We Are Monsters 🌕 Book 1 || gxg

Cross-Country

Hyper-focused on the trees a dozen metres or so from where Sam stood, her hammering heart deafened her to her surroundings. Something was moving in the trees. Something large. A chill wracked her spine and set every little hair on edge. For a second she thought it was Aidan, but Aidan wouldn't emerge with his hands up, palms facing her with relaxed fingers. The sunlight struck his hair a brilliant caramel, and she knew at once Noah had found her.

The roaring in her ears drowned out his voice. His approach was steady, but relatively nonthreatening. She might have projected the threat, or she might have projected the peace offering. It was so hard to tell with him. His gaze never strayed from hers, and the hardness she was used to seeing there was minimal. She wasn't sure if it was a trick or genuine, so she held her ground and worked to slow her pulse.

As he neared he spoke again, and this time it reached her. "Please, I just want to talk."

Her head cocked to the side. "Why?"

This gave him pause. The stream bisected the lush ground between them. Noah's hands were still raised, though slack now, probably because she hadn't made any move to attack him. She struggled to unclench her fists. His brow scrunched in thought, and he seemed to forget his efforts to display harmlessness, arms falling to his sides as he considered his response.

"I'm tired of running." His shoulders lifted lightly and settled once more. "I just want to talk to you."

Noah's French wasn't as smooth as his brother's, but he didn't struggle with his sentences. His vibrant blue tee shirt contrasted with his tanned skin, and in the crooks of his arms she noticed a smattering of waxy scars. Noah followed her gaze and stuffed his fists in his pockets, eyes falling.

"Yeah, those are ... well, they got the job done. I never used needles if I could avoid it." Shame dripped from every word.

Sam bit her lip, eventually saying, "I know."

His eyes flew to hers. "How? I never told ..." Dawn crossed his face, leading first shock, then alarm, horror, and finally dread. "You have my journal."

"Yes, and I've read it; I'm sorry." Tension hadn't yet left her, but she didn't sense any immediate danger.

"The whole thing?" Trepidation clung to his words as a flush bloomed in his cheeks.

"Yes," she answered, and thought of something she had wondered for a while. "If you don't mind, why did you stop writing?"

Noah frowned. "Well, I lost it."

"No, I mean after September last year, there's no more entries. Why did you stop writing?"

Noah's frown deepened as the silence stretched on. It wasn't a concerning frown, but a confusing one. He seemed perplexed, and it was beginning to affect her.

"I ... didn't," he said slowly. "I wrote right up until I lost it."

They stared at each other for a time, and in the same instant they murmured, "Aidan ..."

But why tear them out? What could possibly be so bad he didn't want her to see it? Or perhaps it was about him, that would be understandable.

Noah scrunched his eyes shut and cringed as though overtaken by a sudden pain. It lasted just a second, but his face underwent a myriad of contortions. She couldn't help tensing up again; she didn't trust him in the slightest. The spasm faded and all that remained was the furrow between his brows.

"Noah?" Sam began in a delicate tone. "Are you high?"

"No."

Sam wasn't sure which answer she was expecting. Both were probably bad news. At least sober, though, she could access his rationality ... in theory. Maybe she could resolve this all without any more fighting. She may have been harbouring some festering grudges, but she certainly wished him no more pain. It did nothing for him in the past and it would do nothing good for him now. Nor her, for that matter. She didn't want revenge, it had never been about that. She wanted to stop him from hurting people, whether that meant helping him get better or apprehending him. On a deep exhale she attempted to lessen the hostility in her posture.