The Healer

Chapter Ten: Memories of Long Ago

Thank you to anyone who's sticking with me through this crazy writing journey. I find some days harder than others, but while I was showering tonight... I was struck with inspiration. I hope that it leaks right out onto the page from the recesses of my mind.

Happy reading! <3

Zane

Her words echoed in his head.

"You really don't understand. I don't trust you either."

She didn't trust him in the same ways he didn't trust her. Zane couldn't lie to himself or his wolf. He'd made assumptions in the deepest parts of his mind about the way she'd lived her life before. He'd wondered who she'd been seeing. An abusive boyfriend? What had she done to end up with a pup that wasn't fathered by her mate? His wolf growled in his mind, fueling his jealousy.

He clenched his fists and removed the image of Asa with another man from his thoughts. A twinge of guilt hit him as he thought about little Luna. He'd held her tiny body in his arms only once, felt her delicate skin against his calloused hands, and breathed in her warm, lavender scent. He wanted to feel jealous and angry that she wasn't his own, but Luna felt as if she were meant to be in his arms anyway.

Zane sighed, running his fingers through his disheveled hair.

He hadn't said anything after Asa's words. He had moved aside and let her go.

He couldn't explain the way he was feeling. There were too many emotions to put a name to, but his thoughts were everywhere all at once.

All of the countries he'd seen, the friends he'd made all over the world meant nothing at this moment. He hadn't found his mate in his travels and for a while, he'd given up on the idea. But here she was in his home and he didn't know a damn thing about her except that she'd had a child without him.

His mind went to the look in her eyes, the look of sadness he saw in their depths. It was a pain he knew far too well...

Zane was only six the day he lost his parents, but it was a day he would never forget.

It was raining hard when Zane awoke. The twin bed he had been sleeping in felt too big. His plain blue quilt seemed to swallow him whole. He untangled himself and hopped down with a shiver. The packhouse was usually loud and boisterous by this time, but Zane stood still for a moment and listened.

He could hear the pitter-patter of the rain against the roof, the distant rumble of thunder and soft whispers although he couldn't make out the words.

Little Zane tiptoed down the dark hallway and peered over the railing above the stairs. He could see his mother's long brown hair pulled together in a tight braid down her back. She was facing the other way, whispering urgently to someone he couldn't see.

"I don't think there is anything to fear. We deal with rogues all the time, but Ben says this feels different."

"I wouldn't worry too much about it, Aileen." He heard someone whisper back. "As you said, you don't think there is anything to fear. Rogues plague every pack." He didn't recognize the voice.

"Eavesdropping when you shouldn't be,  my boy?" His grandmother's fingers wrapped around his arms as she gave him a gentle squeeze. Her scent washed over him, summery and warm. He always felt comfortable in her presence. 

She gave him a kind smile and a subtle wink before she called out to his mother. "We have little ears."

Zane felt the smallest twinge of frustration. Why couldn't they tell him what was going on? He was a big boy after all. He was six for crying out loud! He should be learning how to be an Alpha like his dad.

He peered over the railing again and his mother was turning her head. Her deep, green eyes found him in an instant. She rose from her seat, her lips pulling up into an unforgettable smile. It would be her last smile, forever locked in time, frozen and buried deep into Zane's memory. 

It all happened so quickly. Zane was still in his spiderman pajamas, bare feet against the dark carpet. He had just started to move to the stairs when he heard a commotion above the sound of the rain. An empty feeling hit him in the pit of his stomach. He watched his mother's smile fall from her face, a scream of agony leaving her lips. "BEN!" 

He wanted to run to his mother. It was his first instinct, but strong hands were holding him back. His mother was crying. He had to get to her. "Grandma, let me go!" He screamed.

"Hush," She whispered against his ear, wetness touching Zane's face. Was his grandmother crying too?

Zane heard them enter the house.  Zane's grandmother yanked him to the floor so fast he had no time to react. "Keep quiet."

"Get them out!" His mother screamed. Zane was being pulled down the hall. He wanted to break free and save his mother just as his father had done many times before, but his grandmother's eyes pierced his. "Do not try to be a hero, Zane. Your sister depends on us."

Zane's heart was racing in his chest. Thump. Thump. Thump. 

His mother's death was fast. They didn't even let her talk. They snapped her neck in one swift motion and let her lifeless body fall to the floor with a dull thud. Zane watched her long braid fall gracefully beside her. Before he could so much as breathe, his grandmother was pulling him further down the hall. Laughter echoing around them.

Silent tears fell from Zane's cheeks, a deep hole forming within his chest.

"Be brave, love. We have a long way to go." His grandmother's words were barely audible as she opened the door to Emma's nursery. 

"It's just us three, Grandma," Zane whispered back, his throat raw. "It's just us three now."