Pest Control ✔

PC │017

【A L V I N】

The first few minutes after that little ordeal were spent with me simply tossing around on the couch trying to get myself to fall asleep - however, that didn't work quite well so I spent a good hour or so scrolling through my phone and, eventually, I ended up falling asleep.

However, it was at the dead of night when I realized that I needed to pee. So, I did what any normal being would do - ignored it for the first few minutes hoping I could just go back to sleep, but, when that didn't go as planned, I made the awful decision to get up and go piss. So, still half-asleep, I crawled out of bed and made my way to the washroom.

After having finished my business, I began making my way back when something tiny and quick scurried away right in front of me. 

I paused.

Normally, I would have been scared, yes. But, this time, for some reason, I was just annoyed. My feet lazily dragged me over to where Lucien was and I gave him a light tap on the shoulder. When he didn't budge, I smacked his shoulder. When that didn't work either, I slapped his cheek.

"What the fuck?" he groaned before opening his eyes and looking up at me in confusion. "Alvin? Is it morning already?"

"There's a cockroach," I rasped lazily. "Kill it for me, please."

"Fuck," he hissed before throwing the sheets of his body lazily and dragging himself out of bed. "Lead the way."

"Aye aye captain," I responded with a yawn before sauntering over to where I had seen it. Luckily, it was still roaming near the same area which meant we had a chance to kill it. Lucien grabbed a book from a nearby table and asked me if I needed it - and when I responded with a no, he attempted to smack the roach with it.

Didn't work. The fucker got away.

I didn't even bother letting him have another go, I let out an annoyed sigh, grabbed the book from him and threw it right on the little shit after which I was pretty sure it had met its untimely end. Thank God for that.

"You killed it," Lucien gasped monotonously from still being half-asleep himself. 

"Yay," I cheered in a dead tone. "I killed one thing for sure and that's my will to live."

And then the door to my bedroom creaked open and out came an oddly active looking Antonio. He eyed us both on suspicion then the book which was still on the floor, "What in God's name is going on here? Why do the two of you look like a pair of zombies?"

"What did you say?" Lucien yawned.

"I said-" Antonio began before letting out a sigh. "Nevermind, you guys should go back to bed. I just came here to get a glass of water."

Lucien and I looked at each other, still in a daze, shared a nod and then made our way back towards the couch. Lucien got onto it first and did it completely wrong - he ended up lying horizontally so there'd be no space for me to get in. 

"Move bitch, I need space too," I grumbled, poking him with my finger as if it would do me any justice. 

"No," Lucien whined. "You can sleep right here, what's the big deal?" 

His words were heavily slurred due to how tired he was and mine were too, so we just sounded like we had had way too much to drink at that point. 

"I'm not in the mood to cuddle, I just murdered a roach," I confessed. "Now move before I kick you, bitch."

"Kick me then, bitch," he fired back, not bothering to open his eyes. 

"Oh you've done it now," I gasped before raising my leg to give him a hard kick on his hip, but because of how tired I was, I ended up falling backwards and landed with a hard smack on the floor beside the couch. 

But, in all honesty, I wasn't even bothered by it. I decided to accept my fate and shut my eyes without any complaint. At that point, I was too tired to even care about any of the roaches that were probably roaming around my body. 

"Are you dumb, stupid or dumb?" Lucien inquired, rolling onto his side and opening just one of his eyes to look over at me. "Are you really going to lay on the floor like a dead body?"

"Yes, what are you going to do about it?" I questioned before rolling onto my side as well and curling up into the shape of a ball. "Now shut the fuck up, I want to sleep."

"The floor looks comfortable, can I join?" he questioned, still clearly not in the right mindset. 

I shrugged in response, "Yolo."

"Nobody says that anymore, shut the fuck up," he groaned in response before slithering onto the floor like a fucking worm and lying down beside me. He let out a satisfied sigh, "Fuck. The floor in your house is really nice."

"The cockroaches agree with you," I yawned in response before peeking over my shoulder to make sure his guard was down - and then, like the boss ass bitch I was born to be, I got up and raced to the couch before occupying the entire area with my balloon-sized self. 

"What the fuck? That's rude, move over and make some space for me," he groaned, sitting upright on the floor. 

"No bitch," I hummed in satisfaction, already welcoming the warmth of the couch. "Sleep on the floor. Princess Diana did it, so can you."

"I'm not Princess Diana, bitch," he responded before getting up and making his way over to the couch. With ease, he pushed me aside and laid back down beside me with a heavy sigh. "Hey, you kn-"

"Shut the fuck up."