Pet | Kylo Ren x Reader | Precious Pet Series | Book 1

As Long As I Remember Who's Wearing the Trousers

You got as far as the foot bridge that crossed to the officers barracks before you were stopped by a hand encircling your upper arm. You knew it was Ren before he forcibly turned you. He looked like he was holding back from delving into your head to read your thoughts. You knew he knew you didn't like to be read.

"You're closed off from me," he murmured.

"You sent me away."

"That wasn't my decision."

You wanted to ask him why he had obeyed Hux's decision, why he hadn't woken you in med bay last night, and why he hadn't come down to med bay this morning. Surely, he had felt you when you woke. He had always been so adamant about keeping you close. Now it seemed as though closeness wasn't a priority anymore.

You licked your dry lips and shook your head. The whole situation stemmed from Hux entering the picture. You didn't know the dynamic between Ren and Hux, but you got the feeling it went beyond simple rivalry.

You stepped closer to Ren and put your hand on his upper arm. "Where were you last night?"

"I was in deep meditation," he replied.

"I couldn't feel you."

He glanced around as his hand slid from your arm. "My quarters."

You followed him to his door and inside his familiar room. Once inside, the pit-table of ashes caught your attention since there was a burnt helmet-mask floating above the gray ash. The closer you got to the table, the more a disturbingly familiar buzzing started behind your eyes.

As you stepped up to the table, you realized that the helmet-mask wasn't floating; it was resting on a plate of transparisteel. The buzzing reached a crescendo as you put out a hand to feel the rough-looking surface of the side of the helmet. Ren stopped you from touching it, and you looked up at him in question.

"What is this?" you asked.

"It's an artifact," he replied. "I use it to focus."

"Whose was it?"

"My grandfather's."

You recoiled from Ren and the helmet as you looked down at it once more. This had been Darth Vader. A Sith lord of such infamy that even you had heard about him before Lor San Tekka had told you about him.

Ren went on, "I claimed it from the Empire."

"You kept it hidden when I stayed here the first time."

"I didn't... I didn't think you'd understand."

You didn't understand it now, truth be told. "Why do you need it?"

"He-- It centers me."

You approached the destroyed helmet again, the buzzing wasn't as overwhelming this time. The helmet was skull-like with its dark eye-sockets and melted mouth-piece. The durasteel on the top of the piece still was smooth. When you finally touched it, you could hear muffled electronic breathing and mechanical filters--could feel how much of him wasn't flesh. There had been much pain contained within.

You almost felt sorry for Darth Vader.

"Do you ever wonder how powerful you could be on the other side?" you asked softly.

"On the light? No. It is the way of weakness and stasis." Ren was behind you, and you could feel his desire to touch you. He wanted to run a hand up your back and cup the base of your skull in his palm.

"But it's got love, doesn't it?"

"It lacks passion, the ability for singular love. It's neutered and cauterized. There is no power. Their peace is false."