I can't fall for you

Being held by you

The ride home was quiet and awkward. I didn't know what to do or say. Suddenly the car stops.

"Lets stop acting like strangers" Niall says

"I just don't know how to feel" I say

"Feel like you love me, like ya know ya do" He says.

"I do love you Niall more than anything in the world! I say

"Then act like it! I made a fucking mistake Okay?! Jesus!" He says sternly his face turning slightly red

"I'm trying okay!" I say, "Was that mistake worth this Niall?"

"Oh my God Casey!, No! it wasn't! Okay everytime she would kiss me I could only think of you!" He says

"Still you didn't pull away" I say a tear slipping down my face. He starts to drive again not saying a word. Looking straight forward, but still lost in thought. He just drove. I could tell he was feeling the same way I did that night at the club. Numb.

Soon we arrived at the house he opened the door, and went straight to the bathroom. I just sat on the couch where we had been way earlier that day. It felt like a billion years ago. We were now strangers to eachother. I didn't want it to be this way. I still loved him. I think he loves me. I'm pretty sure anyway. Eventually, he comes out of the bathroom.

"We're not finished talking about this!" He says

"I didn't think so." I said

"I didn't pull away because I was weak you weren't there!" He says. I stand up.

"So its my fault you fucked some girl that wasn't me is that it?" I say

"Thats not what I meant and you know that Casey!" He yells

"Do I?" I say and walk away. He pins me agains the wall.

"Damn it Casey!" He yells punching the wall next to my head. I collapse. He almost punched me. Not Niall He wouldnt do that. He collapsed beside me in sobs.

"I'm so sorry princess, I'm sorry about everything. You deserve so much better than me! Go just leave okay? Get someone who is not a jerk!" He says violentle sobbing. 

"Niall, we can't do this, I won't let this destroy us not this time." I say and scoot over and sit on his lap.

"I'm so sorry" He cries into my neck, "I'm so sorry." I hush him and kiss his lips for a while. Eventually, we get up and go  to the bedroom. It was hard letting him touch me like that knowing he had done some other girl like that also. I pushed it out of my mind and enjoyed him. Later that night we lay in bed holding hands and laughing. I felt better than I had in a long long time. I felt that maybe he wouldn't make that mistake again. I knew I couldn't ever do that to him. I loved him to much. I just hoped he loved me like that. 

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