𝘾𝙍𝘼𝙎𝙃𝙄𝙉𝙂 𝙄𝙉𝙏𝙊 𝙔𝙊𝙐 ↣ 𝙊𝙉𝙀 𝘿𝙄𝙍𝙀𝘾𝙏𝙄𝙊𝙉

thirty-four - hey angel

[this chapter will contain smut/mature content/explicit material. it is not necessary to the plot so if these things make you uncomfortable, feel free to skip :) 

BUT the scene at the end is sort of important. there's a cut above where you should start reading to skip the mature content.

okay, sick, that's all plz enjoy this heartbreaking chapter]

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"Let me love you goodbye," Louis begged.

I nodded without hesitation. He put his hands under my thighs, lifting me up. He carried me to my bed and tossed me onto it softly. I laughed weakly.

Louis flipped the light and got back into bed with me. I climbed on top of him. "Only tonight," I whispered.

After everything he and I went though, we deserved one more night.

Louis brushed hair out of my face and pulled me down to kiss him. "Only tonight," he repeated.

We knew our love was hopeless. Of course, we knew. But he was kissing me, and I was kissing him back.

His hands left my cheeks and went to sit on my hips instead. I rocked my hips into his on instinct and he smiled into the kiss, before pulling away a bit.

"You okay?" he checked carefully. I smiled and pulled him back to me. Louis' hands slipped under my shirt to sit on the bare skin of my waist. "Hold on," he said breathlessly.

I pulled away and he sat up and scooted both of us so his back was against the headboard. "Okay, come here, angel."

Angel. That was new.

I kissed him again. His thumbs ran soothingly over my stomach. The scar tissue was sensitive, and having the pads of his thumbs trace over it was something I realized I could get used to.

Having his hands on my skin was something I wanted to be able to get used to. But after tonight, it would probably never happen again.

I broke the kiss suddenly. Louis went tense  underneath me.

"Is everything alright, angel?"

I peeled my shirt off and tossed it aside. When I went to kiss Louis again, though, he squeezed my waist to stop me.

"Lou," I whined.

"Slow down, we've got all night, don't we?" Louis asked. He cocked his head and my lips formed a pouty frown. "I don't want you to feel like you have some sort of obligation to do anything with me tonight. You don't have to do anything you don't want to," he said gently.

And that was important. Louis knew what had happened to me- what had been done to me. It was rough waters and he was treading carefully.

"I want this," I said, "I want you, Lou, please?"

Louis answered my question by pulling me into him for another kiss. His hands dropped from my waist down to my hips, where he pushed me down against him again.

His hips rocked up and mine pushed down. I sighed softly at the contact.

One of his hands left my hip, and started dragging up my side. One of mine was on the back of his neck, and the other was resting on his shoulder.

My mind was racing.

Are my hands in the right spot? Think, where do the girls in movies put their hands when they're making out with someone? Is this all this is?

Did I take my shirt off for no reason?

Oh my god, are we going to have sex?

His hand was suddenly touching the waistband of my bra. I jumped. His hand instantly moved down a bit.