The Inglorious Years They Call High School

Nothing I could do better.

The next morning I awoke to my alarm, everyday at that time I would normally get up and go for a run. But today wasn't the day for that, I had a plan for today. Today I would get up and fish out my little black dress and be like the 'popular' girls (I always thought of them more as easy than popular but I don't think myself in a postion to be stating that aloud). I decided to see if they treated me any differently, even already being 99.999999999% certain they would I was going to go to the trouble of colour matching with my bright red hair and doing everything else to their liking aswell. This meant putting up with the discomfort of wearing contact lenses.

By the time I had finished getting ready for school I was primed and primped for something that should involve alcohol, not learning. I mean you could count it as exploration of sexuality or some other sex ed thing I supposed but even that would be stretching it. My parents gave me a look over before they let me leave the house, I almost thought they were going to tell me to change before I saw a light flick on in my mums eyes as she lead me to the car.

When we arrived at the drop off bay she expressed her concern for my outfit and basically told me that what ever happens today I instigated.I was well aware of that fact and figured that the light switch must be hovering kind of in the middle, leaving the light at a dull glow. I wanted to sort out the people I genuinely like and the people who genuinely like me from the people who like me in these clothes (a person who is not me but has been formerly known to inhabit my body. I figured the perfect test, the people who liked me yesterday may treat me differently today (like the plague if I'm right) and others who may notice me today may treat me different tomorrow when I'm just me again (like the plague I'd assume again).

It's best to always assume someone doesn't like you rather then get attached and know that at some point or another they are going to crush you, everything comes at a price. Even my happiness.

As I was walking in I noticed people staring, and unlike yesterday I refused to be shy. I let my body do what I had taught it to do so many years ago, I became the bitch that everyone feared, only difference being that this was well before high school. I let my hips sway a little more in that dominant way that they do and my eyes became completely sheilded weilding an entirely bored expression. I knew how to do this, theres an unwritten handbook for that girl who looks like a slut and acts like the queen, and I wrote it, being that girl meant you didn't know what friendship was, and truth be told: I had long since forgotten what it even looked like.

When I got to my place next to Jill in English she gave me a more then wary look over, five times no less! It was kind of cute, how she looked at me like I might bite, you would think after the mess I made of the english language yesterday that she would know this isn't me. Not even Barbie could fake that anxiety. I would be lying if I said that I felt bad about doing this, I didn't trust anyone and why should I? No one has ever given me a reason to trust them.

"No one here has ever given you a reason not to" my subconcious argued. And although it was right, I was planning on getting rid of any potential problems. I didn't want to deal with the politics of high school, it was too damn easy and just stupid to be honest. I just wanted a few friends and some good-

"You look really different today" Jills comment brought my space cadet head back to earth.

"Oh,ah, yeah I do I guess. My dress was in the drier yesterday morning and so I couldn't wear it. I made such a terrible first impression"  the lie made my skin crawl, I hated lying but I figured it'd be worth it in the end.

"Oh" Jill was taken aback, she decided to look me over again, as if appraising my worth and deciding wether I was trouble or not. After about thirty seconds she seemed to be content with a decision. Just as she was about to say something else our teacher began the lesson.

It took me a moment to realize that the green eyed boy was giving me curious looks whenever it suited him and exchanging glances with Jill as if to say "what the hell?" I could see he liked how I was dressed, but he definitely thought the same as I did, that I shouldn't be dressed like this for school. That girl from yesterday, Clara I think her name was, she was looking me over as if redeciding the meaning of life. It was clear from what I saw yesterday that she was well into the politics of the school and so that look from her meant that to her appearances are everything.

I was so glad that the class was about to be over. I could get to my gym class quickly and hopefully get out of this skimpy dress. I really hated feeling naked whilst in public and so in sport class it was an excuse to be a little more clothing. Sure boobs are okay sitting in a bra with a tight dress containing them  but running around a gym?  Boobs go everywhere, wearing a top that covers all your cleavage is an important thing, even if that just means that it's fabric covered boob going everywhere it leaves more to the imagination.

When the bell finally rung I sprung out of my seat and practically ran to the gym. The class took a while to start and so I had time to put my hair up and wipe some of my make up off too. My skin felt like it could breathe again.

When the class finally started I was so relieved, I could just play sport and do what was needed. And thank god, we were playing soccer. It was one of my favourite sports, I liked running up and down the field kicking balls. I especially loved it when it rained, unlike a lot of people it relaxed me a lot.

My teacher was a gruff old man, he came off as in charge the second I got there and I was honestly astonished, I hadn't seen a teacher with that much control over a class in years. He was straight to it getting us into teams and warmed up then straight to the field to play. I couldn't express how excited I was, I mean I hadn't played soccer in the longest time and I couldn't wait to get playing.

I was so refreshed to get out on the feild, I mean it was just  so familiar with the lay out even if it wa set in a completely different place a soccer field is a soccer field. I was getting into position when I saw that I would be defending the green eyed boy. It all of sudden really started to annoy me that he wouldn't tell me his name, I mean it was supposed to be playful but he was just annoying me with it. I did not like having to refer to him as "green eyes" it really ticked me off.

Just as the annoyance started to course through me we started to play. I couldn't be more thankful for my spot on defence, I was obviously good at it. There was nothing I could do better. When green eyes got the ball I intercepted it almost immediately, I saw the shock register on his face. It was so cute, I actually liked being underestimated because peoples expressions, like the one I was adoring now were always so priceless. I stopped ogling him and dribbled to a pass down field.

I'd never had a quicker phys. ed. class, and it had never been more fun. Green eyes and I basically chased each other up and down the field after the first ten minutes, I mean it was a sport class so we weren't doing anything wrong. And it was so fun, I was running and playing and I was joking too. It really was fun to just be with someone and enjoy myself. I pestered him about his name for quite a while but he wouldn't budge.