Wrong Number, Kid

Reality

<<Delilah>>
The letter. Ms. Nancy gave it to me after I got home, but I didn't open it until I was texting the group chat. As we are texting, I open it. I see his name, and skim, but I get the gist of it. I turn my phone off, but it keeps buzzing. I just want everyone to stop. I want everything to stop. I know that Mr. Wilcox said that we may need to testify, but I didn't think it would happen. He has the evidence. There are pictures. He took his own pictures. I will do what it takes, but I don't know if the kids can do it. They are all still so young. I took as much as I could for them, but they still had to go through a lot. It isn't fair.

My phone keeps buzzing, but the ringtone changes. I know that Mr. Parent is texting me personally. I text him back and tell him that everything would become real. He doesn't really know what I talking about, since I don't trust any of them with my past, but he seems to know enough. I keep looking down at the letter, hoping it's just a figure of my imagination, but it's always still there.

I say goodbye to Mr. Parent, then take a closer look at the letter. I'm really just looking for when I have to do this. As I look, I see that it's Friday. This Friday. A lot sooner than I hope. I barely have any time to dread it, so I guess that's a good thing. I don't want to have to see Mr. Atkins ever again. No one really knows everything that he did to me. I was able to spare the kids from it, but I have never said it out loud. I've never had to say it out loud. I don't know if I can.

I can feel my face start to get hot. My breathing starts to speed up. I don't want to cry, but I don't think I have a choice. I feel the first tear fall, then another one, and soon I'm crying, sobbing. I don't know what to do. I have to tell someone since I'm going to need a ride. I also have to let Mr. Stark know that I won't be able to make the internship on Friday. He's probably going to think I'm lying. I can't deal with all of this right now. I just can't.

I start to pace around the room with the letter in my hand. I know I should probably sit down since I almost passed out before, but I can't sit still. I don't realize how loud I'm being until Ms. Nancy knocks on the door. I turn towards her, and just stare. She seems worried, but I don't know how to tell her. I barely know what to tell her. All that I feel I can do is let her read the letter, so I hand it to her. As she reads it, her facial expressions change a lot. I continue to pace until I feel her hand on my arm.

"Delilah," she says softly. "Are you okay?"

I just look at her. How could I possibly be okay? I have to face the person who made my life a living hell for nine years again. I just barely escaped him last week. How will I know he won't pull some stunt? How will I know that I'll be safe? Mr. Atkins was able to stay under the radar for so long. How will I know that I'll help? I start to break down again, not knowing how to react. The only feeling I can actually make out is pure panic.

Ms. Nancy guides me to the bed and has me sit down. She then sits down next to me and pulls me close. We stay here until I pull away. Ms. Nancy just looks at me, seemingly waiting for me to speak.

"I d-don't know what to do," I say. "I k-k-know I have to, but..." I trail off.

"Sweetheart, there will be people there keeping you safe," Ms. Nancy explains. "You will be able to take all the time that you need. I've seen cases in court like this before. I'll be right there the whole time, okay?"

I nod, and give Ms. Nancy a hug. It's the first hug I have given an adult in a very long time. I'm used to comforting the kids, but we all tried to stay away from Mr. Atkins if we could. As we embrace, I have multiple realizations.

"Dang it," I say.

"What?"

"The time that I have to be there means I have to leave school early and miss the internship. I have to call the school and SI to let them know," I explain.