Sunshine

Little Foxes

Davis stared in the mirror at his reflection, his hair was getting long again and maybe this time he'd let it grow out. His dark brown hair had a natural waviness to it when short and he had learnt by looking at his dad'd hair type, which he shared, that when left to grow a little longer it was curly and a look he might actually like. He had been groomed since he was a young child to always have short hair as longer hair was unkempt and not a preferred look, now he wondered what look he'd prefer. He'd been performing these mini experiments in the third week that he had been here when Erin had asked what he would like for breakfast and he had immediately recited that he'd like sunny-side up eggs with a side of hash browns and bacon, the words had been about to leave his lips when he stopped. It was usually what his mother ordered for him but he couldn't really remember ever eating it and digging in with the same gusto that he younger siblings had when presented with chicken nuggets.

No Davis had decided to branch out and find out what he liked for himself, he found out that he really preferred scrambled eggs to all other types of eggs and that he had an extreme disliking for all types of pies-it most definitely had to do with the pastry. He had found out that while he liked coffee he much preferred a cup of Rooibos tea as it helped to settle his nerves and warm him from the inside out. He actually did like the colour green, just the darker shades like Emerald and Jade versus the mint green palette of the colour. He kept searching and trying to define which parts of him were real, which parts of his personality and his likes and dislikes were actually his and not as a result of what other people wanted him to be.

Today was another day he would be spending in the company of Erin, the spitfire redhead who had made him smile more genuinely in one day than he had for a long few years. He caught himself smiling again, he felt more like himself here in Rook, like he could actually breathe. And Erin had served to be a very important friend over the past few week, not that she wasn't gorgeous, with her green eyes and red hair she reminded him vaguely of the Greek goddess Persephone but unlike her he would not be the darkness to drag her down. He very much liked Erin but he couldn't go there, not with her. It simply wouldn't be fair to her to saddle her with his intimacy and trust issues, not withstanding his nightmares and memories. No Erin was much safer being his friend, hopefully that way he wouldn't lose her and even if he did it would hurt just slightly less to lose a genuine friend than to lose a genuine friend and love at the same time.

The fair in the next town over was happening this weekend, and after a long week of working Monday to Sunday he finally had a weekend off, his boss -Andy- had actually told him not to work so hard but the words Judy had told him didn't just sit in his clothes and they had done more damage to him than he would of liked. She had spoken of healing like a path of fire and of being hurt at the hands of a bad man, it sounded like she had been through the ringer and he had had to work himself haggard just to stop from taking her up on her offer to unburden himself to her. His body felt lighter than it had in a while and he realized that she was right, keeping it in would harm him more in the long run but while his body was physically ready and yearning to do so his mind was at war with itself, although nothing new he was always at war with himself. He felt jaded and weary and his past experiences had done nothing but instill a further sense of weariness and distrust in people, if his own father and his best friend didn't believe him... why would Judy? Why would some stranger believe over those who he loved the most? Would she see him as something broken that needed fixing or would she think he was lying like everybody else?

A soft knocking sounded from the front door, he opened it and it was Preston, he had a sheepish smile on his face as he explained that his nephew needed him to come out because of a family emergency and that Judy wasn't going with, he had simply asked Davis to have dinner with her for the two days in which he wouldn't be there. Davis had agreed, but he knew there was more to this than what met the eye, he was questioning why Preston would be leaving on such short notice, then again he was questioning everything in life lately. Questions swirling and changing, impacting every piece of his life as he unpacked who he was part and parcel, with each pain staking day and while the pain felt less now that he was away from home the sense of urgency in what he was doing kept building back up. He had a month and a half left, a month and a half left to decide what he was going to do when he went back home.