Tales of Repatriation

America 101 - Money

Money – currency – is a tool. I learned that over many moons. Money is a wrench. Pull it out of your toolbox, use it, and put it away. The moment money becomes anything more than a tool – say your new best friend – the relationship changes and usually not for the better.

When I left Singapore, I gathered all of my random currencies (wrenches) and visited the FOREX (currency exchange) at the airport in an attempt to unload the toolbox of all irrelevant notes and buy dollars as I no longer had any need for:

Cambodia Riel

Vietnamese Dong

Thai Baht

Malaysia Ringgit

Indonesia Rupiah

South African Rand

Kenya Shillings

Rwanda Francs

UAE Dirhams (Dubai)

Pakistan Rupee

Iraq Dinar

Morocco Dirham

Japanese Yen

Philippine Peso

When I organized all of my wrenches, I noticed a few things...

A lot of notes, particularly those from countries with a lot of informal markets/informal economy, are dirty and smell a bit rotten. In most parts of the world that I've visited or lived in, the currency that eventually ended up in my hands and wallet had been hidden in a woman's bra (much safer than a wallet when she takes public transport, sits on the roadside and sells fruit and vegetables, etc.), sat in an old register somewhere, gathered mildew, or had been otherwise abused for quite some time.

Go ahead. Take a sniff of your foreign currency if you have any. Not so pretty.

When I was at a corner shop or at the fruit and veg sellers, etc.in Kenya, they occasionally handed me a note that belonged in the bin. It was torn around every edge, had no shape or function, and emanated an aroma of generational use equivalent to those socks you wore in high school and kept leaving in the locker until the PE teacher told you that they had to be removed or burned.

There were multiple instances, when I was at a large store, when the cashier would take out the "dingy note" and try to pass it on to me. Most of the time, I'd say, "no thanks – grab a different note". Everyone did. No one wants the stanky note that's two days away from turning into dust.

Some countries have gone all fancy with their currency. Singapore, Australia and a few others shifted to "plastic" (polymer) notes that are nearly indestructible and recyclable...and they don't stink. I love Australian money. It can get wet and crumpled and it bounces right back. Go ahead and just try to rip an Australian note – you can't do it.

A lot of countries print currency in different sizes so that the blind can distinguish between bills. When I first realized that Mexican pesos came in different sizes (the length varies), I didn't understand until a friend explained to me that it just made life a lot easier for sight impaired/blind people to be able to manage money. I always thought that was lovely and still wonder why the US refuses to adopt the same practice.

New American money is, truthfully, the smelliest currency in the world. According to my friends at Duck-Duck-Go, "The distinctive smell of US currency is apparently a mix of the highly absorbent materials (75% cotton and 25% linen) used to print it on with the trace chemicals from the ink it is printed with (aldehydes, furans, organic acids) and the potential coating or sealers used to finish the printing/manufacturing process."

"Distinctive smell" is kind. I dread going to the ATM now because I know that my wallet is going to become infused with the diabolical dollar scent for days afterward.

"Eau de Greenback" is not likely to become the next fragrance any time soon.

It's also not very durable. American money feels "slick" and I can tear it without any problem. Apparently, we recycle old dollars and they become part of compost, potting soil and housing insulation. Your walls are insulated with cash – and likely a little cocaine. (Several studies report that 90% of American dollars hold trace amounts of cocaine.)

Alas, I fear my fondness for carrying notes (even though they smell) is waning. It seems that no one wants cash. It's frustrating because I like paying for things in cash. I do not like having every purchase monitored, examined, and exploited as is the case with every "cashless transaction". I find that business and restaurant staff are momentarily confused when I give exact change or, heaven forbid, round up payment so that the cash back is simplified.

Calculators are commandeered. Eyebrows become tense.

I know that I have to start thinking in one currency – US$ - but it's very difficult as I still have bank accounts in Kenya and Singapore and single currency living takes some of the intrigue away from my tool chest.

While living overseas, (or just traveling on vacation), ATM's were the best tool. They were the easiest way to withdraw local currencies at the best rate and they worked most of the time. (When they didn't work, there was always a "guy" that would exchange notes which is I why I always had US dollars in my home safe or in my wallet during a trip.) The home safe had "get out quick money" which was around $3,000.00US. That was enough to pay cash for a one-way ticket out of wherever I was living. Get away money can become very important if things slip sideways as they tend to do in various regions of the world.

The amount of dollars in my wallet, however, changed based on my destination and the exchange rate at the time. If I was heading to Singapore, I'd carry $300.00US maximum. There's no threat of Singapore's currency (and government) destabilizing and the ATM's always work. Exchanging dollars for Sing Dollars wasn't any fun because the rate is the exact same as the banks. It's highly regulated. If I was heading to say Pakistan, Chad, South Africa or Malaysia, I'd bring quite a few dollars because I knew that I could exchange money at a local FOREX and get a stronger rate (vs. ATM's) so long as I had brand new, crisp, smelly, $100.00US bills and was changing a large amount. (Money changers and banks will not touch old bills – anywhere in the world.)

The ability to do business in multiple currencies, and to leverage exchange rates, was crucial when I lived and traveled overseas and rested almost solely on the power of Little Green.

US$.

The big benefit to negotiating, bartering, and exchanging Little Green is that it doesn't suffer from the fluctuations of other currencies (like Kenya Shillings). The Kenya shilling is at 106:3 (106 Shillings equals $1) and it used to sit at 101:1. (It was 63:1 when I first moved to Kenya in 2008.) The 5-point difference between 106 and 101 impacts a business substantially because it's very likely you have foreign clients, overseas supplier payments, etc. to manage. If you are paid solely in Kenya Shillings and must "buy" dollars to pay bills, etc., you will likely sustain a loss and the rate is unpredictable. One day you're up, the next day, you're down.

If the Shilling is at 106.3 today – it will cost me 106,350 Shillings to "buy" $1,000.00US.

If the Shillings is at 101.0 (which is where it sat for a long time), it will cost me $101,000 to buy $1,000.00US. That small difference can really add up when you're dealing with large invoices.

I'm still converting prices into Sing Dollars (SGD) first before fully absorbing the actual US$ price. I still convert in Kenya Shillings, at times, but that's quickly fading.

I miss my multi-currency, crazy toolbox most days and know that it will take time to get used to having a single wrench.

#sigh

#littlegreen

#usdollars

#US$

#forex

#moneyexchange

#money

#expat

#repatriation

#expattales

#learningtoamerica