Waiting For A Hero. (LARRY STYLINSON)

Chapter 10

Harry's P.O.V

"You ready for our tutoring session?" I met with Louis outside the school.

He nodded and we got on the bus, as I walked behind him, I whispered to him, "You don't have to sit by me if you don't want to. It'll be less suspicious. Go sit with your friends, I'll sit with Lindsey."

"Okay," he whispered back as he went to sit with some people in the back. I sat down next to Lindsey.

"What's up with you and Louis?" She asked.

"Well, he's coming over for...you know," I'd already told her, "and too make it look less suspicious I let him sit by his jock friends back there while I sat with you."

"Smart, but you can't give him that much wiggle room in this thing you guys have, you have to lay down the law at some point. You're making this so easy for him, pretty soon you'll just be a side boy."

"I'll talk to him about it later," I promised her.

"Alright," she dismissed the conversation and looked out the window. Girls are confusing.

We stopped at my house, I slung my backpack over my shoulder and started to stand up, I heard Louis say to his friends, "All right, I have to go to this tutoring session. See ya guys!" He called as he got up. Have to? Lindsey's right. I gave him too much wiggle room, and pretty soon he'll end up getting bored and leaving me. I need to fix this.

I got off the bus and he followed behind me, we entered the house. "Mom, Dad, I'm home!" I yelled. No one answered. "Where are you?" I called again. Huh. Weird. 

I entered the kitchen to see, and I saw a note taped to the fridge. "Dad's at work and I went with him for a work party, stay safe and no funny business with Louis :)" I read it out loud.

"Hah, your parents are funny. So, you've talked about me before have you?" He said, smirking and leaning against the kitchen table.

"Yeah, a little bit. I mean, I've liked you for a while now. I've told them I like you, and they know about our little fling thingy, and they know you're coming over, so they warned us not to do anything." I explained to him.

"Understandable." He said, swiftly. 

"We could go up to my room and hang out," I suggested, hoping that he didn't take that in a sexual way.

"Alright, I'll follow." He said as he followed me up the stairs and into my room.

I started pulling sweats out of my drawers, "You want some? I have some old ones of my dad's that I don't fit into. You can use them." I tossed the shorts at him. 

"Thanks, I'll be changing in the bathroom." 

"Just down the hall, first door on your left." I informed him, he nodded curtly and walked out. 

I changed into sweats and sat down on my bed. A few minutes later, he emerged from the bathroom. He'd taken off his letter man jacket. He was wearing a plain white V neck and the plaid sweats I gave him fit loosely around his body, he tightened them with the string in the front, and his hair was just the right amount of messy. He looked amazing. "You look great in those," I said, standing up and looking down at my skinny arms and suddenly feeling extremely self conscious.

"You look great, too," he said, looking me up and down with a slight smirk. "Now," he added, "am I allowed to kiss you?" He asked.

"Yes," I said, slightly out of breath. I sat back down on the bed and he walked over, sat by me, and started kissing me. We laid down and the kiss became more passionate, I remembered the note downstairs saying no funny business, as Louis started to pull off his shirt. 

"Louis," I broke the kiss. 

"What?" He said, he seemed out of breath too.

I paused for a second to admire his upper body, he wasn't super ripped, which is good, I don't like a lot of muscles. It intimidates me. He had enough to lift me up if needed, and he had a slight 6-pack. And a V line. V lines are always good. No matter how much I wanted him, I couldn't do this. My parents would be furious.

"I can't do this," I told him. "My parents said specifically no funny business. Besides, I'm not ready." I told him.

"I understand. I'm moving too fast," he said as he put his shirt back on and sat up. "Let's just watch a movie on your laptop or something for the time being.

"Okay," I grabbed my laptop and lay next to him as we started watching a movie. It was called 'Transformers,' I'd never seen it, and Louis said he loved it. 

I rested my head in the crook of his shoulder, and he wrapped a strong and loving arm around me. This was all I wanted. Cuddling and watching a movie. And he was willing to take it slow with me too. This was perfect.

"Louis," I said, pausing the movie. 

"Yeah?" 

I suddenly remembered the bus conversation with Lindsey. "Well, I'm worried that if I give you too much wiggle room in this relationship, you'll get bored and leave me."

"Wiggle room?" 

"Wiggle room as in me letting you sit by your friends on the bus," I explained. "I'm worried that if I keep doing it, I'll just become a little side boyfriend that will cling to your every word and you just kinda show up when you want to. Like a booty call. And pretty soon, you'll get bored and leave me. Will that happen?"

"No, I promise. I just want to keep our relationship a secret until I have the courage to come out. Is that okay? Because if it makes you uncomfortable that I'm not openly gay yet, then that's not good because I can't come out yet. And if that's not okay with you that I'm not out yet then we'll have to end this thing." 

"No, Louis, I'm just worried that you'll dump me and I'm scared."

"Would it make you feel better if I came out?" 

"Yes," I said. Hoping he will.

"That's what I thought." He said, standing up. 

"Louis, what are you talking about?" I felt my voice catch in my throat. 

"Why aren't you happy with the way things are? I'm happy. Until I have the courage to come out, and I promise one day I will, we have to keep this a secret. Isn't it better than not being together at all? I mean, I thought this was what you wanted. To be with me. You are with me, but we just hang out after school. I guess that isn't enough for you." He took off the sweats I let him borrow and put on his jeans. He threw his coat over his shoulders and turned to me. "I guess if me being here with you isn't enough, then I should go. See you at school, Harry." He said, walking out my bedroom and slamming the door.

I screwed up.

Oh no.

I screwed up big time. 

Why am I so keen on making him come out? He's not ready! Hell, if I had to suffer the torturous abuse that I did at my old school, yeah, I wouldn't come out either. Why couldn't I accept that I'd finally got him but it was just in secret. 

This is all Lindsey's fault. She's the one who gave me the idea. 

No, it's not. I didn't have to bring it up. I can't blame her.

I looked at the vacant spot that Louis had once occupied and burst into tears. I had him. I had him for one second, and I screwed up and lost him. I'm so pissed. Why am I such a jerk to him? I drove him off, and now I'll never feel the warm security that I felt when he wrapped his arm around me during the movie. 

I'm going to win him back, no matter what the cost.