New family + New state + Gang leader ME = Deep S*!#

Chapter 22: Left or Right?

Last chapter, tell if you want a epilouge ? yeah hope you like and not edited.

P.S tell me if it doesn't make sense.

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As I try look at the sight in front of me I wince since at the slightest movement of my head, pain erupts, going from my toes all the way up to my hazy and confused mind. I see that Emily's on the ground unconscious while I'm lying on my stomach, biting back the pain of my broken ribs as I lie on them with the addition of taking the little breaths I need to survive the burning room. My body feels like I'm being hung in mid-air by these strings or maybe hooks which are connected to my skin which feels like my skin is being ripped off slowly from my body. Broken bones feel like that. I think of something else rather than the pain I feel since I most likely won’t be feeling anything in a few seconds. I think about all the things I'm going to miss.

Rosie...

I'm going to miss her first day in kindy, her first crush, her first date, her first kiss, her first heartbreak, her first love, her last love, when she gets married, her first child and so much more. My mind moves onto Benji, and how I'll miss his firsts and lasts just like Rosie. Slowly my mind shifts to all my loved ones, yet I haven't thought about the one person who I know I will miss the most (other than Rosie that is.) As my body starts to numb as my mind shifts to no one other than the one with my heart Reed...

I'm going to regret not going on a date with him, not being able to kiss him again, not being able to hold him in my arms without embarrassment. Yet I know I have a lot that I don't regret, like going to live with Rita since I wouldn't have learned that having a mother figure is what I needed...what everyone's needs.

Jess...The shy girl who was in love with her best friend; Jessie...Who I loved like a brother; Wes...Who I hardly got to talk to and won't ever get to know; Cas...who was so much more than I thought he was, or Harry, Lily and Chad who I knew would in the end be happy away from Jacks control.

My gang...

I also don't regret making my gang, since I meet and loved each and every one that came and left.  I wouldn't have known Tazzy, my brother from another mother who I met and took home that rainy stormy night his mother died, or Tara my other half who had run away from home as her parents we're controlling, wanting her to marry a thirty-five year old male at the age of 15, or Kasey when I drove past the grocery store on my way to her house to see a girl who sat in the back of the ambulance truck looking into a distance without any kind of emotion written on her young and pale face. Or when I met Judy who was beaten by the blood reds because they could, or Carter who stole for a little bit of food, or Mandy who had been kicked out of home because she was pregnant even though they ignored the reason behind why she became pregnant or Shawty who was kicked down and abused by those who were supposed to love her and Nita who became a stripper because she needed to look after her siblings as her parents couldn't and Mike who ended up in the gang because of Leon, my brother who looked out for him when no one would or TJ, my ex whose so strong yet so sensitive.

No I don't regret anything. Not one single thing... I close my eyes for what feels like the last time, leaving my mind to wander as the pain in my body goes away, leaving it feel light like a feather as I'm shoved into darkness.

Rita's P.O.V

I look outside once again, in hopes of seeing my boys and girls return safely yet I know it's in vain. I've been waiting for days now but it feels like years since I last saw any of my absent kids. Harry and Lily have been here with me as I wait patiently for them to return. Derek has been helping around the house. We've thrown nearly everything away which I don't mind since I think it may be time for a new look and a new start. Jess and Jessie have been glued to each other’s side ever since Reed left to go after Kara who went to get Benji and the little ones back. They cook dinner when I can't they make sure I eat when I don't want too and Wes? Well he's been angry ever since he came home and the house was a wreck. He feels like he could have done something to stop it even though I know he couldn't have. My husband left, off to who knows where, saying he couldn't handle having a gang leader in the house, little does he know his son is one too, saying it was either him of Kara and I choose Kara obviously. You may think why, and it’s because Kara's become a part of the family, of my children and well I will always pick my children over a lover any day, plus he's never been around much since the boys have been growing up, never having a father son moment, weird right since he lived in the house since they all came home from the hospital. Judy has been quiet as of late yet I know that she's just worried. Mandy's been in a state just like mine since she's waiting for her son, Elliot to return to her safely. Kasey has been living with her father but they still come over every once in a while and he's a very nice man to say the least, handsome too. Oh well, let’s not think about that right at this moment. I sigh as I will my body to move away from the window yet I'm stopped as I see cars and bikes are coming my way and lots of them. Shakily I step away from the window, happy.