The Golden God.

Rogue.

You are The Golden God, a rogue living in the kingdom of Larion. You have a long steel dagger and a length of rope. You walk down the city street looking for somewhere to steal from. You look around and see a well dressed couple walking towards you. You think about attacking them but they are heavily guarded by palace guards who keep a close eye on the crowds. You piss all over them. "Excuse me." You say. The woman screams, the man gives you a few gold coins. You make your way back out of the city gates. You piss all over everything you pass. People step around you or simply wipe their feet. Eventually you get to the bridge over the river. A soldier stands there keeping an eye on everyone entering or leaving the city. You approach the soldier, pissing on him. "Good day." You say. The soldier is unmoved by your actions. "You are not welcome here." The soldier says. "But why? I'm just trying to go home. You piss right on his face. "Have you gone mad?" The soldier exclaims. You pull out your steel dagger and shove it into his eye. You keep walking, leaving a trail of blood in your wake. You walk back and eat his piss covered body, and drink his pissy blood. You are a vampire. You have discovered what the Bible was referring to when it said "drink their blood." You have also discovered that you are quite the ladies man. The girls are all over you, whenever you want. You have the pick of the crop. Any girl you want, you can have. You piss all over every woman who approaches you. You live in a small village outside of the city. You live simply, and help the local farmers defend against raiders, bandits and the like. You piss on them all a lot. One night you are returning home, a bottle of alcohol in your hand. You walk down the village street and hear yelling and screaming. You walk up to a nearby window and hear a woman screaming. You climb through the window and piss on the woman. She looks shocked. "I'm going to kill you." She says. "Do it." You piss on her face. She likes it. She pulls a knife on you. "I'd never kill the innocent. But if I can't have him, then you're next." You piss on her until she starts to choke. You let her die. You live here for years. Eventually you have children with a local woman. You live happily ever after. The End. That is, until you piss on the children until they die. You eat the children.And your wife. Delicious.