A love and hate kinda story between Sammie and Jimin . A roller coaster ride kind of love story that makes the 8 member group hold on to each other whatever happens!
it's my first ever story that i would be making so please bear with me. Everything...
He walked near me and held my hand. " Can we please talk?" He said again. I just nodded and he lead the way to the living room.
He ask me to sit on the floor and he sit right in front of me. I was looking at him studying his face. He looked so down and tired. He was looking at his fidgeting hands. Then looked up at me. Before he can say a word I started talking.
"Mianhe Oppa!!" I told him. " I am sorry if I yelled at you I was just drunk I know It is not an excuse. I know you were just worried about me and I just took it the wrong. I am so so so sorry Oppa!" I told him. I was already crying my tears falling endlessly.
"I don't like seeing you cry Sammie~ah please stop crying!"He said as he try to wipe away my tears but they just keep on falling. "I'm sorry I just can't help not to cry Oppa." I told him in between sobs.
" I just wanted to know Sammie. Do I still make you feel that you are not wanted?" He asked me. His voice is also breaking and he is just looking at the floor while holding my hands. " I know that at first we had some issues. But I thought we have passed that. I never wanted you to feel unwanted. You know how special you are to me. You know how much I love you right?" He said. I looked at him as he is now wiping his tears he is also crying.
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I was just shocked by the words he is saying. "He loves me??" I asked myself.
"You l-love me?" I asked him
"Of course I love you. You are our princess. You are like my sister. I love you Sammie~ah!" He said looking in my eyes.
I just nodded and tears still flooded my eyes. "He love's me as a SISTER! Don't expect for more Sammie!!".I told myself. But I can't help to feel hurt in the realization that he would never love me more than a sister.
"Ne al-ayo. I love you too Oppa!" I said. I said it with more emotions than it is intended. "I love you so damn much!" I said just to myself. Though I will never be more than a sister.
He then hug me tight as we both cry. " I don't want you mad at me Baby. I am so sorry if i yelled at you. I was just worried because Tae said you drank two bottles of beer. I was so worried I was thinking that something bad might have happened to you because you have been gone for too long!" He explained. "It's okay Oppa I deserve to be yelled at because I made you worry. It would not happen again I promise!" I told him.
He let go of me and wiped my tears from my eyes. " Stop crying baby. Don't cry anymore" He told me. I also wipe the tears from his face. "You too Oppa stop crying. You look ugly when you cry!" I smiled at him. He just laugh at me. "You are no longer mad at me?" He asked.
" I cannot stay mad at you Oppa."I told him. He smiled at me and he held my hand. "Gomawo!" He said.
"Can you sleep with me tonight?" I asked him. "Oh my baby wanted to be cuddled. Yes I would sleep beside you!"He said.
We went to my room and we lay down the bed. He hugged me and I hug him tighter . While hugging him I made a promise to myself that I am letting go of the feelings I have for him. I will no longer entertain this feeling because it hurts so damn much. And I would rather have him as a friend or a brother than not having him in my life at all. " I will treasure this night that I have you in my arms.I love you so much. But I'm letting it go. I am setting my heart free.I will make sure to stop whatever this is. I will move on! Tomorrow will be the day that I will let you go!" I promise myself.
A tear escaped my eyes. Just the thought of not loving him more than a what is expected is hurting me already. My heart is like torn into pieces. But I will make it. I will move on! I can't make him love me if he don't. I just needed to be contented on what he can give.
*******
We were all preparing for our flight for the next day. We went to the agency for some polishing for our concert performance. We also had a meeting with the management about our iterinary for the next leg of our tour. We went back to the dorm very late that night. We just wash up and went to bed.
We have an early flight so we need to sleep early. But someone is knocking at my door. I opened it and saw Suga. I asked him to come in. "Geuge mwoya?" I asked him. "Yeodongsaeng gwaenchanh-a?" He asked. "Naega joh-aibnida!" I told him. "hwagsilhabnikka?" he asked again. " Yes Oppa I am okay" I told him. "I have decided to let go of my feelings for him." I told him honestly.
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"Wae gabjagi?"he ask me while looking at my face. " I don't want to hurt anymore Oppa. I am just hurting myself thinking that he can love me more than a sister!" I told him. " I didn't know that your feelings for him is this deep. I thought it was just a simple crush." He said.
" That is what I thought too Oppa but after seeing him with another girl last night made me realize the true depth of my feelings!" I told him. " I got scared. And I don't like the feeling of pain. And he told me that he love me only like a sister." I said with so much sadness.
"You are still young Sammie~ah. If you want to forget him I will support you. Just focus on your career make yourself busy. Eventually you will forget your feelings for him." He said hugging me. "Nado geuleogil balae Oppa!" I told him
