It's still Raining

Chapter 2

Five days had passed and my mom was busy with my dad's funeral, For five days the rain never stopped. All I did was to stay right beside the coffin.

My dad got into an accident he's one of the fishermen who were drowned in the sea during a storm.

Luckily, they found his body on the shore but he wasn't breathing anymore.

Have you heard about the girl who can change the weather? The sunshine girl.

My dad used to say that the sunshine girl once prayed for the sun to show up then after a few minutes the sun started to show up.

I stood in front of my window watching this lonely rain.

I prayed so hard, that the rain would stop but I got nothing. I'm a strong believer in fairy tales and happily ever after.

My dad used to tell me a story about Cinderella and her evil stepmother. When her mom died his dad married another woman and she had two daughters. One day her dad got into an accident and that's when her miserable life starts. That's when little children like me start to fear that stepmother. Now that my dad is not here with me and all I have is my mom I guess this is how my miserable life would start right?

But like Cinderella would I ever meet a prince who would find me and save me from this life? "Astrid! Go to your room, I don't want to see that filthy face of yours." Mom said as she pulled me out from my chair. Everyone's looking at us some didn't seem to mind us they were busy with their gambling. "Dad needs me," I said to her with my tears rolling out from my eyes. "We never needed you, Astrid. I never needed you even your Dad, we had a perfect life and then you came and ruined everything. So don't tell me that he needed someone like you." she shouted those words to me and every word is full of pain, hatred, and grudge.

After that she hit me again, everyone looks at us but none of them told my mom to stop and I stood there hoping that this pain would stop.

So this is life? It's cruel.

"Are you okay, Astrid?" Aling Dina asked me while putting some ice on my bruises. "Yes." And I smiled at her to ease the worriedness from her.

The truth is I was never okay. A ten-year-old kid knows how to pretend, right?

"I'm sorry if I wasn't there." She said while giving me that comfort looks. "It's okay," I said and took the small stick and draw some trees on the sand. I have no one, now. "Ever since dad died my mom is always like that. Maybe she finds comfort and satisfaction while hitting me or beating me. This pain is not enough to ease the pain my mom has." I said while smiling at my drawing. "How could she do this to you?" she said while hugging me though I was smiling my tears keep falling out.

Yeah, How could she do this to me? " Aling Dina, I'll go to my favorite place," I said and left her there.

I have this favorite place where I would always take a nap or where I would calm and try to get my senses back.

While standing there on this big stone and relaxing in this breeze I saw someone. It's a kid walking towards the sea. I didn't mind him he's just going to swim. So I sat and closes my eyes but when I opened it and try to find the kid he was no longer there.

That's when I started to panic so I run towards the water and try to find him.

Luckily, I found him drowning so I swim as fast as I could till' I reached him and bring him to the shore.

And then he spits out all the water that he drank and he looked at me. I don't know what to do so I smiled.

"Thank you." He said while coughing and I helped him to stand. "A-Ahmm, were you trying to kill yourself?" I asked him while looking down. "You think so?" then he stood up and said "I guess second chance isn't that bad. I hope I will see you again." And smiled at me. "No, you won't," I answered him with that and left him there.

  People come and go to our lives. Today would be the funeral of my dad. I never hated color black I just don't like them but today I reconsider that black is the color that I need. Rainbow after the rain? That's not true. Today the rain won't stop even giving a small light from the sky won't show. Even the people here are nothing but a dull figure. All I can hear is my mom crying and every drop of the rain. Now I understand why life is full of cruel things.

Like a sad song full of amazing wonders but behind it a song that carries the true feeling of a person nothing but a sad one. In this world pretending is normal to everyone even a kid knows how to hide the pain of this life, even an old man knows how to hide the truth about this life, even a woman knows how to hide the insecurities in this life and even a man knows how to hide the wonders he has in this life. Now I'm the Great Pretender let them see the innocence that I have but behind it, I know that I'm just a lost soul trap in this body.

While they're burying the coffin I'm just right over there away from them crying and asking why should I lose that one person who gave me the world he has.

After the burial, everyone went home and I'm here with my mom in front of dad's grave. "Sometimes I wonder why it should be him? Why would God took this person away from me? He's the only thing that I have, the man who had given me a chance to live again. Does he know that I'm just a sinful human being and having you was to atone my sins? I hated you. I will always hate the person who was never a daughter to me." She said those words to me while crying. "You were not his daughter but still he accepts you even when I can't. Yes, I was raped by my father and you are the result of it. Ricardo took me and brought me here to start a new life with him. That's why when I look at you all I see is the pain of my past life. I was a bad person but I don't deserve this, I don't deserve a sinful being like you." after that mom left me there while crying.

I thought my mom was just head over heels to dad but the truth is I'm her pain. I can never take away the pain she felt because it had been always me unless I die.