So Long And Good Night

Chapter Four (And I'm Going To Change That)

I walked into school with my earphones in and I was listening to paramore when someone walked into me. That caused me to fall (out boy) over and land on the person and curse very loudly. I looked down and saw that I had landed on Frank. I got up and offered my hand to him, which he took and got up himself.
“

You like Green Day?” He asked me. I looked down and saw that I was wearing my Green Day t-shirt.
“How could I not.” I smiled at him and plugged my earphones back in and started playing the Riot! album. “Hey umm... I’m meeting Gerard and Mikey under the bleachers at break or whatever you call it here to tell them something they wanted to know last night, wanna come with?” I asked him. He looked a bit confused at first.
“Why were you talking with Gerard and Mikey last night. It looks like you hate them?” He asked.
“Oh yeah I do hate them, Gerard seems okay though, just Mikey I hate. And to answer your first question. Me and my dad had our neighbours round for tea so we could ‘get to know them better’, as he put it. Turns out they’re my neighbours.” I explained. He nodded slowly and then looked up at me.
“Sure I’ll meet you there. Wait you said you and your dad, what about your m-” I cut him off before he could finish.
“That is what I’m explaining to them.”
“What the fuck is she doing here?” I heard Mikey shout from across the hallway.
“And that’s my cue. I’ll see you later.” I walked off while flipping off Mikey.
Lessons were the same as yesterday. Boring as shit, while me and Mikey pissed each other off when we could, then me and the rest of his group being nice to each other when we were in the same lessons. I was in art, just before lunch break, when Ray started talking to me.
“So Mikey huh?” He leaned over to be closer to me, even though we were sitting next to each other.
“What the fuck do you mean by that” I asked him, then turned towards him, raising my eyebrow.
“He doesn’t just randomly pick on people for no reason you know. Either you pissed him off, or he likes you. And I’d say it’s the second, since you are exactly his type.” He kept facing the front of the room, but still leaning slightly towards me.
“He does not like me.” I turned to face the front of the room, where the teacher was talking about shading or whatever.
“Well then what did you do to piss him off?” He asked, turning to face me, waiting for my answer.
“The day before school started, we ‘met’ outside a shop, then I turned down his offer of showing me around the town because I told my dad I’d be back by six and it was quarter to. So then he walked off calling me a dumb bitch or something then we started insulting each other and shit then the next day I punched him in the face in front of the entire school.” I told him. He just laughed slightly.
“See, he called you a dumb bitch for not taking up on his offer of him showing around the town. You literally did nothing. He likes you.” He tried telling me. I just shook my head at him.
“He really doesn’t.”
“Then why didn’t he punch you back yesterday. I was there as well, remember. He just stood there and held his nose while you walked off. If he didn’t like you then he would have at least tried to punch you back or something.”
“Whatever. Mikey asked me last night and I said I’d explain it today, under the bleachers at lunch break, wanna come with? I mean Gerard and Frank are coming too so you and Bob might as well if you want.” I asked him and watched his reaction. A sort of surprised smile or something.
“So you and Mikey were talking last night?” He questioned me in a suggestive tone. I just rolled my eyes at him.
“Against my will, might I say. I just moved here, remember. So my dad invited our neighbours round for tea, so we could know the people on our street. Turns out Mikey and Gerard are my neighbours. So yes I was talking to Mikey last night, and Gerard, because them and their parents were invited round.” I explained to him, and he just nodded, like Frank did, except he didn’t ask why I didn’t mention my mum, or mom, whatever.
“I’ll meet Bob in the usual place, and I’ll see you there.” He said to me as the bell rang to signal the end of the lesson, and therefore, lunch break. I nodded at him and packed my things, then headed out to the bleachers.
When we were all sat down, I started explaining what Mikey and Gerard wanted to know last night, but starting from the beginning and why they actually wanted to know.
“So, last night, my dad invited our neighbours over for tea or dinner or whatever you call it here I don’t know. Anyway, turns out those two are my neighbours,” I pointed at Gerard and Mikey, “and they saw a picture of me, my mum, my dad, and my brother as they were leaving. Mikey asked where my mum and brother were, so then Gerard saw that was not something I really wanted to talk about right there. So now we’re here, and I’m gonna explain it.
So when I was around 5, my dad found out that my mum was cheating on him with her boss to get promotions and shit, so they got a divorce. My mum moved to somewhere else with my brother, who wanted to come with me and my dad but couldn’t, while me and my dad stayed where we were. My mum took back her maiden name and made my brother take it too. Me and my brother were really close, closer than Gerard and Mikey are. My brother’s called Ryan, and we managed to stay in contact for a few years after him and my mum left, but we just stopped texting each other. We used to text each other all the time, phone each other, facetime each other, anything. He was my only friend that I’ve ever had since I can remember. But one day he just stopped. I was at the skatepark on my own when I got a phone call from this number I’d never seen before. I answered, and then the person asked if I was Phoenix Quinn so I said yes. This person said this. ‘We regret to inform you, but you were the emergency contact for Ryan, who is your brother, we believe.’ I told them he was my brother and asked if he was okay. And then they said words that have haunted me ever since. ‘He was in a car crash, and he didn’t make it out. We’re sorry you can’t be told in person, but your mother is in hospital in critical condition.’” I didn’t realise I had silent tears pouring down my face until I felt someone wrap their arm around my shoulder, and rub my arm. I looked up and saw that it was Ray. I sniffled slightly and wiped the tears from my face. “He’s dead, and I know I have no reason to but, I feel like it’s my fault. If I was able to convince my dad to let my brother stay with us and not my mum, then he would still be here, and he’d be alive.” I brought my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, then rested my chin on them, staring into space while Ray, and now the rest of them, started trying to comfort me. I wiped my tears away, and shook them off me then, because I was already leaning on the bleachers, I leaned back, looking up, and rested my head on the bleachers behind me. “Oh god I’m pathetic, this was years ago. I’m crying over my older brother who died years ago.” I stood up and was leaving when I felt someone behind me. I turned around and saw Mikey walk towards me.
“If you’re gonna give me some smartass comment, save it.” I was cut off by him giving me a hug and rubbing soothing circles on my back and resting his chin on my shoulder.
“I think I’m gonna give you a break from the shit today,” he chuckled to himself and I even felt myself smiling when he pulled back and gave me a look of concern, with his hands still on my shoulders. “But seriously, you can’t just load it on us that your brother died, then walk off and pretend you’re fine. I don’t know what I would do if Gee died in a car crash. And you said that you two were closer than me and him. I don’t care if you hate me, but you’re gonna hang out with us today.”
I sighed, “I don’t hate you, Mikey, I’m just used to people assuming that I’m a bad person, all because of how I dress and the music that I listen to. And the fact I get into fights a lot. So I basically become who people think I am. Also you give really good hugs, you know that right?” We both laughed slightly at the last part.
“Really? Everyone says Ray gives the best hugs out of us. Probably because he actually gives them out more.” He grabbed my hand and dragged me back to the group, while we were both laughing about our small debate over who gives the best hugs out of the group. When we got back though, everyone was looking at us and Ray was the first to say something.
“I thought you two hated each other?” He looked at us two holding hands and I quickly dropped his and rubbed my other arm with it and Ray gave me an ‘I-told-you-so’ look and Mikey had got slightly pink on his cheeks. I rolled my eyes at Ray and said the same thing I said to Mikey, leaving out the part where I said he gives great hugs. I sat back down where I was before I left, and Mikey went back to where he was, which was just left to be opposite of me. I didn’t realise me and Mikey had been looking at each other for a few minutes until Frank spoke to us.
“You two having a telepathic conversation or something? You haven’t spoken to anyone else or looked at anything else since you both got back and sat down again.”
I looked over at Frank, “well damn, you just caught us telepathitcally plotting to murder your ass.” We all started laughing and I even saw Mikey break his normal poker face for a while to laugh.
We all started to get up and leave for our next class when I said I had physics, and turns out Gerard did too. Didn’t realise that yesterday. I was walking with him and was talking to him when he cut me off. “What did you and Mikey really talk about? Earlier, I mean, when you were about to leave and he stopped you.”
I turned my head to face him, “nothing really, I said what I told you all when I got back. How people assume I’m a bad person and shit.” He didn’t look convinced.
“You were gone longer than it took for you to explain that to the rest of us though. What did you say to each other? Really, this time.”
I sighed and looked down, then looked back at Gerard. “He hugged me, then told me ‘I had every right to cry like I did over Ryan because of how close we were’. He also said he wouldn’t know what to do if something like that happened to you.”
“He obviously said more, I mean why would you two both be laughing when you came back if you were talking about your older siblings either being dead or possibly dying unless you’re plotting to murder me as well as Frank.”
I just chuckled at him and looked ahead again. “I just said how he gives really good hugs and all that. Then he said that everyone says they expect it to be Ray. Then he said he didn’t want me to be alone after I'd just told y’all about my dead brother. And according to Ray he likes me” I said the last part quieter so Gerard wouldn’t hear, but he did.
“Ray said that? I mean I can see why, I would.” He said to me, then winked at me. I smacked his arm lightly.
“Gerard!” We both just laughed until we had to stop on our way to our class, and loads of people nearly walked into us. That made me and Gerard stop laughing and give them all death glares, remembering that we practically own the school. Guess I’m already accepted into their group. That would be nice to actually have friends. I turned around to Gerard.
“Hey umm, would you count me as a friend and do you think the others would too? You don’t have to say yes just so you don’t upset me or anything. I completely get it if you were only being nice since I told y’all about Ryan and had a breakdown about it but-”
“Yes we would all consider you a friend. All of us. Even Mikey from what I’ve seen.” I smiled like an absolute idiot, then started blushing slightly when he mentioned that even Mikey would. Something Gerard picked up on quickly. He can read people easily from what I’ve seen so far.
“Why on earth are you blushing- oh my god you like Mikey!” He practically squeals and I put my hand over his mouth and give him a murderous glare.
“I don’t know alright. Maybe I do, maybe I don’t, it’s more likely that I don’t, but he said he’d only stop with being awful for today. So shut the fuck up, and don’t. Say. A. Thing. Got it?” I removed my hand and saw him looking genuinely scared and he nodded quickly. “Good. Now let’s get to class.” Me and Gerard were on our way to physics when someone came up to me. I felt Gerard grab my arm and heard him whisper something in my ear which I didn’t hear.
“‘Sup, Way.” He looked at Gerard, then looked at me, “haven’t seen you around, what’s your name?” He asked while winking at me.
“Fuck off, Urie.” Gerard growled. “C’mon, Phoenix, let’s go.”
“Phoenix hmm?” ‘Urie’ said.
“Yeah, that’s my name, not that you’d need it though.” I said back, turning away with Gerard.
“Aren’t you the one that punched Way’s younger brother in the face yesterday? I know someone who would like you,” ugh god make him go away.
“Does that mean I have another person to punch then? Aside from you obviously,” I shot back at him. He lifted his chin slightly, as if he was thinking.
“No but someone you can punch again. I mean if you want to anyway, he’s already had enough damage done to him already.” I could hear the smugness in his voice. I’ve only punched one person in total since I got in this town. I tensed,grabbed Gerard’s arm, and turned him back around to face the same way as me.
“What did you do to Mikey?” I growled at him. He just chuckled slightly and I noticed us three were the only ones in the hallway. I pinned him against the wall, and held my lower arm against his neck, choking him. “Where is Mikey? I won’t fucking ask again, where is he?” I felt Gerard next to me, and saw him giving Urie a murderous glare as well.
I smirked at him. “You wanna have the honours or shall I?” I looked back at Urie, who had a panic(!)ked face, then looked back at Gerard.
“Well since you’re new, you can have the honours.” I looked at him, nodded, then looked back to Urie, and kneed him right where the sun don’t shine. I removed my arm from his neck and landed a punch right on his left jaw, making him stumble back and hit his head on the wall behind him. I kneed him in the stomach.
“Where is Mikey and what did you do to him?” I asked him again.
“I thought you two hated each other, that’s what it looked like yesterday, so why should you care?” He questioned me back.
I pushed him onto the floor “why does it matter to you that I care or not, where is he and what did you do to him?”
“Phoenix, I think you should leave Urie alone, we skip physics, and we go find Mikey ourselves.” Gerard said, putting a hand on my arm, while he looked at me with concern. I just sighed.
“Fine,” I started walking off, kicking Urie in the stomach as I was.
When we found Mikey, he was in the gym changing rooms, which Gerard had to go into and carry him out. He had bruises on his arms and legs, and a cut on his lip, he had a black eye, and was limping slightly, with Gerard supporting him.
“Oh my god Mikey are you okay? Sorry, dumb question, you’re clearly not. I’ll take you to the nurse.” I was pacing outside before I saw them come out, and there was worry evident in my voice. I took him from Gerard, and put his arm around my shoulder.
“No I’m not going to the nurse. I’m fine, don't worry.” He tried saying, but was coughing badly.
“Mikey you’re not okay, and if you’re not going to the nurse, we’re going to my house. My dad doesn’t care if I leave school early or not, as long as I have a valid reason and he’ll be more than okay with it if it’s to help you right now. Okay? Okay great thanks!” I started walking back to the main school, where I could leave, and sign me and Mikey out.
“Wait, if you go to the school nurse, then she’ll send you and one other person home to look after you. Phoenix, you go with him, and I’ll tell the rest of the group what happened.” I just nodded to Gerard in response, not really paying attention because I was too worried for Mikey, but understanding vaguely what he said.
I was on my way out, with Gerard behind us, when I heard him mutter something like “so much for not liking each other” which made me blush, and apparently Mikey heard too, because I saw him go slightly pink as well out of the corner of my eye. I whipped my head around and looked at Gerard.
“Gerard Way, I can and will crush you!” I heard Mikey snicker quietly and saw Gerard go pink, not realising we’d heard him.
“You wouldn’t.” He said, acting hurt. I only smirked back at him.
“Oh I would. I would and I could.”
“What! First thing Mikey did when I got to him was ask if you were with me because he ‘heard that we both had the same physics’,” He threw his arms up in the air and Mikey blushed even more, “and you practically beat up Urie because he only joked about hurting Mikey, we didn’t even know if he was joking or not!” My turn to blush.
“You beat up Urie?” Mikey asked, amazed. I just shrugged and carried on walking.
“Slightly. It’s nothing compared to what I did back in Britain, trust me.” I just carried on walking with Mikey while he was talking to me but I wasn’t listening to him properly. Not until he said something that I was not expecting to hear. At all.
“I mean, his best buddy is gonna be pissed. And Ryan’s nearly as bad as *us*.”
I stopped walking and tensed.
“Ryan?” My voice cracked when I asked that.
“Yeah. Ryan Ross, Brendon Urie’s best friend.” Gerard said, catching up with me and Mikey.
I felt all the colour drain from my face. “Wait… No no no. But that’s not possible.”
I felt Mikey rub my arm from where his was wrapped around my shoulder, “not everyone called Ryan is your brother Phoenix. I’m sorry.”
“But Ross is my mum’s maiden name.” I looked at him, and tears were welling in my eyes when I saw realisation dawn on his and his brother’s face.
I blinked away the new tears that were forming, and shook my head. “I’m sure it’s a common last name or whatever, I mean, it can’t be him right?”
“Phoenix, what happened isn’t your fault. Okay.” Mikey said.
“He’s right, let’s just get Mikey home, or to your home, whatever. And I’ll tell the guys you went with him.”
I smiled slightly at Gerard, and nodded, breathing in and out. Me and Gerard supported Mikey to the nurse’s office, where we could be sent home.
We got to my house about half an hour later. I shared my earphones with Mikey and let him choose the music, and he picked the American Idiot album.
“Why did Urie even do this to you, might I ask?” I asked when we got into the house, and I started leading him upstairs to the bathroom, where all the first aid stuff was.
“I don’t even know. He just came up to me and started punching and kicking shit out of me from behind.” He just sighed and lowered his head, still managing to somehow keep his poker face intact. I pulled out the rubbing alcohol and cotton pads, sat him down on the rim of the bathtub and knelt down in front of him. I lifted his chin up and put some rubbing alcohol on the cotton pad and brought it up to his face.
“This is gonna sting so, I’m sorry in advance, don’t kill me.” I smiled weakly at him, and I knew my eyes were filled with concern as he hissed in pain while I dabbed the cotton pad at his lip where it’s puffy and was bleeding. I put soothing cream on his bruises and around his eye where it was bruised.
“I think you missed a few bruises, Phoenix.” He said out of nowhere. I just looked up from bandaging his leg how he’d somehow got cut badly.
“Oh yeah, well why don’t you show me where they are and I can treat them.” I put his leg down and picked up a cotton pad without rubbing alcohol on it again, because his lip had started bleeding again. I brought it to his face and had to go quite close, since this cut looked bad. “Hold this to your lip, it’s bleeding again. I need to treat your other bruises and stuff.”
Mikey lifted his t-shirt up so I could see the rest of his bruises and man, there were a lot.
“I’m gonna kill Brendon Urie” I heard Mikey laugh quietly when I said that.
“You know, if we’re supposed to hate each other, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
I looked up to see him watching me treat his injuries, “I don’t want to hate you, you know that right. I’ve never had any friends before ever, except my brother. And he’s dead, or so apparently. I don’t know how to make friends. I’m used to being a bitch to everyone. That includes you tomorrow.”
“You know, I really don’t care that I said I’m gonna hold up with the shittiness towards you for just today. If you’re nice to me, I’m nice to you. Deal?” He held out his hand.
“I’m sorry, I just can’t. I want to, I just can’t. I’m sorry Mikey.” I carried on putting the soothing cream on his torso. I knelt back to where I started, and realising he needed more tape on his eyebrow. I pulled some out and put it where it should be, then took the cotton pad out of his hand and put it in the bin, getting a new one. Just as I was about to put the new one on, he grabbed my wrist.
“Why?” He looked like he was going to break if I wasn’t careful.
I sighed again and looked down, then back at him and sat next to him on the rim of the bath. “I don’t know, okay. I don’t fucking know,” I put my hands next to me, supporting me up. “ I don’t know how to be friends with someone. I don’t know how to keep a friend. All I know is getting judged by the popular people at school, outside school. Getting picked on. I get called ‘too gay looking to be bi’. I get people telling me I’m ‘not bi enough’. I get called names. So all I know is to be a bitch to anyone and everyone. All I can do about it is to not let anyone talk to me first, so they can’t say any shit.” I looked over to Mikey next to me.
“But then they can’t say anything good about you either. They say the shit they say because they don’t know the real you.” He put his hand over mine, and I turned mine around so we were holding hands again and he squeezed my hand. “They can’t know the real you.”
“But you don’t even know the real me.” I said, “no one knew the real me except Ryan.”
“And I’m going to change that.” He smiled sadly at me.

anyway that's the next chapter im a write a few more today