Comatose

Always on my Mind

Chapter 21

Angelica shook her head in disgust before turning away from the retreating couple. Her attention moved back to her oblivious memory as she moved up in the line. Angelica cringed as she took in the other shoppers standing with her. Just behind Angelica stood Blake Walker who had obviously seen what she hadn't if his look of pity was anything to go by. At least he wasn't prone to gossip. Two people behind him stood Trent. Again, his gaze was focused on someone other than her. Too bad he was looking at the couple she had seen as well. Unlike Blake however, his look was dangerous. If she had to guess she would say Trent wanted nothing more than to show Kevin the error of his ways. Her heart sank to the pit of her stomach knowing he had seen exactly what a sham her so called perfect life really was.

Unable to keep looking at the two men who were witnessing her husband's infidelity Angelica turned away. She was just in time to see Helen Collins make her way through the door passing by Kevin and his mistress while she openly stared. Angelica groaned in aggravation. While Blake wouldn't tell anyone Helen would. Her whole neighborhood probably knew what he had been up too. It was possible that the rumors had even gotten back to their children as well. Tears filled Angelica's eyes as shame came upon her. She wished she had known everything sooner. What a joke her life turned out to be and she was the walking punchline. Always meeting his every whim making sure to keep his life running as smoothly as possible. She had created such a stress-free life for him that she made it easy for him to find time for another. The only responsibilities Kevin truly had had been at work. Angelica took care of everything else. It was probably why he had chosen her back then. She was gullible and easily manipulated. He needed the perfect housewife and she had become that for him. It didn't appear that she had been what he had desired, however. She merely filled a need he had in his future plans and she had fallen right into place. Looking back on her life as a whole she knew that being married to a man who could provide for her hadn't been worth the payoff.

What would her life have been like now if she had never gotten on Kevin's radar to begin with? She might have never met with the man who had tried to kill her. She might not even live in the town she did now. On the other hand, she wouldn't have Tyler and Tiffany either. While her husband proved to be worthless her children where another thing. She did enjoy being a mother and couldn't imagine a life without them in it. She supposed they could have been fathered by someone else, but it was hard to fathom. They wouldn't be who they were now either. While she hated to admit it, Kevin was partly responsible for shaping the lives of their children. Sighing in defeat Angelica waited for her past self to finish checking out. She couldn't bare to look at the people bustling about the store anymore. She didn't want to see who else had witnessed her public humiliation.

Following herself back out of the store Angelica had no clear destination in mind. When she stepped out the supermarket doors she was vaguely aware of the white clouds that drifted around her. In fact, she had been walking a while in silence lost to her inner thoughts. It was only due to the voice of her subconscious that she pulled from her musings at all.

"So, what did you find out?"

"That my husband's a lying, cheating, controlling scum."

"Other than that." Her doppelganger pointed out.

"Absolutely nothing." Angelica muttered.

"Stop having a pity party and think. You had to have seen more than that."

"Oh, I did. Grace is hooking up with someone ten years younger than her. She's probably not the only one he has on the side either. The kids have been mucking about under my own nose. I'm oblivious to the dangers all around me all the time. Trent has been spying on me for years. My own husband has a side piece and who knows how long that's been going on or if she has been the only one. Oh, and let's not forget that my entire neighborhood probably knows what Kevin's been doing long before I did." Angelica finished her bitter rant gasping for the air she deprived herself of in order to get it all out. Her subconscious looked on impressed by her observations.

"Well doesn't seem like you're a completely lost cause."

"Gee thanks."

"Your welcome."

"It wasn't a compliment." Her subconscious shrugged the dig off pondering over her words.

"Is that all you noticed?" Angelica nearly bit out a quick yes but stopped and pondered over everything she had seen.

"The lilies."

"What about them?" He doppelganger asked prodding her to deeper thought.

"They were so out of place that I'm positive that they weren't really ever there."

"Okay, I'll bite."

"Could it be my mind was trying to warn me that I had seen my killer?" Angelica was in awe of the discovery and knew by the sly smile on the other woman's face that she was on to something.

"You saw more that night then you realize. Your new insights prove that." Her twin image pointed out.

"I'm not ready to go back there." Angelica whispered in fear.

"Fair enough. Where do you go from here?" Angelica took a moment to think it over.

"I follow the lilies." She pointed out.

"I hate to be the one to dampen your excitement, but you don't know which memories they'll be in." Angelica waved her warning away warming up to her idea.

"True but I know who was in the memories that they did appear in." She pointed out making her subconscious pause in reflection.

"I still don't know if that will work. How will you know which one to follow? Not to mention how many memories do you have without the others showing up or being in them as well." Angelica sagged under the weight of her words. She was right. It was going to be hard to single them out when she interacted with at least three of them within the same memory. She couldn't think of a memory that Blake existed in solely. She rarely had singular dealings with him. More often then not it was at a neighborhood function. Tyler and Jacob were always around each other or at least not far behind. She had no way of knowing when Trent would appear. Kevin was the only one she was ever alone with in a single memory and most of those weren't good memories.

"Well then what do you suggest?" Angelica asked completely out of ideas.

"Maybe it was the person who would have the most to gain if you were gone. That wouldn't explain the serial killings though. Perhaps the person you need to look at is the one who would have the least amount of motive out of all of them."

"What if I follow the wrong person? I don't have that kind of time to waste." Angelica pointed out just as disheartened by her subconscious's plan as she had been with her own.

"You need to decide what to do soon. As you pointed out, your running on borrowed time as it is." Angelica knew that already. Try as she might however, she couldn't seem to decide between the two.