To Throw It All Away

Chapter Two: It's A Girl Party

“Here you go, runt.” Maddie scowled, handing me the remote after her recording of Project Runway finished. Though she was only a year and a half older than me, she’d recently started calling me runt. I didn’t appreciate it at all.

Mom came down the stairs, fishing for her car keys out of her black Coach purse. She was taking Maddie to a doctor’s appointment after her left foot had been bothering her for a few weeks now. Every time she was risking an injury, Mom always made a point to take her in ASAP. If Maddie couldn’t dance anymore, it would be the complete end of the world.

“We’ll be home in about an hour.” She told me as she and my sister headed out the door. I crept to the window and watched them get in the van and drive away, then I pulled out my phone and searched for my Girl Party music video. It had been quite a while since I’d last watched it and I was a little nervous about it. I collapsed on the couch and my dog Maliboo jumped up beside me, licking my face.

It started with me lying on the floor, arms folded behind my head. All of the Abby Lee Apparel immediately made me sick to my stomach. This was MY video, but Abby just used it as a way to promote the ALDC and make more money for herself. I couldn’t believe I’d let her dictate my life like that. Then again, I was only nine years old and overeager to be a pop singer. Though the video was fun and one of the best things in my life, I now had regrets about doing it.

Also, Abby seemed to make my sister the focal point of a good portion of the video. I was the one who agreed to let her be in the video, but that didn’t mean she had to be front and center in every shot. It also pissed me off how she didn’t let Chloe be in it because she wasn’t an official ALDC member. Chloe was my friend and she should’ve been in my video. That was another regret.

The autotune was almost unbearable. Half of the words you couldn’t even understand. I got all kinds of hate for it from my supposed fans. I took voice lessons. My voice couldn’t be that bad. They’d done the same thing to Brooke when she’d made her album. I still think people would’ve liked my songs and bought the album if I’d used less autotune. Abby didn’t care what the people wanted. She just did what she wanted for herself. I couldn’t believe I’d worshiped that woman for so many years. She was the most selfish person I knew.

My whole video would’ve been better if Abby hadn’t dictated the whole thing. This was why my singing career had plunged into the toilet before it had even started. Her goal from the beginning was to ruin me, and she had. I hoped she was happy.

Maliboo licked my face. At least she still loved and appreciated me. I had to prove my worth to the world and to my family. I was more than just Maddie Ziegler’s little sister and a little brat from Dance Moms. I was better than that. I was determined to prove it.