to the living room to see jisung had prepared blankets on the couch. "ah hyung, you must be cold. i got you some blankets, i'll be there with your drink." chan turned his head to see jisung in the kitchen as he noticed chan had changed.

the older of the two sat on the couch, feeling cold all of a sudden. he doesn't want to take the blankets because he still feels bad for troubling the younger. "hyung, you're shaking!" jisung put down the drink he was carrying on the table and quickly covered chan with the blankets. "why did you hesitate? you're close to catching a cold and i'm worried." jisung coldly stated, but a tint of worry could be heard in his voice tone.

chan feels bad for making the younger feel like this. he honestly doesn't deserve any of the things jisung had done for him. the boy has done so much, yet chan never did anything for him. "take this, it'll make you feel better." snapping him out of his trance, jisung handed him the hot chocolate he made.

chan hesitated to drink it and the younger noticed and chuckled. "don't worry hyung, i didn't put any poison or whatever." he joked. it eventually made chan cracked up a bit as a small giggle escaped his mouth. "there it is. that's the smile i want to see!" jisung exclaimed loudly, his gummy smile made an appearance.

chan couldn't help but smile at this. he missed spending time with jisung and make each other laugh. the boy in front of him never fails to make him smile even during the worst case scenario. he really wants to fix their friendship, he couldn't hold it any longer. "jisung, i'm truly sor-" before chan could apologize, three consecutive knocks could be heard from the front door.

"oh, i'll get that. be right back." jisung excused himself to get the door. chan was obviously confused by this, but he just thought that it's maybe the delivery guy or something. "yeah, come in." he can hear jisung said to someone else and when his eyes finally met the other pair, his smile dropped.

"hyung, i ordered all of us chickens. thank goodness he was around, if not all of this won't even be here and we would be starving because we all know i can't cook." jisung exclaimed, taking one plastic off the other's hand as he leads them both to the couch. chan is still in a shocked state, having a hard time processing what's happening. "hyung, are you okay?" noticing how chan is staring at him, he asked out of concern.

"changbin...?" chan trailed off.

the shorter just chuckled when he heard chan's response. "yes, hyung? what's wrong, you don't like me being here?" changbin teased, a small smirk grew on his face. chan stared at both his best friends in disbelief. why are they being so nice to him? what has he ever done to deserve all of this?

without any kind of warning, chan embraced both of them at the same time. he hugged them both tightly as if his life depended on them and he's not planning to let go any time soon. the two boys were surprised, but they relaxed into the hug as they both hugged the older back.

"i'm... so sorry." chan whispered, hot tears started streaming down his face. he had probably lost count as to how many times he had cried today. everything that occured that day were so overwhelming, he couldn't take it.

"i'm sorry for ruining our friendship. i s-shouldn't have break off anything with y-you guys in the first place. i was s-selfish and everything that happened are truly m-my fault. i'm sorry for bringing trouble into y-your lifes. i'm sorry f-for being useless and lash out my anger on you guys. i'm sor-" chan's desperate apologies got cut off by changbin and jisung pulling away from the hug and locked eyes with chan.

"none of this is your fault, hyung. stop blaming everything on yourself, it doesn't make anything better. we forgave you a long time ago and we never hold any grudges towards you. you're our best friend, and that will remain forever. we don't want to lose you. so please, instead of blaming yourself, let's just start over and enjoy our time together, yeah?" changbin holds onto both of chan's shoulders as he speaks to him softly.

chan's heart softens at his words and he finally feels like a burden has been lifted off his shoulder. "can you please smile again? i hate seeing you like this." jisung pleaded, earning a chuckle from changbin. "i agree, we missed your sincere smile." he said.

chan of course couldn't help it and showed them his brightest smile. his perfectly arranged teeth made an appearance, along with his dimples.
his eyes turned into crescents and his cheeks popped out. tears were still visible on his cheeks, but other than that, chan looked genuinely happy. he hugged the two for the last time and pulled away when he remembered about his past. he knows he has to tell this two about it or he wouldn't be able to even live in peace.

one problem after another, that's just how life works.