A Rocket To Mars

A Rocket To Mars: Chapter 30

I jumped out of my sleep quickly, my eyes big as I stared across the hospital room. "Fuck," I whispered out loud pushing my hair back as I let out a breath. When I fully came back to reality I sat up to look at Diamond. Still sleeping.

I sat back again and closed my eyes tight. My nightmares had been terrible ever since it happened. It’s been a week and a half since the accident. I hate calling it an accident because in all reality it wasn’t. It could have been avoided and no matter how much everyone told me it wasn’t my fault, I still believed just that.

It’s been killing me not being able to see her smile, or hear her voice. When I think of how much I love her now it baffles me. But, she was still here on earth with me, and that’s all that mattered.

Phil walked in slowly closing the door behind him, “She woke yet?” I looked down and shook my head slowly beginning to play with my fingers as I always did. He came and sat next to me, rubbing my back, “It’s gonna be alright Brunz, you know we all here for you.” “I know..” Yeah I knew everyone was here for me, but I just felt like I was missing something. A part of me wasn’t me anymore.

 “I had to watch her mom cry Phil,” I choked out learning my head up. I had never even met the woman and I knew my first impression wasn’t much of a good one. I had so many thoughts running through my mind at once. The wrong ones had been coming out lately. Phil looked down to the floor, he had nothing to say and hadn’t a lot of the times since everything had happened.

Nicole, I hated to even think about her anymore. I knew it was in some way all her actions that had caused this. I was too busy thinking she was going to come after me, when she came after her instead. I put my head in my hands again grabbing at my hair some as I tried to think of one thing that made sense anymore.

 “Any news from the doc?” Phil said breaking the silence. I looked at him, “Well there’s a chance she won’t remember some things.” Phil shook his head, “Damn.”

I looked at her again taking a deep breath. I loved someone that most likely wouldn’t even remember my name. However, I was still going to love her just the same, and there was a small hope that I had that one day, she would remember. But, if that never happened then I would be there helping her through everything else.

Another night spent at the hospital, another class missed. I couldn’t keep doing this. I wasn’t eating right, and I was barely sleeping. I just wanted to be there when she finally did wake up. I didn’t want to be selfish, but I wanted my face to be the first one she saw.

And finally that day came..

I know I’m woke but, I’m scared to open my eyes.

I felt like I was lying on a bed of rocks. I opened one eye; ok hospital not good, I thought to myself. I opened both eyes just as a nurse walked past my door, I opened my mouth to say something, but no words came out. I started to sit out but pain rushed through my body and everything ached. “Ow..” I groaned out as I laid all the way back again. “Ow.. ow” I was in so much pain that I almost wanted to cry.

My breathing became faster as I started to panic, I was so confused and I didn’t know what to do. “Diamond.” I looked over at the sound of my name. I stared off at a guy who didn’t look too much older than me. His hair was messy and he looked tired. He slowly pushed his blanket to the side as he stood, my body tensing as he came near me.

He was so handsome and his eyes we’re like something I had never seen before. He looked over me sadly, his hand slipping through part of the bed to touch mine.

“Hey..” he simply said as his eyes began to water. He squeezed my hand as he stared back at me. I closed my eyes as he leaned down, putting his head down on my chest. I wrinkled my forehead some as I felt him begin to cry, body jerking as it grew worst. I slowly lifted my hand putting it on the back of his head, “What’s… what’s going on?” I said as best as I could. He sniffed some before he moved his head up kissing my cheek before he kissed me on the lips.

I widened my eyes quickly as I tried to pull him away, a nurse walking into the room. “Hey! What are you doing?” He leaned up and looked at her before he looked back at me, his cheeks red and covered in tears. I looked at her as she walked closer. “You’re woke,” she said with a huge smile. I nodded some and slowly held up my hand, I wanted to get off of all of this stuff and out of this bed. She took my hand and looked up at the screen that read off my vital signs. “Do you know you’re name?” I nodded some, “Diamond.” “Alright, do you know what today is?” I shook my head and squeezed her hand some as I looked over at him. His eyes stared back at me as if he wanted me to say more.

I whined some as the nurse walked around my bed doing more things then I could understand. The guy gripped onto the side of the bed causing me to look at his hands. “Don’t say much to her.. She’s lost quite a bunch of her memory and I don’t want you to upset her.” I looked up at him as he nodded and his hands loosened from my bed. The nurse pulled up the blanket more, “You should rest as much as possible ok?” I nodded some as he began to back away.

I backed myself up until I fell back into the couch. I slowly put my head in my hands. Why is this happening, I thought I would be able to deal with this, but I can’t.

I can’t see her like this..