Follow Your Heart (Brittana)

Chapter 14

"Hey Britt!" I said picking up the phone.

"Hey San" she replied a lot less unenthusiastic than me. I shrugged it off.

"What's up?" I asked.

"I need to talk to you about something, but like, in person" she told me.

"Uh sure. When?" I questioned.

"As soon as possible if that's alright" She said and I could tell she's nervous.

"Okay. I can come over now if you like?" I said.

"Yeah that would be good actually" she replied.

XXX

"Britt!" I screamed as she opened the door. Her face immediately softened and she gave me a quick peck before pulling into a hug.

"Hey" she replied as we pulled away from the hug.

"So you wanted to talk to me" I said raising my eyebrows.

"Right, yeah. Come on in" She said leading me into the house and getting noticeably more nervous.

"So what did you want to talk about" I said as we sat down on the couch.

"It's kinda serious" She said looking me in the eyes. "Actually let me rephrase that... it's very serious" she said.

"What the hell does that mean?" I asked suddenly being as nervous as she was.

"I just... it feel like... I need-" She started but I cut her off.

"Brittany you're starting to scare me" I said honestly. I had no idea what she was talking about so naturally my mind went to the worst.

"I just need to say what I need to say, so you're probably gonna be confused but just give me time to explain everything" she said all in one breath.

"Um... okay" I replied a little sceptical.

"I just- I really want this relationship to work which means that it has to be built on honesty, which is something I want" She started

Honesty? What does she mean by honesty? I mean, I've been completely honest with her. Has she not been honest with me?

She took a deep breath and continued "When I was 15 I started to realise that I was gay. I didn't really know what to do. I was staying with my dad at the time and he's a really religious guy so you with that comes the homophobia" I noticed her eyes started to tear up a little. All I wanted to do was hold her in my arms but I couldn't get my body to move. I'm still shocked as to what she means by the whole 'honesty' deal. "I was so scared I didn't know what to do... I- ... I thought I could make it go away" She said now full on crying. "I um... I tried to make it go away... by um... sex" she finally admitted. "I thought that maybe if I could get myself to enjoy it then I wouldn't have to feel like I was failing my Dad"

I just sat there trying to process what she was saying. When she meant sex does that mean with like one person?

"I slept around... with anyone who was willing to" She said as she collapsed into my lap, tears and sobbing overcoming her.

"Shhh Brittany" I said golding her and softly rubbing her back.

I'm still kind of shocked as to what she just told me. I'm torn, on one hand I'm glad she told me, on the other hand, I now know that she has been with so many people while I on the other hand am still a frickin virgin!

"That not all" she said after a few minutes once she'd calmed down. She was still crying

"What?" I said in confusion.

"So um... I- I got pregnant" she mumbled.

"Holy shit" I replied in shock "So you got an abortion?" I asked hesitantly as I already knew the answer.

"Chelsea" was all she said. She had her head down.

What does Chelsea have to do with Brittany getting-

oh...

"Why the hell didn't you tell me? Do you not trust me?" I asked the anger already rising inside me. I took a few steps back and created some distance between us.

"Santana please just let me explain, there's a reason I didn't tell you" she said with pleading eyes. "At the start of last year there was this girl, her name was Harmony" she said as a tear dropped down her face "she was my girlfriend. I loved her. I didn't tell her about Chelsea and when I did she broke up with me because she couldn't accept the fact that I was a mother" She said as she went back to sobbing. "San you mean so much to me and I don't want our relationship to turn out the way Harmony and I's did".

I looked into her eyes and saw right into her. She was practically pleading for me not to be mad at her. She was being so vulnerable with me I couldn't help but feel terrible for snapping at her minutes ago, but I still couldn't shake the whole sleeping around and being a mother thing.

Now I get the whole honesty thing...

"Please say something" She begged.

"Britt" I said looking into her eyes. "It's my turn to be honest with you" I started. Her face went pale. "I care about you so much and I don't want to loose you" Her face immediately relaxed and a small smile crept its way to her face. "Can... can you just give me some time to process things?" I asked.

"Of course" she said "I understand... you know, if you want a break or something-" she said but I quickly cut her off.

"No!" I quickly shouted "I just mean, I just need some time to think. I know were kinda already taking things slow but for the next few days can we just take thing even slower?"

"I... I can do that" she said with a tiny smile.

I leant over and gave her a chaste kiss on her lips. I felt terrible when I tasted salt from her tears, But I knew we'd be fine.