Free falling

Pastelillos and Pillow Forts

I am literally on the edge of pulling my hair out. That or a mental breakdown. Either is possible at this point. I can't find a suitable apartment anywhere! I've looked at all the available listings. The only one that came close I immediately dismissed when the landlord kindly informed me that he was willing to look over any missed payments in trade of any favors I could offer him. It didn't take a genius to figure out what he meant and I left immediately after.

I'm sitting outside Carrie's door on the floor, clutching the newspaper listings in my hand and listening to Jamie laugh with Carrie. It's been 2 days and I haven't found a place for us. I take a deep breath and lean my head back against the door and close my eyes. My head is pounding and I can feel the frustration start to build up inside causing my throat to clog up, a sign that often leads to crying. I hear the elevator ding and someone get off but I keep my eyes closed and focus on taking calming breaths. Crying isn't going to help me find an apartment any faster. I'm so focused on calming myself down that I don't even notice someone stop in front of me.

"Princesa, estás bien?" My eyes snap open at his voice and I find him crouched in front of me. Of course he finds me like this.

"I'm fine. Just a bit tired". He gave me a disbelieving look but thankfully doesn't call me out on my lie.

"Perhaps it's better if you rest inside then, instead of out here on the floor." I looked down embarrassed and made a noncommittal sound. I pushed myself up off the floor and brushed myself off. I avoided Xavier's eyes as I turned towards the door as I prepared to go inside. Before I could reach for the door handle his hand snapped out and spun me around and I softly collided into a firm chest. Arms wrapped around me and held me tight.

Instead of fighting him off, I sank into his embrace. It was warm and comforting and for a second, I believed everything would be okay. I haven't hugged anyone besides Jamie in years. Not since Richard's abuse started. That thought made me snap my eyes open and hastily retreat from his arms. I felt cold at they loss of contact so I wrapped my arms around myself to keep some of the warmth. I was embarrassed and confused by my actions. By his actions. None of this made sense.

"Umm, thank you." I tried to keep my voice steady but it sounded shaky even to me. He didn't reply. Only stared at me with his unwavering gaze. His eyes giving away nothing as to what he is thinking. "So yeah, I'm gonna go inside now"

"How about we talk once we get inside, sí?" My first instinct was to deny him, but something else had me nodding my head in agreement. I stiffly turned around and went inside. The first thing I heard when I got inside was a battle cry that I was very familiar with and only had a second before a little body launched themselves into my arms. I stumbled back a bit but Xavier was quick to steady me. I turned to look at him and he seemed to be frowning slightly at Jamie. I sent him a glare and stepped out of his hold as I turned my full attention back to the child in my arms.

"Hi Kami! I missed you! You was gone for sooooo long! Cherry let me play with the neighbors dog. It was little and fluffy and barked a whole bunch!" I just smiled and listened and he told me all about his day. He was so excited. "Did I surprises you! I did my best warrior cry just like you taught me! Did I do goods?"

"You did great little monster" I said with a laugh. "Keep practicing and you'll scare all the bad people away." I gave him a peck on his cheek and placed him down. He gave me a big smile and proceeded to drag me down to where he and Carrie made a pillow fort. As he went inside I took a glance around the room noticed Carrie and Xavier with their heads together and talking in hushed whispers. Xavier looked my way and held my gaze. I looked away quickly and watched as Jamie climbed out from his fort. He grabbed my hand and pulled me inside. I'm lucky to be so small or there would be no way to we would both fit in here.