Survivor's Guilt || Peter Parker

Five

While he waits, the dark part of his mind wishes he never left the forest.

Apparently, Peter and Morgan were abandoned in the middle of the Tongass National Forest, located in Alaska.

While people have previously explored the environment, they had always prepared themselves with food, water, and other basic necessities that ensured their safety.

It's a miracle that Peter was still alive. If it weren't for his spider sense telling him where to go, he assumes he would still be wandering around the rainforest, never to escape.

Still, he thinks about every decision he made during his travels, questioning how Morgan had died while Peter had all of the odds stacked against his favor. He couldn't thermoregulate and he needed to consume much more food than the average person, surely that should have killed him sooner.

Peter thinks back to the water, contemplating if that had been the main cause. He had forced Morgan to drink as much water as possible, knowing that hydration was one of the key factors to survival.

Peter has a fast metabolism, and he was probably able to fight off any bacteria that infested the river.

Meanwhile, Morgan was only a child, her body was still developing and it was careless to assume she would be fine under those conditions.

There could have been deathly parasites that contaminated the body of water; Peter had a healing factor to rely on, obviously he would be able to drink it without facing any repercussions.

Though it still didn't explain why Morgan had passed away as quickly as she did. While Peter wasn't the most knowledgeable when it comes to wilderness survival, he was pretty certain it should have hypothetically taken one to two weeks before the disease fully made its mark.

Hypothermia and malfunction could have also played a factor to Morgan's demise, but if that were the case Peter should have fallen long before she had.

In the end, Peter would never truly learn what caused Morgan to die in his arms.

He tries to tell Happy this when he asks how it came about, but he was unable to put it into words.

Happy had been surprisingly understanding when he first found Peter. He made sure to thank the couple who took care of him before stowing him away into the private jet.

When he reaches over to grab Morgan, Peter freaks out. He screams at Happy to get away from him, almost kicking him in the face in an attempt to move.

Eventually, Happy had accepted the circumstances, letting Peter carry her to the jet despite having lost most of his strength at this point.

Logically, Peter knew that there was no reason to hold her as close as he did, and he would be forced to let her go at some point, but something made him feel as if he still needed to protect her.

Peter had not put her down since her heart had stopped beating, and he wasn't emotionally prepared to not have the familiar weight pressed against him despite how sore his muscles were.

Happy let the private jet fly on autopilot as he takes special care of Peter's feet. He tenderly wraps them with bandages from the first aid kit and forces him to drink a full bottle of water.

He threw it up ten minutes later, and Happy brushes off his profound apologies.

Peter would steal glances at the man whenever he thought Happy wasn't looking, and he paid close attention to his red rimmed eyes and shaking fingers.

He can't help but think it's his fault.

When the jet lands, Happy waits for Peter to stand up. He's not brave enough to do it on his own, and Happy has to coach him through it.

If it were Peter's choice, he would never leave.

How was he supposed to share with Pepper and Tony the horrific fate of their daughter? How was he supposed to look them in the eye?

Happy answers as if he's read his thoughts.

"Tony and Pepper know about Morgan."

Peter looks up at Happy, completely shocked by the news.

"How?"

Happy offers a sad smile that comes off more as a grimace. "I already told them, I thought it would give them some time to prepare."

Peter nods though he doesn't agree. There was no way to prepare someone for this trauma, and Happy knew it too well.

He eventually walks down the steps with trembling legs, refusing to drop Morgan during the process. Happy had long since given up on trying to take Morgan away from Peter, so he simply watches the boy struggle from afar.

Peter forces himself not to break down when he meets with Pepper and Tony. The pair rushes over to him, but neither look him in the eyes. They only have eyes for their daughter.

And finally, Peter lets go of Morgan, handing her to Tony.

They don't exchange a single word.

While Peter craves reassurance and forgiveness from his mentor, he knew that he didn't deserve it.

Instead, May gathers him into her arms and leads him away, and Peter goes without a fight.

He hears a scream of pure agony that leaves Pepper's mouth, and he can't stop himself from turning around.

He will never forget the soulless expression on Tony's face as he holds Morgan close to his chest, falling to his knees without a word and rocking her back and forth just how Peter had before she took her final breath.