first love ~ s.r

~>chapter four

eleanors pov

I couldn't stop myself from fidgeting all day, I was so fucking nervous to tell spencer my feelings for him. I went home that night and talked it all out with Liam; him insisting that we act it all out. Though I appreciated his efforts to help and make me laugh a bit, I was still so nervous. I never really expressed my feelings to anyone before, at least not in this way. I haven't dated, not even in high school. It was always school first and relationships second. It paid off at the time, but now I needed to make up for that lost time. I was so nervous for tonight, I opted for two cups of coffee rather than my usual four. I swear to god Derek looked at me so concerned when I said I was cutting back on my caffeine today, he even put his hand on my forehead; asking 'are you sure you're okay pretty lady?' I just smiled and went back to my desk, hoping he wouldn't pry. 

JJ alerted us all that we had a case and to meet in the briefing room. I almost jumped for joy at the idea that we were actually going out into the field, then I remembered that it meant my plans with spencer would get postponed. I let out a small sigh of relief and also disappointment, as much as I was dreading tonight..I was looking forward to spending some time with him one-on-one. I shoved all of my worries down; it was focus time now. 

I sat down at the round table, opening and looking through the case file in front of me. JJ was waiting at the front for everyone to get seated for the briefing. 

"Okay, we got a bad one guys. Atlanta, Georgia" JJ starts, flashing photos on the screen behind her, "The Parkinsons were targeted at their home late last night. Wendy and Greg Parkinson were both stabbed in their bed, whereas their ten year old daughter was found in her room across the hall, with a pillow over her head. She died from suffocation." 

"Was there any evidence of sexual assault?" I asked

"No, but the unsub did leave a single red rose in bed with the parents." JJ responded, showing the photo of the couple. 

"Could be a sign of remorse, and the lack of sexual assault rules out a sexual sadist." Derek interjected, still looking at his files. 

"It gets even worse, there were five murders in and around the Atlanta area, all families and all left with a red rose where the parents were killed." JJ said, quickly showing a map pinpointing all of the locations that the murders took place. They were all fairly close together. 

"Atlanta PD is waiting for us, wheels up in thirty." Hotch says, dismissing the briefing. We all grabbed our go-bags and headed to the jet. 

-'Atlanta, Georgia-'

We arrived in Atlanta and immediately made our way to greet the local law enforcement. It was all feeling real  right about now, this was first case as profiler..this was it. I smiled to myself as I set down my stuff in the room that they gave us, white and bulletin boards started to fill up with crime photos and notes. Hotch gave me and spencer the task of figuring out victimology and mapping out a geographical profile, while the rest of the team went to talk to families and stake out the scenes. I stood up to look at the crime scene photos, it was the red roses that were stumping me. The families I understood, clearly the unsub was using the families as a surrogate for his own, this was his way of getting revenge of sorts. Why he was getting 'revenge', we still had to figure that out. 

"I can hear the wheels turning in your head from here." Spencer said, standing directly behind me. I turned to face him, smiling slightly. Lately he has been making me feel..nervous. Like I couldn't function when he was in the room. Stupid feelings.

"Well..just the whole red rose thing is stumping me. Like I guess it could be a sign of remorse, but I feel like it's something.." I paused, looking in his eyes. The tension between us was almost suffocating."..more." 

"Follow your instincts Lea." He said, sitting down and pulling out a map. He started drawing on it, looking down at the files in between changing pen colours. I could watch him work forever, it was so mesmerizing. I decided to be useful though and help him. 

Many hours of work later, we finally allowed ourselves to go to our hotel and get some rest. It was a long and difficult day, the red roses were still unknown and the media was storming us with a million questions and theories. JJ was handling it like a badass, but still..the name 'red rose killer' made it sound like a game or a story. This was real life, real people died...we don't need a catchy name to go with it all. By the time we said goodnight and went to our rooms, I was exhausted. Yet something..well someone was keeping me awake. I kept thinking of spencer and what was supposed to happen tonight, I was still running through what I would say to him in my head. 

Spencer, I have feelings for you.

You are all I think about.

I want you..more than I have wanted anyone in my life.

Please tell me you feel the same. 

The idea of him hearing me say those things...it fills me with butterflies and dread. I just..want to tell him how I feel so bad. I turned to flick off the light when I heard a steady knock on my door. Who the fuck is knocking at this hour! 

I huffed and walked over to the door, I opened it to reveal Spencer..oh god. He looked too good right now, this was feeling like a dream. 

"Hey, so you wanted to talk?" Spencer asked, smiling at me and leaning against the door frame. 

Holy fuck, this was happening. 

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Hello my loves!! 

Sorry for the lack of updates, I've been getting ready to move into university soon, so my updates will be less frequent for a bit while I get settled. But I plan to post the last chapter of part one tonight (exciting!!!). Also I suck at writing about the cases soooo sorry about that lol. 

Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, remember to vote and comment! I would love to hear what you guys think!!

xoxoxo forcebond