Confused Feeling's ( B X B )

Chapter 56 - Crying Nightmares

The next day came by so quickly the sun was shining through my window my eyes were so red and puffy my pillow was so wet as if i have just been swimming i cried myself to sleep last night i didn't sleep well at all i had nightmares of Jacob him touching me trying to kiss me there was a pain in my heart i scared i would never see my family again but now i am safe thanks to Perth, Blue and my brother but i still can't help but think this is all my fault even when people tell you it isn't your fault but deep down you know you could of done better and know one would of been hurt like Perth was if i had the guts and didn't bring other people into my problems no one would of been hurt now the love of my life has been shot but when you think about i didn't expect Jacob to go this far as to kidnap me and shot my boyfriend but on the other hand i kind of expected it cause his a fucking psycho after my mini rant in my head i made my way to take a shower so i can go and see Perth today.

I headed to the shower and let the hot steamy water run down my body i couldn't be in here to long cause i want to spend time with Perth and see how he is doing once i finally finished my shower and went to get dressed so i could head to the hospital to visit Perth i didn't want to be late cause i promised him i would see him in the morning once i was dressed Blue and Kain slowly started to wake up ' Sorry did i wake you guys' i said they looked so tried which is mostly my fault they haven't slept they must of heard me crying last night they both looked at me i could tell they felt sorry for me " No it's fine why are you dressed this early" Blue asked did he really not know ' I am going to visit Perth this morning like i promised him yesterday' i looked at them waiting for an answer which didn't take them long " We will come with you" they both shouted at the same time which made me laugh i nodded at them and made my way to check my phone.

It was only 7:30 am in the morning i know it was super early but i wanted to be up and ready i could feel my stomach making noises and that's when i knew i needed food i wait until they are both ready then we can go grab so breakfast and some for Perth to while each of them got ready one by one i went over to sort out my hair but when i looked into the mirror i looked completely dead i had red eyes bags under my eyes my skin looked so pale i didn't look my age at all and all of his comes down to one cause one reason JACOB he is gone now but when ever i watch some on TV it reminds me of him or when i close my eyes i see him i can't even sleep and his is all his fault i couldn't hold it in anymore the tears fell from my eyes my legs gave way and now i was on the floor Kain came rushing to me while Blue was in the shower " Ken what's wrong" he asked me but i didn't know how to answer it might sound stupid if i tell him but i need to tell someone.

I took a deep breath before i told Kain what was wrong ' I hate the way i look Kain my body is bruises on my body that are from his my eyes are all red and have bags under there cause i can't sleep without seeing his faces when i close my eyes he is still messy with me and i want it to stop please make it stop' i said crying into my brothers chest i could tell he didn't know what to do but he hugged me back and " Told me he i here for me and everything is going to be okay" which was hard for me to believe but i just nodded and hugged him tighter it didn't take long for Blue to come out of the shower looking over and wondering what was going on Ken quickly got up and dried his eyes hurry up and get dressed so we can go get some breakfast his brother looked at him he could see his brother was hiding his emotions from his best friend.

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