1D and 5SOS BROMANCE one shots

I'm flesh and bones (Ot4)

Oh my god Calum's 19 ew.

Jk. Love you puppy face!

This is a result from my fight with my cousin (brother). He keeps making fun of Calum and it's getting on my nerves and it actually makes me sad.

Like, I know he doesn't actually meant to say it. Like, y'know when your brother found out you like someone and he teases him to make you feel embarrassed about it? Yeah, it's kinda like that.

But it makes me think, how much people actually think that about Calum? How much people actually Cal's all those bad things he said to me? And if it hurts me so much to hear my brother make fun of Calum, how much does it hurt him to actually hear people say it? And it really makes me sad thinking about it.

So yeah, Happy birthday Calum. You're really amazing. I adore and cherish your existence, and I bet so does all the others. I love you pup. You're a blessing for me x

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Sometimes, Calum wish that he's all his bandmates said he is.

He wish he was funny.

He wish he was cute.

He wish he has an extravagant personality.

He wish he has a nice body.

He wish he was.... perfect.

But Calum always know that he's not all that is, nor he ever will be.

He know he's not funny. Sometimes people would look weirdly at him because they don't understand what the joke is about. (His bandmates would laugh, but it's probably because they think it's their duty as his boyfriends to laugh at his horrible jokes.)

He know that he's nowhere near cute. To all honesty he thinks he's annoying. His boyfriends must think that he's annoying whenever he asks them to snuggle him or cuddle with him.

He know he doesn't has an extravagant personality. He's dull and boring. That's why he often keep quiet at interviews. Because he's boring and he doesn't want to bore the people who have to hear him talk.

He has a nice body? Ha, that must be the funniest joke of the century. His body is disgusting. There's flabby fats anywhere and it disgusting. There's scars all over his body and it's disgusting. Just like he is.

And perfect? How could they describe someone as flawed and disgusting as he is as perfection? How could they even address that word to him? He know he's not perfect. Nowhere near it. He think they must be lying when they say that to him. The boys are nice people, they must not have the heart to tell him how utterly disgusting he actually is and say that he's perfect to spare his feelings. That must be it. He thinks.

But Calum doesn't see how the other boys sees him. How they look at him like he's the most precious thing in this whole world. How they adore the young boy. How they love him with all the bits in him. How utterly, irrevocably in love they all are with (what they think) the human embodiment of perfection that is Calum Hood.

And all Calum do is try, try, try to change himself. To make him "perfect". To make him how the society wants.

But he doesn't realize that all he's doing is hurting himself. And soon his lovers.

He doesn't know what all the eating less, and purging, and excessive exercise do to his body.

He doesn't realize how baggy his usual clothes is because all he thinks is that he's fat, fat, fat and need to lose more weight and it's starting to worry his lovers.

They would try to help. Bring Calum food, accompany him whenever he works out so he doesn'y over do it. Anything they think would help.

But all Calum do is push them away because he thinks he's being a burden to his boyfriends and they must think that Calum's is so much as a hassle and soon they would be sick of dealing with him. So he push them away for the time he's trying to make himself "perfect". What's perfect anymore? He doesn't even know.

Sometimes at night they could hear Calum crying and screaming and it hurt them and they want to be there for him but Calum would yell at them and would runaway for days and come back looking worse than he already is and they afraid if they come Calum would runaway and would never go back again. So they stay where they are and cry with him.

And finally, comes the day the feared most. They were sitting in the kitchen, watching Calum emerge from the basement that he claims as his personal gym, tension clear in the room when suddenly they see Calum collapse in front of the door.

They quickly rush to him. Holding his frail body, trying to wake him up, check his pulse and all that. All the while, Luke and Michael are crying. And Ashton's trying so hard not to cry with them. He has to be strong for his two, no three, boyfriends.

They look at how skinny, and how frail Calum's body is. How his cheeks are so hollow and how his eyes sunken with dark bags underneath his closed pretty brown eyes. They look at his boyfriend and couldn't help but think that this is their fault.

If only they could make Calum believe their words and not the words from the hater, if only they found out and stop it earlier before it gets this bad, if only they protect Calum more than they have. Maybe all this won't happen.

But here they are now, two crying and one try not to as they hug the frail body that is their boyfriend, wishing and praying that he'll be okay, that he'll make it through as they wait for the ambulance to come and save their boyfriend.

The three are now waiting on the waiting room of the hospital, scared out of their mind. One of the ambulance worker had said that they lost Calum's pulse and they need to go to the hospital as soon as possible. And now it's been hours since they come to the hospital and there's still no news on Calum.

Another hour and the doctor finally come to them. She explains how severely underweight Calum is and how the hospital would put food through tube in the time they induced Calum in a 24 hours coma so his body could get back the energy it needs and so Calum won't reject the food they feed him. The three boys nod understandingly and constantly thanking god and the doctor that their boyfriend is save. Not particularly okay, but that's enough for them now. And so, they agree when the doctor send them home to rest, knowing the hospital would call as soon as Calum woke up.

It's three pm when the hospital call and tell them that Calum has woken up and they swear they never move as fast as they are now.

And there, on the bed on the center of the room lay their boyfriend. Body too skinny, cheeks sunken, and eyes hollow but still as beautiful as ever.

They pampered Calum with gentle touches, hugs, and feather light kisses just to makes sure that Calum knows that they're here with him. Calum's not alone and he never has to be.

Calum's the first to cry, and then Luke, and Michael, and finally Ashton's too tired to try and be strong and cry with them. "Sorry"s are exchange and sobs are heard and kisses are still shared and at the moment they knew that they could pull through this together. That from now on, the four of them would do the fight together. That Calum wouldn't suffer alone and make the other three watch from the side. That Calum would let them give their support in order for him to win the battle. So that he would get better.

And that day was ended with the promise of getting better from the four of them.

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Don't. Touch. Me.

I don't know what I just write and why I have to write it. I made myself cry. I'm suck at being a human being.

Ew

Sasha x