undeniable

36| i love you

MADDIE

I SUCK AT apologies. Like, absolutely suck.

Even though that's true, I know I need to apologize to Parker for freaking out about his choice of colleges.

If Linfield or Pacific make him happy, then that makes me happy too.

Knocking on his door a couple times, I expect him to be asleep. I mean, it's midnight.

"Come in, Mads." He replies.

"How'd you know it was me?" I question, walking into the room with two tubs of ice cream.

"Because I know the way you knock. Now, what may I help you with?" He glances up from his laptop, sitting on his unmade bed, clothes thrown everywhere.

And not all his.

I doubt Parker would look too nice in the little bootie shorts that've been thrown on the floor, partially hidden under his gym bag.

Thankfully it's his spare, clean one.

"I'm here because I was an absolute bitch and acted like a spoiled brat. So I've brought some ice cream and a hug as an apology, I hope you'll accept." I reply, throwing a pair of jeans off the bed before sitting on it across from him.

He smiles, shutting the computer.

"You were kinda bratty today, huh?"

"Shut up," I snap, setting the tubs down on his night stand and hugging him tightly.

"I love you and I'm sorry. I'm thankful you found somewhere that makes you happy and I hope you do absolutely amazing in your dream school." I mumble, leaning up to peck his cheek. 

He grins, squeezing me before letting go and grabbing a tub of ice cream.

"I'm kinda worried about leaving." He admits, shrugging.

"Well, if they take me, which would be amazing." He adds, pulling the lid off.

"They're going to take you. You're smart, you're a great basketball player, they'd be idiots to refuse you." I assure him, and he gives me a little smile.

"Why're you worried about leaving?" I shovel ice cream into my mouth, leaning against the wall.

"I don't like being away from you guys under any circumstances, it just makes me uneasy. I worry if Sam is treating you right and it makes me feel better to actually see you two together, not just hear about it. And I mean, this stuff about Livia scares the shit out of me too. What if I'm four hours away and something happens to one of you? I can't be there as fast as you would like to, I can't be there to help or anything." He rants, and I let him go, knowing he probably needs to vent a little.

"And right now is a crucial part in my relationship with Leo. This is the time when we're still figuring each other out, learning what each other's favorite food is, what sleeping position they prefer, what they hate and what they love. I want to know we're good before I leave, long distance isn't easy if we barely know each other. I don't want to hurt her by not being good enough or responsive enough. She doesn't deserve that. If she's unhappy trying to make us work, I don't want to put that on her. I love her, Maddie, she should have someone who gives her all the attention and care she wants."

He looks pained, so he just distracts himself by digging the spoon into his ice cream.

"Don't fast forward all your time away, you still have six months to gross everyone out with your sickening love. I have no doubt in my mind that you guys will be just fine, I can already tell you both are in for the long haul." I pat his cheek, and he smiles, nodding.