wishes // a CH rusame story

#2

A week.

A week since Russia showed up as America's new roommate. It may sound like a short amount of time, but no, for the American, this week could probably compete with the worst days of his life.

Russia just wouldn't talk.

America went out and met his friends of course, eventually learning that Russia and his previous roommate, Germany, had to change dorms because of a serious problem in the bathroom plumbing. Germany himself got out of his way to actually inform America.

"Russia's not that bad, I promise and he cooks very well." He even added with a slight smirk on the side of his face as he munched on his burger. "I've noticed, and his cooking is really good BUT he never talks or says anything and when he looks at me I always feel like I've done something wrong. He doesn't want me to help either." America sighed, playing with the spoon in his McFlurry.

"That's pretty lucky of you though, he does everything and doesn't even ask for help. Mom wouldn't like that." Belgium snickered, looking at his half brother while laying on Germany. "Germy, I forgot my medication at home, do you have some on you? I think I'm going to have a crisis." He added a bit shakey, not really paying attention to America anymore, who didn't really mind.

He was pretty much lost in thought.

He was just confused overall.

His roommate was just so...so awkwardly silent!

He couldn't figure out if it was better he just did as Russia wanted or if he forced the dialogue.

America could be friends with anyone if he really tried, even with the most enigmatic guy in the entire campus. It was kind of his sixth sense.

He was certain he could at least become somewhat of an acquaintance to the gloomy dude that was Russia.

He would even try right now, at the dorms!

A few hours passed and he came back from McDonalds with his friends. His definition of now was a bit twisted but he had to think of a plan.

He opened the door, hearing the faint sound of the TV.

"Yo Ruski." He fingergunned, looking at the kitchen's table where he saw a note.

America,
I didn't know if you were going to eat here so I made some extra just in case. The plate is covered in foil. I went to get groceries as well. Do not mind about the price.
I'll probably be in my room when you come back.
Goodnight.

America gripped on his own hair with his fingers and stomped over to the couch where he saw the other male asleep in front of a weird documentary.

About.....dolphins?

He couldn't understand that guy! At all! Acting so soft and then pushing other people away! Such a pain in the ass.

Why did he even care that America of all people had something to eat? No one would ever do that!

He was just asking for one talk, anything. America was not the type of people to go well with silence. He would die of boredom if that continued all year!

He grumbled, visibly frustrated and started poking the other's shoulder to wake him up.

During this quiet moment, he could observe the delicate traits over Russia's face. He looked...pretty good when his softened expression like that.

He'd definitely look better with this face on all day.

But he had some deep eye bags under his eyes, and curiosity took over America for a moment, his hand brushing the bangs off the Russian's forehead.

'I really wonder what he's wishing for...It wouldn't hurt to know...right? I'm just being curious.'

America felt some heat going to his fingers as he saw clear words appearing in his mind like if a screen had been put in front of his eyes.

I wish I was dead.

America shook his head for a moment, hitting his temple with his other palm. He probably read that wrong, that couldn't be it.
He never saw something so dark before.

'Shit! Damn curiosity.' He insulted himself before he heard someone gasp. That someone being Russia.

He backed off from the hand, his shoulders slightly trembling. His scared pale blue orbs stared into the other's. "America I told you not to touch me."

"Sorry I just wanted to wake y-" America tried getting in, but Russia's eyebrows twitched and his eyes became terrifying.

"I don't think you understand that I asked you to stay away from me." He stood up from the couch, grunting.

"Come on man, I don't see what the problem is. I just wanna be your friend." The American scratched the back of his head while looking away from the slav. "You already have plenty of friends. You don't need to count me as one. Trust me it's better if you leave me alone."

He'd never believe the guy wanted to be alone. Nobody wants to be alone. America was high on the list to know about that.
He was stuck, it's like he had to do something, he couldn't just live his life after seeing that kind of wish.

It was none of his business but now he knew about it.

"Nobody wants to be alone." America scoffed, his hands going steadily on his hips.

"I do, so please quit trying to small talk me or whatever. You don't need to give me your sympathy America." Russia continued, a quick smile appearing on his lips fading quickly to his usual poker face. "I'm not worth your time."

"What if I think you are?" The American said, his arms now crossed. He pushed the other back to the couch, getting closer to Russia's ear. He was paralysed, he had to push him away but... "What if I want to touch you Russia?" He chuckled, his hand next to the other's shoulder. "What if I want you to touch me?"

America had bet on flirting. Why? He had no idea but it seemed like the easiest way to make someone vulnerable. Especially that guy who nobody ever got close to.

"P-please I don't want anyone getting hurt anymore." His hands were shaking, his whole body was trembling.  Russia closed his eyes, putting one of his hands over his face. "Please go away..."

HOLY SHIT.
America quickly went back to his senses.

What was he doing?! His goal was definitely NOT traumatizing that poor guy.

This was definitely not the way you dealt with PTSDs. Great job, United States of America. What a way to make friends. He heard shuffle and then a loud bang. The door slammed.

He really scared that guy to death didn't he?

He plopped on the couch, looking over at the dolphins happily swimming with each other.

'I'm going to have to care too now...aren't I? That makes too of us I guess.' He desperately thought before sliding the fingers down to his chest.

"Man I want to be a dolphin."

those chapters are kinda all over the place but ay it's supposed to be clear lol
-nem