Finding the Path// Moey Fanfic

3//

After a lot of assuring I would be fine, I managed to get Cat and Anna to go downstairs. I realized I haven't vlogged for awhile, so I grabbed my vlogging camera and began to record.

"Hey guys," I weakly smiled, not trying to hide the upset tone in my voice. "I know I haven't been vlogging for awhile, and I'm sorry for that. I just haven't had the inspiration lately. I kinda feel like I'm in a rut of some kind, ya know?"

I cleared my throat, and quickly tried to think of something relatable to follow it. "Like I'm in a trench, and it's a tough job to climb out. When I finally do, I just fall back in. And anytime I manage to get out, it just gets deeper and deeper each time. I'm sorry LifeBurry has been so depressing lately. I don't feel like it's right to upload videos with fake laughter and smiles. I know I've been letting a lot of you guys down, and I really hope you'll forgive me. I haven't had the energy or will to record anything. I'm really sorry again."

I released a breath I didn't realize I was holding in, but I continued, "Hopefully, I'll see you guys tomorrow with a brand-new video. Bai." I winked and held up a small peace sign, then stopped filming. After a few moments, the two minute vlog of me ranting was posted. Almost immediately, I had fans sending me their get-well wishes. I felt my lips curve into a small smile at their sweet words. I felt like I had the best subscribers I could hope for.

I sighed once more, and fell back onto my pillow. "You can't go back to the past, Meghan," I scolded to myself. "Move on. You can't change your mind now." I forced my reluctant legs to get up and hobble towards my nightstand. Sitting on the tabletop along with a pair of earbuds and my phone, was an engagement ring. And it wasn't the one Joey gave me.

This one was from Lucas.

He and I dated for a year almost, and he proposed. I said yes, because I believed it would help me move on. But I think it only made my heartache worse.

I could feel myself falling further and further down the trench I had described earlier. I keep digging it deeper, and my encounter with Joey didn't help that feeling fade.

Quickly, I recalled what had happened at the restaurant earlier. I felt stronger when I was facing him. Maybe seeing him in person instead of my mind wasn't as bad as I always thought it would. Maybe I shouldn't fear seeing him...

"Stop Meghan, you're being ridiculous. He was awful to you. Never forgive him." I repeated this to myself over and over, allowing the truth to sink in. I decided I needed a break from everything, so I went downstairs to see Cat.

"Hey, wanna film a video?" I asked her.

"Finally! I never thought you'd pick up that camera again! Don't scare me like that!" Cat looked more relieved than ever.

She gave me a cheerful hug, and I laughed, "Um, we can't film if you're hugging me."

"Sorry." She looked at me again, and she looked more joyful than Chewie on the day I chose him at the animal shelter. In almost no time flat, she set up the camera, tripod, and adjusted the lights. We plopped down on the couch, and brainstormed a few video ideas.

Once we settled on one, we began recording. "Hey guys! Long time no see! But I'm here today with my roomie, Cat!"

"Hey!" She winked at her cue.

"I know I haven't been really active lately, and I'm sorry. But I decided to post today! And today we're going to be playing some Wii U! How 'bout Nintendo Land Luigi's Mansion?"

"Sure! Let's do... Best two out of three. Loser has to do something that the winner comes up with," Cat suggested.

"I like the way you think, my friend." I wiggled my eyebrows at her. She chuckled a little, then started the game. "You'll be the ghost first."