The Lucky One

Chapter 19

Taylor's POV

I sit next to Harry's bed in the hospital. The equipment beeping is a constant thrum in my head. It's my fault he's here. I got him mad and consequently he ran out onto the road and got hit.

I grab his ice cold hand and rub it. "You're freezing," I mutter to him. I stare at his face for a while. The closed eyes and the lips seem all too familiar. His hair that I used to braid as he drifted off seems to float around his head. His cheeks are rosy against his snow white skin. I close my eyes and mouth my prayer. I clasp his hand in both of mine. I open one eye to see if he's staring back. He's not. Of course he's not. His rising chest is the one thing that tells me he's alive.

I lean forward, hoping to smell the familiar smell of him but the hospital took that away too. He's not in his clothes either, just a white gown which I know he'd hate. Very slowly I lean in further and kiss his cheek. "I never stopped loving you. Please wake up." I whisper. Kendall flashes through my mind. "Oh no." I drop his hand and cover my mouth. I can't have said that. I stand up abruptly and walk as fast as I can to the door and exit through it.

I turn out of the room and walk into Kendall and Shreeya with the Doctor.

"Sorry, sorry." I smile nervously at them and push past but Kendall catches my arm.

"Hey, I know you two were- are close and its hard for you too. I have the same pain as you and you can talk to me if you need to." She tells me. This is why she's better than me, I think bitterly.

"Yeah, thanks." I mumble and continue along, half jogging, down the hallway. I feel their eyes on me as I get away

How could I just have told him I loved him?? I ask myself. Because you needed to say it but couldn't because of time and distance and Kendall. This is a way of telling him but not telling him.

Kendall's POV

I watch as Taylor runs away. What has she done? I know it can't be really bad because she gets stressed about the tiniest things. Like how you're better than her, I say in my head. Shut up!

I look and see the Doctors mouth moving but I'm not listening. Shree isn't either, she has her eyes fixed on me. Her eyes penetrate me and she knows something's wrong. The Doctor holds a door open for us and I follow Shreeya into the room.

"Harry," She gasps and rushes to him, leans down and hugs him awkwardly.

I swallow hard and stare at the near blinding light to get the tears out of my eyes. From the moment he ran away that final time, I knew I'd have to end it. I couldn't bear the thought of hugging him or holding his hand or kissing his cheek or whatever other contact there is. I watch Shreeya hold his hand and sit on the chair. She may be 11 but she's so small and acts it too. She's adorable.

"Ken, what's wrong?" She whispers. I stare at her and then the ground. I feel her hand lift my chin up. "What is it?"

"Him," I don't even feel the tear slip down my face but I see it on my fingers when it falls from my face. "It's always him."

Harry's POV

I watch Kendall say that I'm what's wrong. That I'm always what's wrong. I see her cry and half of me melts for her because I hate seeing her cry. The other half is mad and falling apart because of her words. She's not the one being betrayed.

"He," She sniffs. "He always left and came back saying he was sorry and it was a mistake and then he'd leave again as if my feelings expired after a while. As if in a second, I was a stranger again and he wouldn't realise what he was doing to me." I had almost followed Taylor but now I'm glad I didn't. I'm so glad I'm here for her explanation.

"It was like he thought I'd always be there. I let him hold my heart because I trusted him and then he would rip it out and I'd scream and he'd return it like everything was fixed." Tears stream down her face. "He took me for granted sometimes like I was a- a box or something to be obtained and I could never get away because I'm inanimate but he could still leave me out and alone and I couldn't do a thing." She gasps and I see her puffy red eyes and smeared makeup and her shimmering wet cheeks. "I'm going to say it's off. The engagement is off."

My stomach contracts and I feel sick. My head spins and my throat tightens. After everything I can't believe she's just gone. If she loved me enough she would have stayed and believed in me but since she doesn't I guess I'm glad she's gone. I never liked lies so at least she's telling the truth. But a life, a world, a universe without Kendall isn't one I'd like to see. I'd rather die than live out the rest of my days without her. How do I kill myself in this state, whatever it is, how do I do it?

"Kendall no, think how this will destroy him!" Shreeya begs. "You're doing just what you accused him of doing, of not thinking of others and doing what you want-"

"But I know I deserve better. I can't live my life with him being miserable and I know I'm just being the biggest hypocrite but it's what I have to do. Sometimes you have to focus on yourself for once," Her eyes well up again. "God, I'm so sorry for being me and being this way." She turns swiftly and leaves the room. She doesn't even want to be with me in this moment, maybe it's best if she's gone.

Shreeya's still there, staring after her. She comes back to me though and takes my hand. "You're gonna find someone someday who might actually treat you well." And she's right. I already have. The thing is, she'd never take me back because I haven't treated her well.

Shreeya stands up. "I guess I better get to Kendall before she leaves and I don't have a lift. I love you, Dad."

"I love you too. Tell Taylor that, please, and she'll understand." I say out loud but just like no one can see or feel me, she can't hear me either.