I carry band-aids: steve x loki

farewell

Loki woke not entirely sure whether what happened last night actually happened or if it was another nightmare. There was a storm. A nasty one, and he had thought then that it was Thor. His golden brother daring to come and claim him when he never showed up when Loki needed him the most. His eyes landed on the nightstand and there sat a full glass of water. The Captain. So it actually happened, it seemed.

He groaned as his brain began regaining the memory. Steve was here and Steve insisted something about Thor not being here. Steve saw him whine like a weakling that he was. The Captain saw it all. For a moment Loki felt his face burn from embarrassment, but was there anything Steve hadn't already seen when he found Loki there, beaten to the pulp, barely hanging on, and decided to take in the stray. As humiliating as it sounded, Loki didn't have any pride left to be hurt. Steve seeing him cry last night couldn't possibly harm his ego any more.

Still Loki didn't feel like being seen. Not today (probably not ever.) He'd been stripped out of his glory, reduced to almost — if not utterly — nothing. So no, Steve did not rescue him. The Captain merely made sure Loki lived just so this humiliation lived with him. Death would be... too merciful. He sighed, because he knew he should be angry, should be vengeful and in rage. Thor had wronged him. HYDRA had wronged him. And Steve had wronged him by not giving him a quick exit from his misery. All Loki felt, however, was tiredness. He closed his eyes again. The fire in him long stomped out.

Should've just let me die, he thought. As though Steve could hear him.

~~~

Loki did, however, emerge from his room after the sun almost went all the way up in the sky, indicating that it was almost noon, even though there was barely any difference here when thick treetops blocked out sunlight nearly completely, anyway.

"Morning," said the Captain from behind his book. Whatever it was he was reading. "Well, even though it's... midday. Never took you for a late riser. Coffee?"

Loki greeted back with a sound from his throat, could be a moan, could be a snarl. Though if Steve was as smart as everyone gave him credit for, he would take the hint that Loki did not wish to participate in a conversation. Though Loki did take a cup of coffee sitting on the wooden table opposite from Steve, figuring it was for him. It probably had long run cold, but Loki, already lost his interest and motivation in things, didn't think he could care less if his coffee wasn't warm enough to fit the standard.

"I take it we're not going to take about last night," Steve went on.

Loki halted mid-motion. His shoulders suddenly visibly tense, guarded, before he tried to relax himself and smoother any emotion that might have shown on his face. "Yet you brought it up, regardless." He said, his voice flat. (Loki considered retracting to his room, but, with the lack of pride in his body, he still preferred not looking even more like a coward by running away with his tail between his legs at the mention of a subject he didn't want to talk about. So he took a seat opposite from Steve)

"All right, then." Steve half shrugged. And Loki almost mouthed a thank you. He, instead, took a small sip of his coffee. Indeed, it had turned cold.

They spent the next thirty minutes minding their own business in silence: Steve reading while Loki just... looking out the window at the scene of a bird chirping on a tree. Probably the weirdest living arrangement one could possibly have; world's fallen villain with a mighty hero. Something about that thought sounded funny in Loki's head he had the sudden urge to crack a laugh.

Then something vibrated on the tabletop. Steve's small device in which Midgardian called a phone. Loki eyed him sideway as the Captain picked up his phone, he saw Steve take one look at the screen before his gaze lifted up to find Loki. "Excuse me," he said, then did what he told.