Today I started my day early. I laid in bed and fought with myself about if I wanted to get up or not. But I started thinking yo myself and I get to see J today so I got excited and got up. I don't know exactly what time I left for work.
I get to work and I smoke me a blunt as usual and now I'm ready to start my day. I walk in to work only to be disappointed. The night shift really doesn't do a good job. They half ass everything. So not only am I doin my job but I'm doing someone's else's job too. Other then that my day at work was ok..
At this point I'm kind of upset. J promised me he would come over today. And it's 9 pm. Sometimes I just want to be around j or have him in my presence. I wanna go riding around with him or jus hang out somewhere else other then the house.
I really like J.
7/16 j told me he loved me. And again today.(7/24)
J once told me he never says things out of emotion and when he says something he mean it and it's been processed through his mind. He calls me baby sometimes when we're just talking it'll slip out . I don't know if I love j but I told him I do. I don't know what love is exactly and I definitely don't know how to love. I know I'll never try to hurt j or tear him down. I don't think he will even let anyone get close to doing that.
Some things about j just make me wonder.
Sometimes I feel like I'm selfish because I just want j all to myself.
Imean What is it that you can't do without me being beside you. ....right
