By The Way

Chapter 38

At lunch, I had my usual French lesson with Noah. I told him about what had happened in Art and that I needed some time away from everything. He looked at me with confusion written across his face.

"Nat, what are you talking about?"

"I'm going on a vacation. Somewhere warm. And pretty. I just wanted to let you know."

"You're leaving New York? For how long?"

"I don't know," I admitted.

"I wish you would stay," he said.

"I know, I just can't. There's so much that's happened, and I need a break."

"I feel like you're keeping something from me. I don't want you to keep secrets from me."

"My entire life is about keeping secrets," I snapped.

"I'll give you a break," he said slowly, "Call me when you want to talk."

I nodded without saying anything. I was afraid it would come out wrong.

"And Natalie? Please don't leave without saying goodbye."

He ended the call, and I put my head down on the table. I felt a hand on my back, and I knew right away who it was.

"Jameson, I'm in a mood. You might want to sit somewhere else."

He didn't leave which made me feel a little better. I wanted to just forget about everything though. I wanted to start over.

By the time school ended, I was tired and angry for no reason. Elizabeth walked me home and tried to ask me about my day, but I shut her down. I trudged up the stairs and started packing. I grabbed my IDs and passports and tucked them into a secret pocket of my bag.

"Nat, are you okay?" Neal called as he walked into the apartment.

"Please, I'm in a mood," I warned him from the couch where I was sitting with my nose in a book.

"What kind of mood?"

"The kind where I get really snippy and tired and angry for no reason."

He sat beside me and put an arm around my shoulder. I tensed without thinking which made him pull away.

"Natalie, what is it?"

"I'm going away for a little bit," I admitted.

His eyes widened so much that I thought they might pop out of his head. He pulled my head into his chest where I could listen to his heartbeat. I felt it get faster as he thought about me leaving.

It slowed to steady again, and I heard his voice rumble from his chest, "I really don't want you to go. Please stay."

"I can't," I mumbled sleepily.

"I know."

I woke up in my bed early the next morning. I grabbed my suitcase and scribbled out a note:

I'll be back eventually. I love you Neal. Always have, always will.

Your baby sister,

Natalie Elaine

I ran into June on my way out.

"Just where are you going?" she asked with her hands on her hips.

"I have to leave."

"Natalie-"

"Don't try to talk me out of this. I can't stay here."

"I was just going to tell you to be safe. Take care of yourself."

"Yes ma'am," I let her give me a hug.

I glanced over my shoulder as I left and saw her wave to me. I walked a few blocks before I called a taxi to the airport.

I got onto the plane without any problems, but I didn't breathe properly until we landed. I was waiting for it to blow up. It never did, thankfully.

"Charlotte Moreau," I said as I handed money to my new landlord.

"Enjoy your stay."

I smiled my signature Caffrey smile and walked into the house. I emptied my suitcase and set up a couple of photographs in the armoire where nobody would see them. My eyes flicked from picture to picture, memorizing their smiles.

"I love you," I whispered as I closed the doors.