Rengoku Kyojuro Oneshots (Request Open)

Self Hate

A/N: BE ADVISED- THIS CHAPTER WILL CONTAIN TRIGGERING CONTENTS THAT RELATE TO DEPRESSION, SUICIDE, AND MAYBE MORE! IF YOU AREN'T OKAY WITH READING THAT, THEN DO NOT READ THIS CHAPTER! Hope you enjoy~!!

Music played in the background, the quiet hums of the radio helping to drown out all the commotion that surrounded you. Your eyes gazed out the window, the sight of the city below you leaving you breathless in its beauty. The lights outlined the sky, the clouds shaped peacefully around the bright moon. You loved the spectacular sight more than anything... but your parents had forbade you from ever seeing it alone, and so the gave you your own personal body guard. They wanted to make sure you didn't try anything stupid that could cost you your life... but honestly, it didn't matter at all to you. Whether you lived or died, what difference would it make in the world? What point was there to life for a useless nobody like you?

You shook away the thoughts, quiet footsteps approaching you as your sharp glare landed on the man you had come to care for deeply. Your eyes immediately softened as you smiled aimlessly towards him, hoping he didn't realize the tainted thoughts that stained your mind day and night.

"(Y/N)-san, your car has arrived. Shall we take our leave from this boring event?" He reflected your smile, his gentle hand stretched towards you in a gentlemanly manner.

"Of course, I was getting quite bored as well." You declared and wrapped your elbow around his, laying your head against his shoulder as he led you towards the elevator that would take you to the bottom floor. You just barely caught the sight of a familiar stare before the doors closed, the man beside you heaving a sigh of relief as you pulled away instantly.

"H-hey! Just because we've left the public eye, doesn't mean you can just pull away from me!" He whined, his arms snaking around you to prevent further escape.

You just rolled your eyes and allowed him to hug your body. It's what your parents would want anyways. You groaned at the thought as the elevator dinged, the doors sliding open to reveal your sweet escape from his grip, running towards the car faster than he could reach out to grab you again.

Before you could open the door however, he pinned you against the car, his hand resting on yours as his toned chest laid against your back. "(Y/N). You're not acting right, and as your body guard and friend, I'm worried."

His words startled you slightly as you gulped from the strange position, your ears turning a bright red as you tried to hide the truth from him. "You're acting out of line, Kyo. Please, let me go." You pleaded, wishing he would give you a heads up before pinning you in such a way.

"Do you wish to tell me what's on your mind, or will you refuse like every other time?"

"I don't understand why you still ask." Was your only response as you felt him move away and open the door for you sadly.

As you got in he sighed deeply, sadness etched into his eyes and body. You didn't understand him at all. He closed the door softly and got into the drivers seat quietly, gazing at you softly through the mirror before looking st the road, beginning to drive. It was quiet, neither of you willing to speak to one another in fear it would make the situation worse than what it already was.

After 30 minutes of riding in the silent car, he finally pulled up to your front door and stopped to let you out. You sighed and opened the door, watching him do the same. Quietly, he walked you to the door but stopped and turned to look at you. Suddenly, he pulled you into a tight hug, your face hitting his chest.

"You won't tell me what's wrong, but just know I'm here." He spoke into your hair, finally releasing you and walking back to the car to park it. You watched him drive off, nibbling on your lip. Once he was out of sight, you walked into the home and made a b-line for your room.