𝙈𝙖𝙮𝙗𝙚 𝙬𝙚 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙢𝙚𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙩𝙤𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧?

𝐱𝐱𝐱𝐢𝐱

I laughed, I tried laughing so hard as soon as I absorbed what Bright just said. My face heated and I cannot look at him, I feel so shy, but this might be the latest april fool's joke right?

Go Win, tried faking your laughs until you make it. "That was a nice joke P'Bright." I said chuckling, but honestly, I felt like crying.

Why is he doing this to me? I am damned confused at the moment. Why is P'Bright saying this? Did he knew that his words could either break or make me?

He only stared at me, I can feel it from my side. "Win, I'm serious." the sincerity in his voice made me stop laughing.

I looked at him, and I knew that this is not the time to laugh and joked.

I looked down, trying to avoid his gaze, trying to hide my face from him. "Phi please don't stay that." the only thing that I could say. I do not want to have hope in his words.

"Maybe you are confused at the moment. Because you know.... w-were always together." I added. I do not want to have hope and be hurt again in the end.

Maybe P'Bright was being driven by his sudden rush of feelings. What if he's only longing for Navy that he wanted to hit on me?

I couldn't risk myself being hurt again. I do not want to. Especially if he is not sure about what he's feeling.

"I am no longer confused." he sigh that made me glance at him, as he stared at the bright moon above. My eyes widen, what did he mean? "Did you know that I was so confused when you confessed to me?" he glance at me and asked.

I remained silent and let myself listen to him. "I didn't see you, I didn't called, I didn't show myself to you for weeks, trying to find the answer why I'm being confused."

I bite my lower lips, he never knew how sad I was at that time, but I also didn't knew that he became like this before. He suffered because of me.

"I am so preoccupied on looking for the answers that I forgot Navy. She become impatient and left me." he chuckled like he couldn't believe. "Then I realized that even if I look for the answers, I wouldn't find it."

He shook his head beside me. He is smiling, but it was a bitter smile.

I bite my lower lip trying to stop myself from crying. I didn't knew that it will be like this. They broke up because of my feelings confused him, P'Bright was in pain because of me.

"Then I bravely showed myself to you." He lifted his head and smiled at me. "I thought that time, I lost most of the people I care, then I thought of you. I said to myself that I do not want to loose you. So I went to your unit, standing under the rain while I'm battling myself if I should go or not."

Is it funny? How I thought he soaked himself in the rain because of Navy? But it turned out to be because of me.

Tears threaten to fall into my eyes. "You know Win. I am so scared that you might pushed me away again. But I choose to knock on your door, it's funny that I stood there all night under the rainstorm, but I did all of those hoping that we could fix our friendship."

I smiled trying my best not to cry. But me being fragile, I couldn't hold it back.

He moved closer to wipe the single tear that fell into my eyes. He is smiling at me genuinely. "I remember how you look at me that time, you were shocked to see me, and I couldn't think of anything to say, but my break up with Navy."

Even in that state, I never knew that he's still thinking of me. I remembered how he called my name, I even scolded him because I am mad worried.

He sigh and looked back at the moon. "I was happy back then, when you said that we could restart. And at that moment, I found the answer that I'm looking for."