Vikings x Reader

Catboy! Hvitserk would include...

A/N: I will never understand how you people could want more of these but okay! I guess!

- Gods above, if you thought Ivar was a riot

- Let me tell you, Hvitserk is WORSE

- Ivar's an asshole, yeah

- But unlike Ivar, who does things to spite you and his brothers, Hvitserk does them for fun

- And, he'll admit, to annoy his brothers

- Out of all of them, he's the most energetic one

- You're surprised he hasn't started bouncing off the walls yet

- Unfortunately, his energy makes him more of a troublemaker than his brothers

- He has this habit of grabbing your wallet before you leave

- It doesn't matter where you're going, if Hvitserk knows you're leaving, he'll grab your wallet and make a run for it

- Good luck trying to catch him

- The little bastard can RUN

- He won't stop unless he gets tired

- Or unless he can tell it's an emergency

- Or unless Bjorn gives him the look™

- He likes hiding your things and blaming Ivar for it because he knows Ivar is the one that usually pulls that kind of shit

- For obvious reasons, this gets on Ivar's nerves

- Hvitserk loves sleeping

- The majority of the time, he really falls asleep by accident

- He tires himself out

- He usually falls asleep with his butt in the air

- He's a really heavy sleeper, it's kind of insane

- So far he's slept through a tornado, a hurricane and Bjorn and Ivar screaming at each other for a half-hour

- The only thing that wakes him up? Your 6 am alarm

- How he fucking hates that alarm

- If he wakes up to the alarm before you do, he'll grab your phone and either attempt to smother it with a pillow

- Or he'll bite it until it stops ringing

- Anyway, due to his hyperactivity, you sort of figured there has to be a way to tone him down a bit

- Right?

- A good friend once offered catnip and,,, OH BOY

- Those were the worst ten minutes of your life

- So, you turned to CBD-infused cat treats

- I have good news and bad news

- The good news, they kind of calm him down a bit!

- The bad news, now he's fucking obsessed with them

- He will NOT eat any treat that isn't CBD-infused

- Congratulations, Hvitserk is now a stoner kitty

- Good luck with that

- Hvitserk isn't as clean as the rest of his brothers

- If he were a character in Sims, he'd be the one walking around all day with that little green cloud of stink all over

- To make things worse, he DESPISES baths!