Dysphoria

01 | Vibes

I hope you enjoyed this chapter :) 

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"She can't teach you in the hospital!" Your hands loosely covered your ears as your mom yelled at you through the phone on speaker. Her voice was strained, getting higher and higher as she screeched. "She has a tumor and this is what you're worried about?" It wasn't a question. It was another disapproving scream. 

"Yeah, how conceited are you dude?" Fifi's voice piped in, making you grit your teeth. She's 22 years old and still baiting you like this at every chance. "I know you love her and all, but her being gone for a bit isn't going to kill you." She didn't know what she was talking about. Not in the slightest.

"I can't go to Karasuno, I know absolutely no one there!"

"We can't drive you back home! We don't have the money! You either go to Karasuno or beg another school to let you in." Your mom's sharp tongue made your lip quiver. She wasn't normally this mean. Her voice used to always be soft, sweet. Now she always has something deceiving hiding behind every word. Fifi and you always blamed dad leaving, but it may be more than that.

"The coaches of Nekoma and Karasuno used to be best friends. Maybe join the volleyball club and you'll get along with them." Mom's voice was getting weaker, telling you she was exhausted. Fifi and you are a handful with the addition of her sister, that must be draining.

"Yeah! You could stand to lose some weight!" Fifi chimes in before a loud smack and then thump follows.

"Sports are supposed to make you feel better, so maybe this will help you get over whats happening at home." Your mom was always able to look on the bright side.

But get over? She talks as if this is a nasty break up that getting active and then undoing all of it with ice cream and crappy TV can just make you numb enough to forget. This isn't like the first time you failed a test in which you went to a soccer park and ate frozen yogurt to feel better before cramming for the next one. Or the time when your lizard died while you were at school because your mom gave her the wrong type of lettuce. This won't be fixed by going to a soccer park or eating half your body weight in frozen treats.

"Yes mom."

"Bye, honey."

"Bye loser!"

Why is this happening? You hate public school. Ever since your first year in middle school when your classmates started calling you 'Girly' instead of 'Y/n'. You hardly even understood why. You did look more like your mom, having almost all her features except her height. You were kinda tall, still growing too. Being around 177 cm in middle school and now over 180 cm in your first year of high school.

Though it seemed that having slightly longer hair and having your mom's feminine features made you look similar enough to your female classmates that you were quickly shut away in school. Ever since that one awful day of school, when you came home with tears in your eyes and your hair tied up with a pink bow you decided you won't attend a public high school since your mom couldn't arrange for private school or home schooling until then.

You thought that was worth the wait. Every day until then seemed like relief and nothing else. Now the serenity has diminished. Uneasiness made itself a home and you could feel it getting comfortable.

Your aunt wasn't the only one growing ill.

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Constantly tugging on the black jacket the dress code forced you to wear, a strained sigh left your lips. You had no idea where you were heading to and you didn't even care that much. Not being in public school has made you forget just how big they are. Walking in, you notice the boy's volleyball manager, Kiyoko. Her hair had a blue tint to it, making her appearance very ethereal for some odd reason.

"You're...Kikoyo Shimizu, right? The manager for the boy's volleyball team?" She nodded, holding a few books in her hands. Her hands moved to push some of her hair back. "This is my first day and I need help getting to class and I was wondering if..."

"You're a first year?"

"Yeah."

"You're in the same class as Kageyama," You gave her a look. Did she expect you to know that person? You quickly looked down, not wanting to be rude. "I'll walk you down there."

"Thank you so much." It felt weird walking beside you. If what you heard was right, she was the beautiful third year manager. Apparently she has almost the entire school fighting for her attention. And here she is...walking you to class. You. The strange new boy she probably thought was a girl like everyone else. Something told you this wasn't going to stay peaceful for long.

Unfortunately, your intuition was on point. Two boys, one taller than the other with a shaved head and the other with a little blonde bit sticking out. Both stood slouched until they saw you standing by Kiyoko. You recognized them from your aunt's house. Those were the two that are the most protective over Kiyoko according to the orange haired boy and the tall one with dark hair who almost always walks with them.

"Who's this?" The shorter one inquired, leaning forward.

"Is she a friend?" The one with the shaved hair spoke out, your mood changing.

"I'm not a girl." It comes out as a whisper, making you kick yourself mentally. Kiyoko and the two boys look up at you. Does no one realize you're nearly five foot eleven? Hardly any girl in this school is that tall here! "I'm a boy, my name's Y/n." The mood seems to shift instantly, the two staring you down.

"What are you doing with Kiyoko?

"You better not try anything!" The two are getting closer and their vibes are getting more and more aggressive, so you decide to very causally run away. You didn't care where. You just wanted to escape.

Running down the hall, you notice how more and more students are entering classrooms. Feeling stressed, you follow after the tall boy with dark hair you've seen walk home. Maybe he was Kageyama? You weren't sure. You just wanted to get away from the two yelling at you and the pretty girl talking to you.

All eyes watched you as you walked in. You weren't familiar to any of them. At least that's what your thinking. As you walk in, two eyes widen in unison. Taking his seat, the boy with dark hair in front of you looks at you.

You're already a bundle of nerves.

"Please introduce yourself."

You could hear, no feel, the hushed concerns the class before you had.

"She's pretty,"

"Kinda tall though, maybe a boy actually,"

"No way!"

Taking a large gulp of air, you begin to speak. "I'm Y/n. My family lives in Tokyo, I moved in with my aunt several months ago to be home schooled," Words began to clog in your throat. "Due to complications," You complimented yourself for the change of words right then. "I'm attending Karasuno." You walked to the only open seat.

Next to the tall boy who seems the most unapproachable of all.