Firewind

Chapter 28-Kathra

I patted Scymitar on the head and headed out the door, hanging my head low. I can't believe Althaea left. I kicked the sand in frustration. I would go with her in a heartbeat if I wasn't already trying to find Mei. I wanted to see the world. I wanted to adventure with a touch of danger instead of going right back to my everyday routine at the Inn. I wanted to take a risk for once in my life instead of having everything so carefully planned. I wanted a little chaos to shake the barriers of my comfort zone.

Scymitar randomly lifted up his head and then dashed off into the oasis. He came back trotting proudly with Enialis and Althaea at his heels.

"Look who I found!" he exclaimed running around about our heels like an excited puppy.

"Who'd you find, Scym?" Zander asked, rubbing sleep from his eyes and approaching the four of us. "I didn't know anyone was missing."

"You didn't leave?" I asked Althaea, relief flooding over me.

"You were going to leave?" Enialis asked angrily.

At the same time, Zander exclaimed: "Without saying anything! I thought we were all friends and that we could trust everyone!"

Stor walked up mid-conversation with his eyebrows raised: "Who's friends?"

Althaea looked very overwhelmed with everyone pummeling her with so many questions. She looked down and kept trying to say something as the boys talked over each other.

"Stop talking!" I yelled over them. "How about you all settle down, we go find a shaded spot to sit down and Althaea can explain herself without interruption."

Enialis still looked angry but Zander just looked mildly upset and disappointed. Stor just shrugged as we all sat down under a bunch of palms near the edge of the lake. We all looked to Althaea expectantly, waiting for her to explain herself.

"Well... umm," she started, glancing to me for support. "I was going to head east by myself. Without telling anyone."

"Why?" Zander asked.

"I need to go to the Vard to find out some things. I don't know what my future holds and I didn't want to ask you guys to come with me, especially if it's dangerous. I don't need any of you risking your lives for a total stranger."

"But you aren't a stranger anymore," Zander said. "You saved my life and for that, I know I can trust you. Of course I'll go with you."

"Oh, no it's ok you really don't have to come," Althaea protested.

I'm coming tooo! Scymitar exclaimed.

"Kathra you should go with them too," Stor said glancing at me.

"What? Why? I thought-" my uncle cut me off.

"I can find your sister faster if I don't have to worry about you. Besides they are heading back in the direction of the Inn. Your Madara is probably worried sick!"

"You think I'll slow you down? You haven't even given me the chance!" I shot back at him angrily. "All you do is build me up and say I can do anything if I just put my mind to it and then you don't even let me try to do it! I can take care of myself and I'm old enough to make my decisions. Why can't I go with you?"

At this point, Zander, Althaea and Enialis were trying to avoid looking at us. Althaea looked like she wanted the earth to split and swallow her whole to get out of this uncomfortable situation. My Okur didn't answer me.

"Why can't I go with you?" I asked again. "She's my sister."

"Because I told your father I would bring at least one of his daughters back. And if I can't do either I'd never forgive myself. It's not always about you, Kathra."

And that last remark had hit its mark. He didn't even realize what he had said until he saw me wiping the tears from my eyes and running to the hut. I slammed the door behind me. The tears flowed for a few seconds before they burned out and were replaced with anger.

Selfish? Selfish? He thinks I'm selfish. All I've been is selfless, my whole life it's always been about what Mei needs or what my mother demands or what my father asks. I have never gotten what I wanted. I wanted to go to the center continent and go to school there to become a Healer. But my mother shut that down pretty quickly even though I was brilliant and my childhood instructors also strongly suggested that I do so. My father tried to convince my mom. I remember that day when they had gone into their room and I heard whispers at first that soon turned to shouts. My father came out and shrugged angrily. All he could say was:

"You know your mother," with a little half-hearted laugh.

That was the last time I ever asked my parents for permission for anything. That was also the worst birthday ever. The day I turned 16. That day my parents had dashed my only hopes of ever seeing some other part of Usnae Ari. But when Mei asked to learn to dance, my mother didn't hesitate to get a private dance instructor that had to ride to Aniath and stay the weekend every week so she could learn to dance.

And she quit them after 2 weeks after my mother had spent a small fortune on her dancing lessons. My Madara didn't even get mad.

I was always second when it came to Mei except in age. She was prettier than me, funny, energetic and spoiled. My mother always told Mei how much she loved her and that she looked beautiful. Madara always complimented her. But never once said I was beautiful or smart or anything.

And now my uncle was telling me that it's not all about me? Who's the one being unfair here. Not me.