Wild (Cherik Book One)

Spend My Love Heartbroke

    "Forever ain't half the time I wanna spend with you."

______CHARLIE___TW: Mentions of abuse and depression
Time passes differently for everyone. Charlie knew this for a fact for several reasons. The first being that Raven's concept of time was somewhat of a wildcard growing up. Her "the other day" could be years ago. So, he had gotten quickly used to the reality that she would never really be reliable for time frames. The second reason was the fact that whenever he was with Jack, time seemed to come to some awful grinding halt. Minutes felt like hours. Days felt like years. This, Charlie found, was a newer development. In the beginning of their relationship, when it was all sunflowers and stolen kisses, time felt fleeting. Charlie always felt like there was never enough time he could be spending with Jack. But, he supposes when people change so does the atmosphere of time around them. Charlie knew that it was going to be bad when he saw Jack. He knew that he had stepped way over the line this time. The silent method had kept Charlie as safe as possible. Hanging on Jack's every word like gospel has kept Charlie comfortable. Or at least as comfortable as he could be. It wasn't so horrible if he just walked out of his body for a while. But, not now. Charlie knew he messed up both by the ringing sirens in his head and the constant buzzing of texts from Jack. Each seemingly more threatening than the last. He was half tempted to turn off his phone but he couldn't for the fear of Raven needing him.
    Charlie stopped at the stop sign right before the turn to go home. His yellow vehicle came to a halt as his mind wandered. What if he just turned right instead? What if he took the highway out of town and never stopped? In the dark shadows of the three am sky, there was a sort of rebellious call to the road less travelled. Everything seemed easier to do, easier to confess, in the midnight hours. Bright twinkling auras above his car, just visible through the windshield. A million galaxies waiting to see what Charlie would do. He held his breath for a moment as he got a small taste of what the freedom would be like. He would be in the big city with the love of his life. A boy with messy hair and a crooked smile whose laughter would fill up any void in Charlie's chest. Raven and Marina shared an apartment next door and would visit unannounced. Hank would be at a prestigious university saving lives with his new discoveries. Alex would go pro but Darwin preferred a quieter life. Maybe he and Angel and Sean have an apartment. Charlie chuckles at the thought of how obnoxious they would be together. It was a nice fantasy. Charlie would be happy, in love and safe. But it was just that...a fantasy.
Charlie turned left. Home to an empty lot of echoing halls that simultaneously suffocated and blinded him like a sickness. He felt the sting of tears on his cheeks but didn't bother to stop them. Once again, being too tired to do so. These days though, Charlie was having a harder time telling between emotional and physical exhaustion. The two were blurring into each other like a tornado and Charlie was afraid that when it passed, there wouldn't be much of him left.
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Charlie curled in on himself as he laid in bed. The silence was deafening as the record came to a soft end. The blanket wrapped around him like a warm hug in the chill bedroom. Buzzing messages became white noise as the cracks in Charles armor opened. The bruise on his chest wasn't as bad as he thought, the yellow shades would dissipate in a few days. But, the heartbreak wouldn't dissipate so easily. The bright moonlight that snuck through the thin white curtains reminded Charlie vividly of Erik tonight. Erik held him so close, anchoring him down to earth when so often Charlie felt like he was floating aimlessly. What torture was this? Bound to be just out of arm's reach of the only person he ever loved unconditionally. He thinks at some point he loved Jack like that. Maybe when the rose tinted shades still worked and Jack's smiles seemed less threatening. Now, loving Jack was painful. Maybe that was love though, Charlie thought. You have to sift through the bad to get to the good...right?
Charlie picked up his phone to make sure none of the incoming messages was from his sister. Unfortunately he was just met with Jack's name repeatedly. Then...