MY RESOLVE

NINETEEN

MY RESOLVE

AJMAL

"It's been days we left school and I just can't stop myself from thinking about her: her well dented dimpled cheek,her beautiful smile,her eloquence when she speaks,her voice,all of her. Hmmmmm,what do I do if she rejects me? for one,I know I'd be devastated because no woman had ever rejected me but I do the rejection. The fear of it is apprehending. Only the turner of hearts(Muqalibal Quluub)can help me now". I got up from my bed spot,went into the bathroom to perform wudu(ablution),took my musolah(prayer mat)and in worship I went with my istikharah(seeking Allah's councel).

A knock on my door few minutes later awakened me from my thoughts. I checked to see who it was and it was my beautiful damsel of a momma.

"Hey handsome"

"Mom!"

"what? can't a mother appraise her son again?" She asked smiling

"But you know I really don't like praises"

"ok then ugly pumpkin" she said laughing "isn't that preferable?"

I smiled "ok mom,it's almost 10 in the morning and I'm sure you'd have gone to the shop if not for a cogent reason ma,so to what do I owe this visit to my humble abode sweet mother?"

She signalled that I sit while she did same

"oko mi,omo b'oji o ji re. The gentle lion who can kill even with a smile. Since you came back from school,I've seen a beautiful change in you regarding the deen (religion) which I can't stop thanking Allah for because that has been one of my utmost wishes but I noticed that you're not totally happy. This confues me because tasting the sweetness of faith is the most beautiful thing and it radiates all around one. My darling son,what's the problem? Please talk to your mother" She concluded.

How much I love this woman!

"Momma,it isn't that I am not happy,Wollahi(by Allah) I am the happiest man on earth right now. That Allah could still guide me right despite my sins is a testimony ofHis love and all encompassing forgiveness. Ummi(my mother) I am happy,I just have something that I'm thinking about and hoping Allah helps me with"

"Allah will suffice you my son but may I know what it's or who it's" she gave her knowing smirk

"Aameen but who says it's a who?" I asked coyly

"My son,nobody knows the heart troubles of a son like the mother.    who's the girl that has got my son hooked?"

I hesitated before deciding to tell.her,after all.the du'a (praye) of a parent will be answered

"Her name in Rihannah,Ry for short. we were in the same department and she's the most beautiful woman after you though at heart that I know. Her religiosity was what got me and the way she is so totally dependent on Allah. She's been through a lot mom but she still holds tenaciouslu to the rope of Allah and that's the attraction"

"A woman who loves her creator she's then, so have you told her anything?"

"I haven't really because she once hated my guts but eventually we're becoming close but I can't say where I stand with her ummi because she's aware of all my sexual escapades on campus and even calls me a playboy" I finished exasperatedly.

"My son,I want you to know that whatever has been destined to be yours would never be taken away andwhatever hasn't would never come to you. Direct your affairs to Allah and I'll do same while you make effort but whatever the outcome,know that qadar(destiny) would prevail,understood?"

"yes ummi. Thank you for listening. May Allah reward mom"

"You're most welcomed son. Now get off your butt,your food is served in a flask already downstairs. your dad and siblings are all out,so you'd have the house to yourself. stay safe"