The Hale Orphanage

Ch. 4

Stiles: 18 Derek:20

Even once Stiles joined Derek in high school their relationship never went back to normal. Derek could never really make time for his young friend. Though it depressed him deeply, at time he was grateful. It meant he could love Stiles from afar and no one could be hurt, or at least that was what he told himself. Then once he decided to take up the athletic side of high school he really had no contact with the other boy at all. Stiles didn't participate much in school, he did just enough socializing to where he didn't come off as a creep and kept his head in the books.

Once he went off to college their friendship was nonexistent. Derek came home less and less. He'd still hold his breath when he'd pass Stiles throughout the house but he'd always keep to himself. Soon the new normal was for Stiles to never hear from him.

It had been three months since the two last saw each other and far longer since they had spoken. That's why Stiles was shocked when he came home from school to look for an after school snack but found Derek and pretty girl with golden locks laughing over chips and dip. Derek and Erica had quickly become best friends and the blonde easily knew how to read the young boy. Then again anyone could tell Derek had feelings for Stiles just by the way his entire body tense when he walked into the room. Derek's eyes never left him, not for a second.

"Stiles" Derek called once he made it into his eyesight, he offered him a soft look. Stiles took it as pity.

He swallowed thickly, hoping it would get rid of the lump in his throat "Hey bea-Derek" the slip up was small but still it was there, and Derek was preening to hear the nickname again. The small nick name took up so much space in his heart.

"Sti hey" He greeted, and sat there just staring for a few moments, taking him in. His hair had gotten so much longer and it looked perfect on him. He had gotten taller which Derek hated, he'd liked when Stiles would have to use his tip toes just to get to eye level. The young boy scratched awkwardly at the back of his neck while Erica just calmly switched her gaze between the two bays "Oh! This is Erica, a friend from school. Erica this is Stiles" he offered her a wave before reaching in the fridge. He snagged a a juice bottle then hoofed it to his room, mumbling an excuse about having to study over his shoulder. Derek watch him retreat longing to be able to hug him again, to tell him about his life and have Stiles do the same.

"Who's he?" Erica grinned with a wicked smile.

"An old friend"

He had been home almost a week alternating his time between hanging with Erica who had came to spend half her break with him, and sleeping mainly. He hadn't seen Stiles since the day in the kitchen, he couldn't tell if Stiles had been avoiding him or if it was just by chance they never seen each other. Whatever the reason, Derek was longing just to get another glimpse.

One night Erica left to her hotel leaving Derek alone in the house he once spent hours upon hours, running around with Stiles in. Now he couldn't remember the last time he really just sat there. He headed out to the porch perhaps to watch the skies when he was met with honey brown eyes he knew all too well gazing up at him. Stiles was already on the large patio, his nose in a growing stack of notes.

"Sti" he spoke tentatively, he didn't really have anything to say. It was like he saw him and had to speak.

He didn't look surprised to see Derek, he didn't look excited either, it was just a stoic expression that Derek wasn't used to seeing when it came to Stiles. He swore there was always a glimmer of hope in his eye when the two would cross paths but now there was nothing "Sup Derek" he greeted, offering a small smile before glancing back down.

"W-What are you doing?" He slid into the chair across from him, carefully not to touch the scatter of paper.

"Just finishing some notes for Pre-Calc"

"Nice. Do you have Ms. Remy too?"

"Yeah she's like a hundred. I was hoping she'd be gone by the time my senior year came"

Derek sat back chuckling "Right! I swear she's older than dirt. But I guess she's going to fail kids until she can't anymore" Stiles offered a laugh back. Derek, no matter how hard he tried, couldn't remember the last time he and Stiles really bonded over something.

Before he even understood what he was doing his mouth was moving again"H-Hey, do you maybe wanna get a hamburger, I am starving"

The boy looked up with curiosity and doubt mixed throughout his eyes "Uh yeah definitely just let me-"

Stiles was cut off my the sound of Derek's phone ringing, it was Erica. He held up a finger stepping away "Just give me a quick second"

"Hello"

"DerDer" She sung into the phone, which meant a favor was coming.

"Erica? What's up?"

"Come, meet me at my hotel so we can go downtown, It's my last night and I wanna get some clothes"

"Erica I'm kinda-"

"Come on Der please" He heard the pout in his best friends voice and he let out a hard sigh before agreeing. She would be home the next night and he had failed to take her shopping like he had promised. Derek hung up leaving her with the promise to meet her in twenty.

"Hey, sorry about that maybe we can rain ch-" Derek had began as he turned, but he was only met with Stiles stalking away notes clutched firmly to his chest.

Derek let his mind drift to Stiles that night as he trudged along the out door mall with his friend. Erica was going on about not wanting to go home while Derek thought about nothing but home. About how being with Stiles used to feel like the only home that mattered. His heart clenched thinking back to the fact that he had lost that.

"Okay what's going on?" she stopped suddenly.

"Huh?"

"I know there is something bouncing around in that head of yours. Since you've gotten home you've been anxious and distant" she sighed with a sympathetic look for her best friend. Needing a rest anyways she tugged on his arm to a near by bench "C'mon Der, talk to me"

He sighed throwing his head back. He could live to regret this, but getting it off his chest just might be what he needed "It's Stiles"

She clapped her hands together suddenly "I knew it. I knew that little brown eyed beauty is what had you in knots. So what is it?"

"I... We've been-were close for a long time. He was the best part of my life. The older I got the more I understood that... that I was in love with him"

"Aw Derek. That's sweet. I'm still not seeing a problem though" by now her stiletto was on the floor while she rubbed at her bare foot.

He sighed, and ran a frustrating hand down his face. This was all so complicated when it shouldn't have been, Derek just loved to overthink "I got scared, I didn't know what to do. So I ended up slowly pushing him away until our relationship seemed like it was made up in my head"

"Derek" she exhaled.

"What was I supposed to do? I-I freaked out. He was everything I ever wanted and I was scared to lose him but it hurt too much to not be able to act on my feelings and I just shut down"

"-and now?" he shrugged not knowing, he didn't know much of anything anymore "Derek you are your own worst enemy. I mean really? Confessing your feelings was worse than loosing your best friend. Life is way too short to let fear cripple you, you see me-I walk around like I own the world. And hey, you just might find out Stiles felt the same way the entire time and you'll really hate yourself the longer you wait because that's just time wasted"

"Easier said than done"

"No Der, it's not. It's quite simple- you love him, and he's waiting"