Nitty Gritty 🙄😌 , am i ??

A goodmorning ⛅

And finally I woke up in the morning at 4:30. The sky was crystal clear with no clouds, all I could see were those beautiful twinkling stars and the moon of course. I was feeling happy from my insides. I felt light as if someone had taken a load off me.

I had to thank god for this new beginning of my life. I felt lively. I should attend the early morning Pooja at the ghat. And with that thought in my mind, I headed towards the bathroom to freshen up and take a shower.

Came out of the bathroom but still was confused about what to wear🤔🤔.
But then I saw a saree given by my mom.
It was a beautiful green and blue saree which my mom gave me 2 years back as a gift , she brought it for me from Bengal.
So I decided to wear it. I wore it.
And oh my my it looked elegant.
I wore matching earrings. As my hairs were bit of damp, I decided not to tie them up.

And so I was ready to go. Today I was heading to the ghat with new energy in me. I was thinking about the type of music I want to make. Varanasi was a perfect place to take up the inspired.
I had to make up a song which was modernized and yet gave that classical vaala sensation. Varanasi's each and every street had it's own music.
This place had it's own music and story behind it.
I didn't just wanted to make music and get inspiration from here but also I wanted people to feel the story behind that music.

And as usual while walking to the ghat , my head was buzzing with these thoughts. I finally reached at the ghat.
I could spot an ox , 3 dogs and a paditji.
That was all. I was a little taken aback.
I mean man it's the time of sunrise, are you not going to perform the Pooja??
So I took a look at my wrist watch in order to check time.
Oh,  and seems like I was a little bit early.
I mean it was 5 in the morning.
As there was no one around, I decided to have a small conversation with the one and only human present in the scenario i.e. panditji .

"Namaste panditji"
I said in order to initiate a conversation with him
"Namaste beta"
He replied
"Yaha aap Roz aate ho Pooja krne??"
I asked
"Haan, harr subah Bholenath ki Aarti karne aata hu.
Replied panditji
And then panditji and I had a hearty conversation about the history of this temple of lord Shiva and gangaji.
I must tell you he was a good speaker.
Each and every word of his seemed so soulful. I pictured the incidents as he told them to me. Felt as if some movie was going in front of me.
"Abhi Suraj thodi der Mai upar uthega tab Pooja shuru krni hai"
Said panditji
"Kya Mai Shamil ho Sakti hu Pooja Mai , agar aapko koi problem nahi ho to?"
I asked him
"Bilkul beta, ye bhi koi puchne ki baat hai"
Panditji replied.

A few priests came and a group of about 10 people joined us as well. Panditji had a diya with about 10 compartments and all of them were lighted. The Pooja begun. Panditji was worshipping gangaji with that diya the priests were holding incense sticks. The rest of us were just standing with our hands folded.
And then we all heard sound of a sitar.
Panditji started moving the diya in a clockwise motion and after him the priests began moving their incense stick with same movement. They all were so synchronised and perfect. Their movements were complimenting the Sitar. Panditji took a thali in his hands , chanted some mantras and floated a handful of flowers in the gangaji and then the priests did the same . Later on panditji eyed us to do the same.
I went , took handful of flowers and dropped them lightly into the waters of gangaji. It was a heavenly feeling.
I could see the sun rising In front of my eyes, it's golden rays were directly shining on my face and the water that touched my hands run a chill down my spine but I loved that feeling. And on the top of it was the sound of sitar.
It was so perfect. I just felt like giving a big hug to the sitar player after the Pooja.

And then panditji had a little bell In his hand , there was a man with kartaal , another man had a harmonium and ofcourse the sitar player and his sitar.
The sound of this music was heavenly.
Those instruments were perfectly played.
And then prayer was been sung. It was the same voice I'd heard yesterday. The deep , mesmerizing voice. I knew who it was. Shiv- the man with serene face and a dazzling smile.

My heart said, just turn around and watch him play sitar and sing but my brain said it'd be better if I focused on the Pooja for now.
And yet I was constantly thinking about him.
"What is this behaviour"
I said to myself
"Control it , hold back man"
Yet again I tried convincing my ownself who was just dieying to have one look at Shiv.

And all thanks to lord Shiva that the prayers ended. Panditji came to me and gave me prashad. I took it , bowed to the diya and then touched panditji's feet and sought his blessings. And now I was so excited to just turn back and have a look at Shiv. My heart just started beating faster. Slowly I turned around.

And there he was, sitting on a gadda with a sitar in his hands. Prayers were over yet he was playing some light tune over his sitar. At first I was just looking down at the stairs and then slowly I lifted my head. I looked at him. He was so engrossed in his music that he'd no sense of anything going around him.
I kept on staring him until he realised that he's been watched by someone.
He was then done playing his sitar.
He stood up , wore his shoes and headed towards me with a broad smile on his face.

I was still staring at him. He came near and yet I was lost in watching him that I failed to notice that he was standing right in front of me.
"Goodmorning"
He greeted me
I immediately came back to my senses
"Oh you too"
I replied hastily.

Saying so I just was about to run and escape, go back to my hotel.
I mean I'd been such a jerk.
Literally I'd been staring at him.
What'd he think about me now??

But wait what , why can't I run??
I was still standing there.
I all of a sudden realised that I was wearing a saree so it was impossible for me to even walk with grace.

I began walking without looking back.
I was a bit embarrassed by my act.
I hoped that no one noticed me staring at Shiv.

"Mai itna accha to aaj tak kisi Ko nahi laaga ki vo mantramugdh ho jaaye"
Said Shiv
I stopped
My mind said "just keep going" but my feet couldn't move an inch.
Shiv came and stood in front of me.
He smiled at me.
"Arre arre relax, Mai to bss mazak kr Raha tha"
He tried convincing me
But I knew the truth

But instead of being embarrassed , I was looking into his eyes and I was again performing the same act without even being aware of it😌.

"Kaha kho gayi vaapis??"
Shiv asked
And this was it. I have to act normal around him. This cannot continue.
"I'll just go, have my breakfast and then we meet at the hotel for music."
I said
And then I left without even waiting for his reply.
I tried walking as fast as my legs could take me in this saree.
"Ye saree tumpe suit krti hai"
Shiv shouted a lil from behind

I showed him a thumbs up without even turning back.