A Home For Me And You

Change

Forth POV

It's been a month since Beam moved to Bangkok. I try to live like other normal people, eating, working, cleaning the house, and socializing. But no matter how many times I tried, it felt like a part of my life was missing. I feel empty every time I go home and no one welcomes me at home. If I miss Beam so much, I'll sleep in his room. Being in a place where I can smell Beam makes me calm. Like he was with me. Now I even miss the nagging.

That jerk

"What are you doing? Haven't gone home yet?" Lam asked when he entered the office.

"Um ... I want to finish this report for a while" I said.

"Ckckck ..."

Lam suddenly pressed the power button. I was astonished when my computer was totally dead.

"What are you doing jerk!" I shouted while trying to pull Lam.

"Oh come on. Why are you working overtime to make a small theft report? I'll help you make it later" he promised, trying to avoid me.

"Let's drink," he invited.

I stopped chasing Lam and looked at him annoyed. He smiled broadly at me. I know I can't be mad at him.

"Ok"

Lam grinned at my answer. I took my jacket and walked with him to the bar near the police station. Not many people there because tomorrow is still a work day.

"You lost a child but why does it look like you lost your wife" joked Lam, pouring beer into my glass

"Because it feels like it. He is my only family. Losing it is like losing half of my life. The house feels no longer the same" I replied while drinking my beer

"So that's the reason why you try to drown yourself with work? Because you're lonely?" The temptation

I nodded at the question. Lam sighed and drank the beer.

"I even heard you wanted to move to Bangkok," he said in disbelief. I just smiled faintly.

"You know what you look like?" He asked of course without me answering he would answer it

"Like an ex-girlfriend who can't let go of her ex-boyfriend," Lam said without waiting for my answer. I can only laugh.

"Let go of him and live as you wish. Maybe this is good for him and you"

I looked at Lam closely. Like what I want? I stared at the entrance. If I can do what I want, Beam is now with me, not in Bangkok. He is the only family I want to have. 13 years with him is the best time of my life. But of course Lam is right. My separation from Beam is the best. Beam deserves the best.

"Go out and then get married, and have your own child"

I shook my head at Lam's advice.

****

I returned home at 11 after delivering a heavily drunk Lam to his house. I cleaned myself and changed clothes, then took a beer in the refrigerator, and returned to my room. I took a gift from Beam and sat on the balcony. It's been a month so I can read it as he wants.

"What is this?" I laughed when I saw a shaving machine.

"So you look even more handsome" Write Beam on a stick note that he sticks on the shaving machine. I took a picture of the gift and sent the photo to Beam. Me and Beam are still communicating through cyberspace. I try not to bother him too much, like not calling him too often. I know he is busy preparing for college. I just want to know the situation and occasionally hear his complaints.