It's been a month since graduation and I just turned nineteen.
A lot of things have happened with the band . One direction had helped us a lot and we all owe it to Louis.
Right now I'm with Luke and we're trying to decide when we should have the wedding. It's not going very well. We're fighting about dates and who should be in the wedding. My mom told me her and my dad were like this, she said it's because the guys don't like planning weddings. I don't know why I guess they think it's to girly.
I got into a fight with Calum and we haven't talked in a month. Luke's trying not to fight with me that much because he feels bad. I call Calum but he either declines or says he's to busy to talk. I cry every night because Calum was like the brother I never had.
I told Jesenia I talk to him. While all of this is happening I did some really bad things , but Luke caught me one time and now won't take his eyes off of me.
I told him sometimes I wish I could just wake up with amnesia and forget all the stupid little things. Sadly I can't. I need to get this sad shit out of my mind and out of my life. I'm supposed to be happy.
I'm happy , but sad.
